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AIBU?

To think parents with noisy children should take them out

95 replies

daffodil10 · 06/04/2017 11:00

Just been to my sons Easter service in church. The children were trying their best to put on a beautiful performance. A sibling in the middle of the church was screaming and driving the noisiest, most clattery truck up and down the stone floor. So noisy that no one could hear the children's play and special Easter prayers that they'd written. When my two were toddlers I would have either stood as far back as possible or stepped outside until they calmed down.

TBH I don't remember having to do either of these things as they both knew how to behave in church. I always took a large bag of snacks and quiet toys. The refusal of other parents to show some respect to the other children is one thing I won't miss about primary school when mine go to secondary.

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PinkHeart59156816 · 06/04/2017 11:03

If my child was making so much noise I and others couldn't hear I would absouletly take the child outside and it's just having a bit of respect for other people, nobody want to listen to my child's noise.

Some people however think it's fine to leave there child to scream no ruin things for others buts it's rude and imo a little bit lazy to not even try and calm your own child

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cittigirl · 06/04/2017 11:04

Yanbu

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SquatBetty · 06/04/2017 11:07

Yanbu - very selfish of the parents not to take the noisy child out.

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JustMumNowNotMe · 06/04/2017 11:07

Gosh no you aren't unreasonable, I can't stand this either. The children practice for weeks or even months on end for a performance, and selfish parents bring their toddlers who spoil it.

When DD1 gas school stuff on, me and DH go seperately so we can each take turns looking after the little ones. Not a chance would we take them!

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Cherrysoup · 06/04/2017 11:08

My brother's wedding speeches were completely destroyed by a screaming child. The video is literally screaming. I thought it was a terrible shame for him. I know people want to hear, but as a parent, I would have taken my child outside to allow everyone else to hear. Yanbu, op.

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Fitzsimmons · 06/04/2017 11:10

YANBU. My husband's 16 year old cousin turned up to our wedding with a baby we knew nothing about (the family had kept it quiet from everyone) and the baby cried throughout our vows. Was horribly distracting in what should have been a special moment Angry

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Mumzypopz · 06/04/2017 11:11

Some people love the attention....They probably think everyone else is thinking "oh what a lovely child"! I went to a remembrance Sunday service once and there was a woman behind me with a toddler, that was playing with plastic Lego, banging it on the stone floor, which of course echos! I thought it was incredibly rude, given the type of service it was aswell.

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Emmastone123 · 06/04/2017 11:15

You are totally NBU!!!!!!! It's one of my biggest bug bears (is that the right phrase?!). That and....

Parents letting their children tot/run around restaurants. a) it's utterly annoying having a child run up/past your table! B) it's dangerous - waiters walking around with hot food and drinks! It drives me up.the.WALL!!!!!

Parents sort it out!!!

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originalbiglymavis · 06/04/2017 11:19

Oh the precious little ones are just expressing themselves whilst parent fiddles with phone.
Drives me nuts too. What's wrong with being considerate?

And the thread title made me childishly think 'well that's a bit extreme...'

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Fingalswave · 06/04/2017 11:23

I experienced the same thing at a Christmas Carol concert. All the children had worked really hard and some had solos. The whole thing was ruined by one woman who allowed her child to run up and down the aisle, screaming and shouting and kicking and banging the pews for the entire concert, including two quiet solos and a harp piece. . . Everyone was looking at her as if to say "can you do something please?" And a few people said "shhhhh". But she just smiled back as if to say "isn't my child brilliant". No thought to anyone else. Mind you, none of us had the balls to complain including myself. We just sat there and seethed. It was really selfish of her though; about two or three other noisy siblings were taken out at various points, but there's always one! And I say this as someone who hates to see mothers and babies put behind glass screened rooms in church; I like to see and hear toddlers and babies but there's a limit in situations like this when none of the other children can be heard.

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Panicmode1 · 06/04/2017 11:32

Our school prohibit preschoolers from attending school events - many people complain, (and I found it hard when they were little because I have four) but it does mean that the children can perform in peace and parents can hear their children.

I can't stand the entitled behaviour that many people exhibit nowadays - as long as they are ok, sod everyone else. What happened to consideration and courtesy?!

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MusicToMyEars800 · 06/04/2017 11:36

some parents do have that whole my precious child attitude, it gets on my nerves... just because they might find it all sweet and innocent other parents don't. I would always remove my children if they were being too loud or if they got upset, it really annoys me when a child is crying/whinging/screaming and the aren't just sits there say "shhhhh".

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MusicToMyEars800 · 06/04/2017 11:37

parent not aren't

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CaoNiMartacus · 06/04/2017 11:39

The question, surely, is what would Jesus do? Jesus would suffer the little children, so from an eschatological viewpoint, you probably don't have a leg to stand on.

Halo

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TheAntiBoop · 06/04/2017 11:40

Dd's class teacher gave a younger sibling a right telling off as his parents sat smiling benignly. He did go and sit back down (parents were front row bang in the middle) - And that was after the deputy head had grabbed him and delivered him back to his parents twice.

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GabsAlot · 06/04/2017 11:41

i wold take them out-literally and i mean the parents

selfish gits

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countrygirl55 · 06/04/2017 11:44

This happened at DSD's Easter Service last year too. A couple of precious darlings spent the entire thing screaming or running around the church and the parents ignored them to watch their bigger children in their performance. Couldn't hear DSD say her lines or see her in the singing because at that point said darlings were using the pew in front as a climbing frame.

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Madwomans · 06/04/2017 11:53

The question, surely, is what would Jesus do? Jesus would suffer the little children, so from an eschatological viewpoint, you probably don't have a leg to stand on.

Halo

Maybe Jesus would have channelled the Rambo side of his personality, the one that saw him running amok with a whip and flogging the moneylenders out of the temple?

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user1489179512 · 06/04/2017 11:55

Of course they should take those noisy children out. That they choose not to speaks volumes about them and their attitude to others.

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SovietKitsch · 06/04/2017 11:59

How have you had your Easter service?! It's still lent! #missespointofthread

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countrygirl55 · 06/04/2017 12:01

Think they are doing them early this year as Easter falls in the middle of the hols and it's a school thing.

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AngelThursday · 06/04/2017 12:30

I can think stand this either. At my DS's school, when he was little, the HT used to make it very clear noisy little ones had to be taken out. There were a few grumbly parents initially but they soon stopped when they realised the majority agreed with the HT. It meant that performance should could be enjoyed by all

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daffodil10 · 06/04/2017 13:13

Yes we have had it as the children break up for school holidays on Friday. The vicar made the children aware that it is still lent and invited everyone to church in the holidays for good Friday and Easter Sunday services

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TheWitTank · 06/04/2017 13:18

We are lucky (?!) to have an extremely militant, old fashioned headmistress who does not take any shit from child or parent. She always does a quick announcement beforehand about noisy toddlers and babies and would be up in a shot removing a screamer. It's great (although I did get bollocked once for walking on the grass Grin)

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WelliesAndPyjamas · 06/04/2017 13:21

Oh, YES YES YES, totally agree with you, OP! I can't stand it and also get the rage when the parent(s) just sit there smiling as if it's all so very cute 🤔 When mine were little, the slightest little noise would have me running outside with them, and I just don't understand why some people won't do the same.

We have a lovely small school, family atmosphere etc blah blah, which includes siblings being very welcome at assemblies, performances, and church services, part of the school family life and all that...but in the last 18 months it has taken one ridiculously noisy toddler to spoil everything for me. I only go to about 1 in 4 events now. The HT has been very clear about rules on noisy younger children, but this particular mother is totally oblivious to the effect her child is having. I'm guessing he will have to just take her to one side about it soon, as it is ridiculous.

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