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To be fuming with school.....

(210 Posts)
Inthebathtub Thu 30-Mar-17 17:46:27

DD is 13 and as teenagers do, filling out in all the areas you'd expect a girl to. She has 2 pairs of school trousers that were bought in line with the school policy of no leggings or skinny leg trousers.
I've noticed they've become a bit snug around her bottom and thighs recently and as I literally live in a small village, don't drive, and nearest major shopping town is an hour away by bus, we've planned on a shopping outing in easter hols. I would go sooner but there's not enough time after school on the evenings I'm off and I work every sat and sun in the villiage. Had the hols not been so close I'd have ordered online but the couple of weeks also means I can put a bit aside each week and get a couple of decent pairs for her.
I get a snotty call from the teacher today complaining that DD's uniform isn't conforming to regulations as her trousers are skinny type. I explained that yes, they've got a bit snug however she's not uncomfortable and I am planning on new ones, and they're not skinny trousers, they're the same ones she's worn this school year and she is developing, and that they will be replaced asap.
Snotty teach then informs me that she must be in correct uniform by Monday or face discipline procedure for having incorrect uniform.
I once again tried to explain the above but basically they're not interested, and my daughter now faces discipline for developing and filling her trousers a little more than they'd like and for basically being from a family that doesn't have the ready cash to go straight out and replace stuff at their whim!
I am astounded, they are the same trousers that have conformed all bloody year and yes, she's put on a bit of weight developing and due to that the trousers will be replaced - when I can damned well afford it!

I eventually said I wanted to speak to someone else as this was ridiculous, and am ringing the deputy head tomorrow.


KingJoffreysRestingCuntface Thu 30-Mar-17 17:49:52

Tell them to fuck off.

She's been wearing the same trousers all term and they've only just mentioned them? They can jog on.

Ask if it's their policy to make children feel self conscious about their changing bodies because that's basically all they're going to achieve.

WorraLiberty Thu 30-Mar-17 17:50:28

Had the hols not been so close I'd have ordered online but the couple of weeks also means I can put a bit aside each week and get a couple of decent pairs for her.

Just buy one pair online and the rest later?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius Thu 30-Mar-17 17:51:55

Could your dd go in to town on the bus by herself or with a friend this weekend, to buy new trousers? Or could you order some from a catalogue and pay a bit extra for next-day delivery?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius Thu 30-Mar-17 17:52:36

Failing that, do you know anyone who could let out the side seams for you, as a temporary measure?

Sirzy Thu 30-Mar-17 17:53:23

I would just do what worra has said and order one pair online.

neonrainbow Thu 30-Mar-17 17:53:32

School are being ridiculous.

originalbiglymavis Thu 30-Mar-17 17:55:09

Borrow a pair? We did this when I realized that I'd donated DSs packed up summer unform to the charity shop by mistake just before the new term and I couldn't get my hands on the right type of shorts quickly. Fortunately his best mate is a bit larger.

Paperdolly Thu 30-Mar-17 17:57:09

Just buy one pair on line with next day delivery. Simples. I admire a school that sticks to its standards. Or you could move schools?

Hygellig Thu 30-Mar-17 18:03:36

I'd admire a school that didn't humiliate young girls and harass their parents over something so petty! I think they are being ridiculous given that the trousers were suitable earlier in the year.

palebluesky Thu 30-Mar-17 18:06:39

How unpleasant of them. Its really annoying when things like this are sprung on you.

Inthebathtub Thu 30-Mar-17 18:11:22

I must have missed the school standard that states children mustn't fill out..... I get that they have to stick to the standards and I agree with it, my issue is that up until today she has 100% in uniform - and they're the same trousers!

Paperdolly Thu 30-Mar-17 18:14:29

I reckon the Dep.Head will negotiate that she can appear after the Easter hols in new trousers anyway.

LindyHemming Thu 30-Mar-17 18:21:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

remoaniac Thu 30-Mar-17 18:25:24

Is it an academy? If not, you could complain to the LEA. If it's an academy, you're stuck with their stupid rules.

Why do schools think all parents are loaded? You could just write a firmly worded email and make the point that kids should not be disciplined for the "sins" of the parents and you will be making a formal complaint to the governors if they do.

But again, if it's an academy, don't know what you can do.

SusieOwl4 Thu 30-Mar-17 18:26:22

I would get some trousers somehow to avoid embarrassment. However I would put your point in writing because as you say they have been ok all year so they are not exactly inappropriate are they? I normally would side with the school as I personally like to see discipline in this area but I think you do have a valid point .

Trifleorbust Thu 30-Mar-17 18:27:02

If you bought a skirt down to her knee when she was in Y7 and by Y10 it meant visible underwear, you'd change it, yes? You wouldn't say, "Oh but it's the same."

They are being a bit inflexible but they have to be. Give an inch on uniform and people take a mile the piss

Sirzy Thu 30-Mar-17 18:28:29

That's a good way of looking at it trifle

SuperRainbows Thu 30-Mar-17 18:29:32

My daughter was told last week that the school shoes she's been wearing all year and passed multiple inspections in are not school shoes.

Discobabe98 Thu 30-Mar-17 18:31:28

Tbh I wouldn't be ordering her any at all and stick by what you have planned to get them over Easter! It would've been an idea to get one pair online to do her until Easter and then when you had the money to get a few more pairs buy them then but due to school being ridiculously non-understanding I'd not bother in spite!! My school was like this too with shoes, hair colour etc assuming everyone had the means/ time/ money to get it sorted for the next day! It's just a joke

Sittinginthesun Thu 30-Mar-17 18:36:05

I've just bought DS new school trousers, less than a week before he breaks up, as he's mid growth spurt and couldn't actually do them up on Monday (the were tight, but okay last Friday hmm). They were looking quite indecent.

In your position, I'd order them online, tell the Deputy that they were in the post.

That1950sMum Thu 30-Mar-17 18:39:01

I actually think the school are being reasonable. Ok, maybe a bit hard line in insisting it is sorted before the school hols, but their rules are sensible.
Your daughter can't have filled out overnight. Surely as the trousers started to get tight you should have budgeted for a new pair. If they are now so tight they are causing the school concern, then you've probably left it too long.
I think trifle has put it very well.

NapQueen Thu 30-Mar-17 18:41:02

Rules are rules. The trousers no longer conform. Order some trousers online and get over yourself.

Tesco do dress trousers for adults for 6 quid so id imagine the kids ones are cheaper again. And so what if they only last til easter.

fruitbrewhaha Thu 30-Mar-17 18:41:31

You say you noticed recently they have been getting snug. So it hasn't happened overnight.
If you knew the rules you can't complain.
Order some tonight and you'll have them by the weekend.

Dancergirl Thu 30-Mar-17 18:42:38

Tell them to fuck off

I'm amazed that people have arguments with their child's school over this sort of thing. Getting on the wrong side of the school will not help your child's education.

OP - surely your dd didn't outgrow the trousers overnight? You can pick up school trousers quite cheaply.

So they have a strict uniform policy? Good. Goes hand in hand with good discipline IME.

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