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A wee bit gobsmacked by this. Do you think it's normal or odd? (Dog related)

(52 Posts)
chastenedButStillSmiling Sat 08-Apr-17 17:43:29

DD came home a few weeks/a month or so ago and asked us if we'd have her friend J's dog over the Easter hols while they are away on a family holiday. I said yes, sure, tell the parents to get in touch with me and we'd discuss. (We have a dog, which I'm guessing is why they asked. Ours is quite big - a boxer-cross and nowadays is sadly a grumpy old lady). Their dog is a little itty-bitty fluffy white thing.
Anyway, never heard from them, never gave it another thought.

DD comes home from school on Friday saying "is it still ok for you to have J's dog on Monday?". And I was "erm... had totally forgotten, but it's fine. They need to get in touch with me". DD said she'd message J. Told me today that J would come round with dog today (apparently in J's mind they were coming on Sunday, but DD had said that didn't leave them much time to find an alternative if the dogs didn't get on.

Knock on the door, it's J with the dog (who is v sweet). Her dad has dropped her and dog off and left.

WTF??? Are the parents not even going to speak to us? When DD first mentioned this, she said they were offering to pay us, but we said "don't need paying, just cover dog's expenses so we're not out of pocket"). And it was odd, because after 10 mins it was clear the dogs would be fine together, so J rang her dad who got home and literally had to come out again to come and pick her up.

DD and J (not her real inital, btw) have been friends around 2 years. J lives in the swankiest part of town in an enoooooormous pad. We live in a v ordinary terrace. I've had one face-to-face conversation with the mum and met the dad plus one text conversation. I was very aware when I met her, that I don't usually stand that close to so much money!
Do they not have ANY desire to check out where their dog will be living for a week? Do they not want to make sure we know when it's fed and what, what it's toilet routines are, etc? (J was quite vague "she doesn't really eat a lot. She likes treats" and "if you're busy she doesn't really mind not having a walk")
Do they not want to say 'thank you' to us? Maybe they'd have preferred it to have been a financial arrangement?
Maybe MN wouldn't find this odd at all. But we do.

Not sure what to do about it, though. And got no issues having the dog for a week.... We'll be at home cos sch hols, so it's not a problem, and the dog is sweet. I do think the parents are a bit rude, though. Or maybe we're the weird ones for wanting to make sure my dog wasn't going to eat theirs in one big gulp???

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Sat 08-Apr-17 17:46:37

Thought they intended to leave J too for a second!!
Odd - but take it as a compliment that you must give off fantastic doggy caring vibes!!And when they pick up be sure to let them know your holiday dates to return the favour!! grin

FiveGoMadInDorset Sat 08-Apr-17 17:48:48

Sounds odd, just make sure that they pick it up at the end of the week. Did they not leave any of its food?

CaptainBraandPants Sat 08-Apr-17 17:51:56

Sounds very odd. How old are J and your DD? Do you think her parents see it as her dog and left it for her to sort out?

Bubble2bubble Sat 08-Apr-17 17:52:41

Very odd, and they quite obviously don't give a stuff about the dog sad

But it looks like it's going ahead so I would either text asking them to give you a ring when they get a minute, to go over arrangements or send detailed quite snotty text asking for everything you need to know - routines, feeding, walks etc and a list of what you need when they bring the dog ( bedding, bowls, food, lead, harness, toys etc )

Then make a mental note to say no next time...

chastenedButStillSmiling Sat 08-Apr-17 17:54:42

I'm so glad you find it odd too. Like we're beneath them, maybe?

DD is 15, J is 14 (same year at school but summer born).

Don't they want me to have their vet's number just in case???

BellaGoth Sat 08-Apr-17 17:55:28

I think it's very odd.

If I have to leave my dogs with anybody else they get a thorough 10,000 word essay going through everything. EVERYTHING.

Did they at least give you details of the vet they use?

chastenedButStillSmiling Sat 08-Apr-17 17:55:53

On their side, they know DD quite well as she's been round to their house plenty of times. DD loves dogs, so they'll have seen how she is with theirs.

But, y'know... DD won't be feeding her or picking up her poo!

Lunaballoon Sat 08-Apr-17 17:57:24

Very rude and disrespectful IMO. You're doing them a massive favour after all. They'll probably claim they couldn't spare 10 minutes from their hectic lives to discuss things with you. hmm

chastenedButStillSmiling Sat 08-Apr-17 17:57:36

No vet details, Bella.

And our dogs are SO different. Our dog used to need a good couple of mile walks daily. Now she's old and tired she needs a lot less, but this little thing (it would fit into a handbag!)... I've got no idea how much exercise it needs.

Bubble2bubble Sat 08-Apr-17 17:58:26

Maybe they think the arrangement is with your 15yr old DD? Still entirely unacceptable!

chastenedButStillSmiling Sat 08-Apr-17 17:58:35

I asked DD if she thought the dad was rude to not even come and say hello to us. And she said he probably has to work. She said she doesn't like him that much, though.

DearMrDilkington Sat 08-Apr-17 17:59:07

Very odd... I wouldn't be surprised if you end up stuck with the dog.

gamerchick Sat 08-Apr-17 17:59:28

I think I would be ringing them up and asking for a conversation. You are not staff they can treat with contempt. You need to know things and you need to know where to go if the dog needs a vet. Don't just wing it.

Wolfiefan Sat 08-Apr-17 18:01:24

How weird! I wouldn't leave my dog with anyone I didn't know really well. might want to do a homecheck, CRB check and full interviews after taking references I may be a bit pfd! grin

BiscuitMillionaire Sat 08-Apr-17 18:07:33

It is v odd. But I think the parents think it's an arrangement between the girls. You need to be a bit more assertive about getting involved.

Enigmatic101 Sat 08-Apr-17 18:09:09

At first I wondered if it was a snobbery thing and they didn't want to be seen on your street but that doesn't explain why they won't talk to you by phone or text etc. If you're not good enough for them they shouldn't have the front to expect you to be good enough to look after their dog. Strange

DJBaggySmalls Sat 08-Apr-17 18:09:19

Thats not acceptable. They should have provided food, their vets phone number, and guaranteed any bills with their vet. I bet they don't have one.
The 'no walks' bit suggests they neglect the dog and don't really care about it.

IloveBanff Sat 08-Apr-17 18:13:06

It sounds like the consider it to be their daughter's dog and have zero interest in it.

Nousernameforme Sat 08-Apr-17 18:16:29

Phone J and ask to speak to her parents. Say something like sorry didn't get a chance to ask your husband but what sort of food does she like does she have a routine favourite toy vets number etc.

itsmine Sat 08-Apr-17 18:21:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GrumpyOldBag Sat 08-Apr-17 18:32:05

Massively weird. I'm a dog owner & would never do this.
I think you should phone J's parents 'for clarification on dog's routine' etc.
And to give them a chance to say thank you!

LadyPW Sat 08-Apr-17 18:45:35

You need vet details, feeding details & food as a basic, and I'd not be leaving my dog with anyone I'd not met (and had checked by the police, received a dozen glowing references for (double-checked by the administering of a lie detector test) had a private investigator follow for a month). But then some people are a little more lax than me. (That might on occasion be a good thing)
Oh and it's rude, unless the dog is the daughter's, but still weird and a bit rude even then.

highinthesky Sat 08-Apr-17 18:45:55

What kind of a doggy is it, out of interest? Please tell me it's a Maltese!

chastenedButStillSmiling Sat 08-Apr-17 22:35:46

Not sure of breed. It might well be Maltese. Poodle-type curls. White It's a total sweetie.

Why, high? What do you know about Maltese dogs? Are you going to tell me they're REALLY high maintenance and yap insistently?

Been out with friends and they think other parents are rude, rude, RUDE.

I'm going to go with the information we have and I'm not fussed about having her. She is very sweet. She'll get the walks she gets and the food she gets. I'm not bathing her, so they'll get a manky dog back! We might try and teach it some common habits as well for a larff.

When they drop her round I'll ask for vet details. Surely they can't drop it off with contact with us???? We'll see!

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