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AIBU - to think my DH has finally lost the plot!

(42 Posts)
HarHer Mon 03-Apr-17 08:40:10

My DH and I have been living apart for two years. I live with our two teenage sons under quite challenging circumstances (they both have additional needs). I work from home and DH visits with his washing and woes on a daily basis.

Basically, my DH has got in touch with a quirky 'friend'. The friend has encourage DH to pay him a small fee to produce an e-book about aliens and assured him that it will make DH a small fortune. My DH has now constructed an 'alien village' out of bits of tin foil, gold paint and scrap and texted me last night to say he was taking pictures of his village in the local park as a front cover for his 'book'. He added that he has had to keep 'dodging' people in the park who have been giving him funny looks.
The 'friend' believes emphatically that he was abducted by aliens and my DH now thinks he shared the experience.

AIBU in thinking (a) my DH has finally lost his marbles;

(b) if he is not experiencing some sort of mental breakdown, he should stop arsing about with tin foil and paint pots and get a job so he can support his family?

Allthebestnamesareused Mon 03-Apr-17 08:50:46

I seriously had a quick look to see if this was posted on Saturday morning (1 April).

First you sound as bonkers as him if he has lived apart for 2 years but he still brings his washing to you!

Secondly, he has been duped by his friend into handing over cash!

Thirdly, he is going to get himself into all sorts of trouble if people are openly perturbed that he is taking pictures in the park. Hopefully not of small children playing there!!!

If this is a wind up - you're 2 days too late!

tinglyfing Mon 03-Apr-17 09:00:03

If this is real and you are concerned then you need to have a serious chat with him to see how his state of mind is. Get advice from mental health professionals.

SquinkiesRule Mon 03-Apr-17 09:00:56

He has lost the plot.

dowhatnow Mon 03-Apr-17 09:07:03

Pictures in the park for a fictional story - ok.
Actually believing he was abducted - stark staring bonkers.

CasperGutman Mon 03-Apr-17 09:09:41

You've been separated for two years and you still let him bring his washing round. YABU for this alone. Have you lost the plot too?

MrsMeeseeks Mon 03-Apr-17 09:12:00

What Caspar said. Never mind the aliens.

MamaLazarou Mon 03-Apr-17 09:14:56

Does he not have running water at his place?

floraeasy Mon 03-Apr-17 09:15:56

Sounds like a Walter Mitty type. This could be his form of escapism from the harshness of life, where other men would choose alcohol or whatever.

Could be entertaining on occasion, but ultimately frustrating for you trying to get him to act like an adult.

I don't know what to suggest, really! His friend seems to have quite an influence on him - more than you do it seems.

Perhaps you could work the alien thing into what you want him to do. For instance, make up a backstory about how you have heard the best aliens (you know, the green ones with the pointy ears) are amazing providers for their families. grin

VeryButchyRestingFace Mon 03-Apr-17 09:17:01

Fuck the aliens.

Tell him to stop bringing his washing round.

HecateAntaia Mon 03-Apr-17 09:19:58

you do his washing or he brings his washing and uses your machine?
and you listen to him moan?

why?

and yes. he sounds unwell. perhaps stepping back might be a good idea. you arent a professional and that might be the help he needs.

Trifleorbust Mon 03-Apr-17 09:21:12

The washing confused

He sounds unstable. I would be encouraging him to visit his GP and the bagwash

southall Mon 03-Apr-17 09:27:27

When did your DH tell you all this?
April the 1st by any chance?

TheFirstMrsDV Mon 03-Apr-17 09:31:18

I can't get past you looking after your two boys with SN and doing his washing while he fucks about in a park with tinfoil

TheFirstMrsDV Mon 03-Apr-17 09:34:50

While I am here.

Is it passed or past? I used to think I knew but now I am never sure.

Sorry OP.

Oldraver Mon 03-Apr-17 09:35:02

What Mrs DV said...

Does he just use your machine or what ?

Eatingcheeseontoast Mon 03-Apr-17 09:39:10

TheFirstMrsDV past I'm fairly sure....without googling.

HecateAntaia Mon 03-Apr-17 09:39:30

it's past.

NerrSnerr Mon 03-Apr-17 09:42:41

Why is he your dear/ darling husband if you haven't been living together for 2 years? Surely he's your ex?

I'm also stuck on the fact that he brings his washing round.

SparklyMagpie Mon 03-Apr-17 09:45:48

I just can't believe you do his washing!!

Flowerfae Mon 03-Apr-17 09:46:37

Tell him to sod off and do his own washing, you are not his mother.
Make sure he doesn't start building mountains out of mashed potato like the man in close encounters of the third kind.

HardcoreLadyType Mon 03-Apr-17 09:57:24

Passed is the past participle of the verb "to pass" (as in "she passed her exams").

Past is a noun (as in "he went past") or sometimes an adjective (as in "times past").

In your case, its a noun. It's the thing you can't get.

(Happy to be corrected - I love this stuff. Sad, I know.)

LordRothermereBlackshirtCunt Mon 03-Apr-17 09:57:27

Are you writing a novel? This all sounds very odd.

HarHer Mon 03-Apr-17 09:57:35

Thank you,

The friend he lives with is 77 and a bit set in his ways, so DH brings his washing round. I never really had a problems with this, his smalls etc just went in with everything else. However, the whole 'alien' thing has sort of made me question whether I am inadvertently encouraging him to escape all his responsibilities (caring for the boys, earning a living and doing his laundry, for example) and allowing him to drift into this strange fictional world.

I have no problem with anyone pursuing creative interests, but DH is convinced this 'book' will make him a lot of money and I feel this is very unrealistic.

The 'ex' thing is something I am coming to terms with.

MrsMeeseeks Mon 03-Apr-17 09:58:58

The friend he lives with is 77 and a bit set in his ways, so DH brings his washing round.

Clear as mud.

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