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AIBU to think he should come on this weekend break?

(6 Posts)
weekendbreakpotentiallyruined Thu 30-Mar-17 21:50:27

I booked a 2 night break for me and my DP as a surprise a couple of months ago. He works in the family business so I checked with his dad whether the weekend would be OK for him to have the time off and all was fine so I booked and paid for it. I then presented the break to my DP on Valentine's Day and he said it sounded really good and that he was really looking forward to it. I should also note that it is my birthday while we are away. The other reason I booked it as a surprise is that it is notoriously difficult for him to agree to take time off from his work (which is why I agreed it with his Dad first).

We are now coming up to close to the time of the break and DP is now saying that he is not sure whether he will be able to come. His reason is that the weather is going to be good on the days we will be away meaning that he will be missing time in the business when certain jobs can be done. I appreciate he cannot control the weather but AIBU to be very annoyed and think that he should still come away with me? His Dad will still be at the business and he does have a brother who works in the business too (although he does also work elsewhere from time to time too), but his brother could help out too if required.

As background he works 7 days a week, 15 hour days, so any time that we do get is few and far between, with a few hours snatched on a Sunday afternoon and from 10.30/10.45pm - midnight on other days being the only time we really see each other when he gets home from work (the late time that they work to in the business and that he then gets home from work being a whole other issue).

Whilst I could maybe find someone else to go with me, the whole point of the break was for us to spend some much needed time together away from work. It is also my birthday, so I really wanted to spend it with him rather than anyone else.

I really think he should make the effort and come along but I would appreciate other views!

BendingSpoons Thu 30-Mar-17 21:58:43

Of course he should come. Sadly you come a poor second to his work by the sounds of it. Most people would be pleased to be going away when it is nice weather.

ThePiglet59 Thu 30-Mar-17 21:58:49

Tell him that you are going anyway, and that perhaps it is time for you to look for a man that is happy to spend some time with you.

His work/life balance is ridiculous.

Is there any point in you calling him your partner?

KinkyAfro Thu 30-Mar-17 21:59:00

Sounds like he just doesn't want to go, something wrong if he'd rather be at work

OnceYouAreReal Thu 30-Mar-17 21:59:49

He should make the effort. You really need to calmly explain that he needs to make you and your relationship a priority here. Especially considering the balance of work / life is very skewed to start with.

I'd be very hurt if he didn't go.

weekendbreakpotentiallyruined Thu 30-Mar-17 22:07:09

He is a farmer so it is difficult to leave the farm and that is obviously why he has to work 7 days a week, but because he works such long hours I was really looking forward to this break. He may still come yet, but I am annoyed that he has even raised the prospect that he might not!

He says that he would rather come on the break but "he just doesn't know whether he can". In my eyes there is no conversation to be had. He should be coming no matter what!

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