Advanced search

To expect an answer to this text

(29 Posts)
wineoclockthanks Sun 02-Apr-17 11:45:42

'Hi X. Thank you for having DS1 tonight (sleepover). Have a lovely holiday and look forward to hearing all about it when you get home.'

I'm really not very good at text etiquette <old gimmer> I tend to text as I would speak e.g.

Hi X. Would be lovely to see you, fancy a coffee at Y cafe next Tues or Wed? Hope everyone including your cat, neighbour, best friend..... (you get the picture) are well. Xx

Whereas what I often get from people is

'Coffee, Cafe Y 3pm Tues?'

Which if I'm honest I find a bit rude blush

Very happy to be told that I am being totally old fashioned unreasonable grin

WarwickDavisAsPlates Sun 02-Apr-17 11:52:36

Yeah sorry if I received that text message I wouldn't think I had to answer it. At most I might send a quick "no probs we enjoyed having him. See you when we get back." Message.

It probably just depends why you text people. I've got a friend who texts to chat, while I only text to arrange something so my texting style would be more like the one you would consider "rude".

I'd say neither is right or wrong, just different styles.

Ginkypig Sun 02-Apr-17 11:53:18

I'm like you but Iv sort of accepted that I'm mostly not the same as most others. Most people shorten txts as much as possible but not all of them do the y, u, gr8, thing which really annoys me.

I'd initially find that txt rude(ish) too but then I'd shrug it off and get excited about nice company and cake grin

TreeTop7 Sun 02-Apr-17 11:54:14

I know what you mean, but texts are supposed to be brief. I'd use email or messenger for something longer.

5moreminutes Sun 02-Apr-17 12:07:31

No, that text at the top of your op doesn't sound as though it requires or expects an answer.

I text in full sentences too but that's just a thank you for a minor thing which will probably be reciprocated text. If they answer, then presumably unless they only write "You're welcome" you answer their answer, it dragon and becomes an open ended small talk text dialogue.
You'll be penpals before you know it wink

5moreminutes Sun 02-Apr-17 12:08:30

*drags on not dragon 🐉

haveacupoftea Sun 02-Apr-17 12:10:46

That text doesnt require a response. Though these days that message would usually be sent via whatsapp and you'd get a kissy face emoji back grin

Universitychallenging Sun 02-Apr-17 12:11:40

I wouldn't think to answer that and if I did i would probably just say "no probs"

GoodyGoodyGumdrops Sun 02-Apr-17 12:16:17

I think it is a bit of an old gimmerish thing. I'll bet you never cared to text before smartphones, when you had to press the 2 button three times to get a letter C. I know I didn't! Now that I have a proper qwerty keyboard I burble away happily.

The first text IMO doesn't need a reply. If it was from a friend of mine I might just reply with a smiley.

The reply to the second text, well, I think I'd assume they were busy and rushed off a quick reply rather than make you wait.

FrancisCrawford Sun 02-Apr-17 12:17:55

I'm another one who texts full sentences (complete with punctuation!) but there is nothing in the first text that suggests any sort if response is required.

Think about it this way - if you received a "thank you" letter would you then write a letter thanking them for thanking you? where would it end?

Just because texting is quick and easy doesn't make endless replies necessary, far less polite.

Asmoto Sun 02-Apr-17 12:18:17

No, I wouldn't - you've said you look forward to hearing about their holiday when they get home - as recipient, I'd take that to mean you weren't expecting to hear from me again until I got back from my holiday.

picklemepopcorn Sun 02-Apr-17 12:25:19

If I replied to that, it would be with a smile. But I learned to text from a teen who thinks 'k' is a whole sentence.

wineoclockthanks Sun 02-Apr-17 12:40:39

I had a feeling it was me grin thanks (but I'm glad I'm not the only one!)

picklemepopcorn Sun 02-Apr-17 12:45:22



WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo Sun 02-Apr-17 12:47:12

I use full sentences and punctuation in text messages. But I often end up in conversations and never know how to end them politely! It's the same with Facebook messenger. I'm rubbish at chit chat so it always feels a bit awkward. I'd much rather keep texts etc to a minimum and then talk properly in person smile

Anyway, I probably would reply to your text message. But it doesn't require one so if I'd sent it I wouldn't be disappointed not to receive one.

JonesyAndTheSalad Sun 02-Apr-17 12:48:01

I would expect a quick "Thanks :D" or something. I also text in full sentences though.

wineoclockthanks Sun 02-Apr-17 12:53:46

WarwickDavis is right, I see texting as 'chatting'

<Frantic waving> to Leslie , I still can only lurk on the tamoxigang thread but I am about.

reuset Sun 02-Apr-17 12:57:32

I'd reply. I type in whole sentences too

daisypond Sun 02-Apr-17 13:10:46

The top one doesn't need a response.
I write texts infrequently, and they would probably be in the category you consider rude. I don't have a smartphone, and it takes me a while just to get the basic info out. People I text, though, know that and aren't offended.

JonesyAndTheSalad Sun 02-Apr-17 13:14:26

Daisy it does need a response because it's a thank you and some well wishes. Only a really rude person would ignore a thank you and a "have a good holiday" ffs.

All it takes is :D thanks! That's hardly backbreaking.

hmcAsWas Sun 02-Apr-17 13:19:17

I hate texting because I am properly an old gimmer rather than a wannabe old gimmer like you wineoclockthanks wink

So I can be slack with my timescale in responding to texts, and am certainly brief when I do because I do not want to encourage and endless back and forth text conversation. I would probably respond to your first text with a 'No problem x' , but it is conceivable that I would forget to respond

RitaMills Sun 02-Apr-17 13:25:43

I would've answered 'Aw you're welcome, thank you x' I wouldn't have not said anything but it is a thing I've noticed with some people, I've become used to it but I wouldn't do it myself.

daisypond Sun 02-Apr-17 13:30:00

I disagree. I don't think it's rude not to reply to the first one. That is a "finishing conversation" text, to my mind. The conversation is to be carried on "when you get home".

Bluntness100 Sun 02-Apr-17 13:39:53

I'd respond to the first one, but I respond to everything as I feel not doing so is kinda rude and not acknowledging. I don't know anyone who doesn't though, even if it's just a thanks or a kiss.

I don't use text speak because my life isn't so busy that I can't spare the extra seconds to write it out properly,,,😂

Asmoto Sun 02-Apr-17 13:47:47

I agree with Daisy - I'd take the first text as a signal not to reply (immediately), because it suggests the next point of contact being 'when you get home'. If it had just said 'Have a lovely holiday' I'd probably have replied 'Thank you'.

I don't use text speak either, and shy away from 'gushy' additions to texts such as 'x's on the end of messages - I see them as being to-the-point communications, and prefer to pick up the phone and speak if I want a chatty conversation.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: