Inheritance issues.

[Babyroobs]

Fil sadly died almost 18months ago leaving his London house to be split between dh and his 2 sisters. It would mean a significant amount of money each when sold. One sister lives abroad, is wealthy and has not shown too much interest in the property since fil initially died. Other sil has own property in a different area of London, is financially secure has no kids and is a bit of a hoarder with a 3 bed house full of stuff and now loads of extra stuff from fil's house ( family heirlooms etc).
We are not struggling but not well off either. We have 4 kids ( our choice I know), two coming up to Uni years. Our house is literally falling down around us, think kitchen work surfaces completely rotted through, garden overgrown etc. We both work full time around each other, so there's not much time for doing DIY, maintainence etc even if we could afford it .
We are both exhausted, dh is chronically unwell and I worry about him all the time. Drs are trying to get his condition under control but at the moment it isn't and he struggles with full time work and then having to do lots of chores/ lifts for the kids etc at the weekends when I am working.
Fil's house has been on the market for well over a year with very little interest and no-one seeming very interested in doing much about it, for example reducing the price or renting it out ( would need some work to rent it out as it's old fashioned and needs updating)
Sil in London is interested in buying fil's house but has made no effort to sort her house out or get it on the market, despite offer of help to do so. The two sil's barely speak to each other and my dh tries to keep the peace and won't do anything to rock the boat.
AIBU to think things should be getting sorted after 18months? I don't want to be seen as interfering or money grabbing. I am not money orientated, we have always been broke for many years. I just think even the monthly interest on the lump sum could mean one of us could work part time to make our lives a little easier. I have urged dh to press for the house to be reduced but he won't rock the boat. It is causing friction between us. Sorry for the long post, just interested in others who have had similar situations and how they were resolved.

[Nanny0gg]

I'd be worried about leaving an empty house. Plus you are asking for trouble if it's not being maintained.

Your DH needs to step up the process if the other two can't be bothered (and he should be thinking about his family)

[NeedMoreSleepOrSugar]

I agree with the pp, regardless of the inheritance issues, it's never a great idea to leave property empty for long. Firstly, check the insurance covers it lying vacant (many don't). Then push to get things moving, be that getting it sold, rented or otherwise. If you don't, the cost of repairs will only rise, as well the risk of vandalism, accidental damage etc

[Rattata]

Would they agree to auction the house - quick and most certain way to sell. Give the sister who might want to buy the house a deadline, explain how much you need the money. If they realised how much your DH needs the money and how ill he is would they not make some efforts?

Have you sorted out any inheritance tax due - thought it had to be paid within 6 months of death.

Family inheritances are a minefield - good luck! It must be so frustrating knowing your problem could be solved but that others are impeding it!

[MrsExpo]

I think your DH needs to have a tactful discussion with his sisters and get the thing moving. If it's not sold after this amount of time it's probably over-priced for what it is. It sounds like it needs work, which might be putting people off. Get DH to have a chat with the selling agent and see if they think it's over-priced or some views on why it's not selling. This would give him some ammunition when he speaks to his sisters on the matter.

[bojorojo]

Who is the Executor for the will? It is their job to sell the house. It is their job to get the best price for it. If t is all three of them, you have a problem due to inertia and your DH is not helping. I agree that an urgent discussionneeds to be had with the Executors (is it all three of them?) because this is not acceptsble. Ask the Agent for advice on pricing or get another Agent. Be honest about the condition of the house and saleability. At least ask for prices from several agents and advice on how to sell.

Your SIL does not have a right to buy the house and she cannot circumvent the Executors. If she puts in an offer and it is accepted, she needs to get on with it or it goes back on the market again. She has no greater right to buy than anyone else and should not be allowed by the Executors to stop others getting their money. I can see why your husband finds all this difficult, but he really has to bat for his familiy and not just accept the stautus quo, ill or not. Lots of properties take longer than 6 months to sell so I guess there are ways of paying IH Tax later. That will be a big chunk I assume.

[NonsensicalNonsense]

Get the price reduced, the sisters obviously arent that bothered but get DH to say price reduced after recommendation from the estate agent as zero interest in property and high chance it could be broken into by squatters etc (just make an excuse) then enjoy your money as your FIL would have wanted. How the frig do worktops rot through!?

[Babyroobs]

The three of them are joint executors, all inheritance tax has been paid ( although that was based on the house selling for the higher price).
Nonsensical- what I mean by worktops rotting is because our kitchen is so old where the wood at the back of the sink is, it has all rotted through where it has got wet over the years.
I know the price needs reducing to sell. The sister interested in buying it was given a rough deadline which is almost up and as far as I know she has done nothing towards getting her house ready to sell.
My dh suffers from an ongoing chronic illness which won't get any better as he gets older ( he is mid 50's) unless a trial drug works for him. I would just like for him to be able to reduce his working hours or for me to give up my weekend job so that I can take some of the pressure off him at the weekend.

[LanaorAna1]

18 months is too long. But be bloody careful about any enquiries you make because you'll be screamed at for being greedy. And it's not your money. OP, I really sympathise - get the house auctioned, which should be fast.

[Babyroobs]

Lanaor. I am very aware of that, but our money has always been shared. Dh is not selfish and would willingly share inheritance with me as I would with him. My parents have helped us over the years giving us money for our house deposit/ helping us out of joint debts etc and I never saw it as my money as it was from my parents, it was just shared.

[Babyroobs]

I have told dh I have no interest in what he does with the lump sum he gets when the house sells, although I expect it will be just invested to help our kids in the future.

[LadyLapsang]

Does the will state it should be an equal 3 way split or does one person inherit more of have first dibs at buying the others out? My situation has some similarities with yours although we do not need the money like you do. Who is paying the bills and have your local council required you to start paying council tax yet or is it not habitable?

[Babyroobs]

Lady, I'm not sure about the council tax. All 3 inherited jointly in a 3 way split.

[danTDM]

It's not your DF. Really, keep well out of this. The money is not your at all. Is is between you husband and his sisters.

You can justify this wth rotting wood tops and sisters not having children. Not you bloody business.

Yes, YABU.

Don't care for responses of YANBU it won't ever stand legally as it's not legal.

[danTDM]

my 'r''s have gone rogue.

[GloriaGilbert]

Wow, I'd be really frustrated.

I would think that if a joint executor of an estate is interested in buying a house from other executors, and the value of the house is significant, you'd do well to appoint independent agents on both sides (at the buyer's expense) to ensure a fair deal.

I expect my SIL will probably want to live in my in-law's flat that she grew up in after they pass, and I know my husband would want no part of negotiating the price she pays him for his share.

[TheOriginalChatelaine]

You don't pay CT on an empty property once you have informed the council obviously.

[Babyroobs]

Gloria - Yes my dh is more than willing for the sister who wants to buy the house to buy it significantly cheaper, she was the one who cared most for their df in his latter years. However the other sil abroad was not happy with this and wanted it to go on the market to see if there were any offers.
dan - Thanks for your lovely reply !

[harderandharder2breathe]

Yanbu. Your DH needs to put pressure on his sisters to get things moving. It can't come from you it needs to be him

[Goldfishjane]

don't they need to crack on, isn't the tax bill due?

not surprised you annoyed, what a lot of faffing. I am never sure how it works though - can one person sign all the stuff if other executors are abroad?

[TheOriginalChatelaine]

Ok, if I were you I would be doing my best to persuade dh to be proactive as it's in everyone's best interests to do so. Suggest an action plan. Write it out. Phone nos. Eveything. Along side that inform the 2 other parties so they can put their twopeneth worth in. It's beyond me to see why they would object. An action plan is your friend and take a professional approach.

[TheOriginalChatelaine]

Find out from the will if the executors can act alone, jointly or sevrally. My bet is alone and your dh may not know this
Make it easy for him.

[Hulder]

After 18 months there are no offers.

This surely pretty much proves the point that there is no interest at this price.

So they have 4 options:

1. Reduce price and carry on with it on the market
   
2. Sell at auction
   
3. Let sister buy it - guarantees everyone money
   or 4) meander on as they are and no-one ever sees their inheritance.

[danTDM]

You're welcome OP
keep your nose out of inheritance that is not yours, otherwise you sound so grabby.

Obviously, you don't know the private lives and concerns of the sisters and their fathers inheritance. Unless you are mentioned in the will? If so, forgive me. You obviously know this, don't you? Or else to post about your FIL on a public forum is super embarrassing on your part. Not to mention none of our, or your, business.

[RainbowsAndUnicorn]

YABU, upto him. Your own circumstances have nothing to do with it. You wanting to give up work shouldn't hinge on his inheritance, I'd want my child to benefit not their partner.

If your SIL did the bulk of the caring, then I'd agree she should be rewarded for that and I'd ensure she had the chance to have the house. It's still quite recent and she may still be grieving and in no rush.

[Babyroobs]

Every time I try to speak to dh about it, it results in an argument ! He is clearly very frustrated about the situation but at the same time doesn't want to rock the boat especially as there has already ben problems between the 2 sisters. It doesn't help that we are a 3- 4hour drive ( if you take the dreadful M25 into account) away, so it's hard for us to help with maintaining fil's house/ keeping on top of the garden etc. When fil died, dh did more than his fair share of sorting the house/ will etc, spending a lot of time taking stuff to the tip and clearing out 90 years worth of stuff. DH also did all the inheritance tax forms himself. Sil abroad has done very little also I understand it's hard.