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AIBU?

To be hurt by their lack of enthusiasm?

20 replies

PickettBowtruckle · 29/03/2017 20:43

It's possible that I'm acting like a complete princess about this but I'm not sure!

My graduation is in a few months even though I completed my degree last summer. I completed my BA in 3 years, but through evening classes while working full time, even though my course was considered 'full time'. I'm really proud of this, and am also the first person in my family both maternal and paternal sides to have attended university (which may be why they don't get it?).

Graduation tickets were released about 3 weeks ago - you get 2 initially and then leftovers go on sale the following month. My dad and husband were meant to book the first 2, and then my mum and Nan wanted to get tickets if they could. I reminded them all a couple of times when they were first released but not since. I asked tonight if they'd been booked and nope, they haven't. Went on to book and the only tickets left are in the rear of the upper circle of the hall. So basically absolutely rubbish seats, they'll barely see me and I definitely won't see them. They just kind of shrugged, said yes the tickets were rubbish, and closed the page.

I'm actually really upset about this and don't even want to go anymore. It's a big deal up in London, I'd arranged to get my hair done in the morning and was meant to go dress shopping with my mum (that's not happened yet either) and just kind of feel why am I going to all this effort.

Just feeling very sorry for myself at the moment

OP posts:

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CMamaof4 · 29/03/2017 20:47

Aww, Well done to you! If my child did this I would be extremely proud.

Tell them how you feel.

sirfredfredgeorge · 29/03/2017 20:50

The big deal is the achievement, not the ceremony, ceremonies are things lots of people hate and don't enjoy. Don't assume it's anything but the ceremony that they're not impressed with - I'm sure they value your achievement!

ImperialBlether · 29/03/2017 20:50

Yes, tell them how you feel. They should be SO proud of you and doing whatever they could to make it a special day for you.

PickettBowtruckle · 29/03/2017 21:02

Thanks all :)

Unfortunately I wouldn't get anything out of talking about it to them as it wouldn't mean they could now get good tickets.

My husband did acknowledge when I completed my degree as I excitedly called him when I got the email confirming my dissertation grade and final grades, but generally it hasn't really been acknowledged by parents!

OP posts:

Craftylittlething · 29/03/2017 21:03

It could be that whilst they are really proud of you, they are intimidated by a graduation ceremony?

WineIsMyMainVice · 29/03/2017 21:10

Congratulations on your achievement!
Keep in your mind what all this is about - your degree. Not the 20 seconds that you will find yourself on stage receiving your piece of paper. Sorry to be blunt but your qualifications will last much much longer than that moment. Go enjoy it - but you've done it for yourself. Just remember that.
Well done again.

2cats2many · 29/03/2017 21:15

I didn't even go to my graduation ceremony. I was very proud of myself when I completed my degree- mature student, supported myself throughout, etc. I just didn't think the ceremony bit was important. Maybe that's how they feel too? They're really proud, but don't realise how important it is to you because it isn't important to them?

supermoon100 · 29/03/2017 21:16

If there's one thing I've learnt in life is that sometimes you have to be your own support system. In your shoes I woulda bought all the tix myself, best seats. It's in your interests more than theirs. You have to try and fulfill your own needs. Well done btw

Happyandhungry · 29/03/2017 21:26

They sound like douche bags. Go on your own have an amazing day and forget them xx

PickettBowtruckle · 29/03/2017 21:28

happyandhungry that really made me laugh, thank you! Sometimes I just need to hear that

They know it's important to me as I asked my mum to come dress shopping with me and told them I was getting my hair done etc. I think it's more than it just wasn't important enough to them to remember...

OP posts:

celtiethree · 29/03/2017 21:49

Agree with Supermoon I would have arranged for the tickets. I don't think they're douche bags just disorganised.

Crumbs1 · 29/03/2017 22:47

Our children booked the tickets to their graduation ceremonies and gave them to us when they saw us. Most seats are fairly rubbish and there is very little to see at the actual ceremony, so not a huge deal.
I'm sure they're proud but not as excited as you are.

CaspoFungin · 29/03/2017 22:48

Yeah you should have booked the tickets for them, that's what everybody I know did.

PickettBowtruckle · 29/03/2017 22:50

I would've booked if they'd asked me to but both agreed they'd do it themselves as the extra £50 for two tickets on top of the robing costs for myself would've made it an expensive event for me. They both said they were fine with the £25 to buy a ticket so I assumed that meant they knew they'd have to do it.

OP posts:

ThePiglet59 · 29/03/2017 23:10

Ah bless you.
I didn't attend mine, as I remembered my son's where David Frost droned on about Nixon for about three hours, boring the arse off everybody. Sod that with my bladder!
It's a pity that your family CBA though.

dinosaursandtea · 29/03/2017 23:14

That's just rude. They may not understand the importance of the ceremony in general, but it's clearly important to you. And I'm sorry, but I don't have patience for people who don't support their kids regardless of age because they might be 'intimidated'. Grow up!

Carolinesbeanies · 30/03/2017 00:07

Try not to let this spoil your day. They will be there. They will be and are incredibly proud Im sure. It was probably as big a surprise to them that you dont just get their early and wander into a 'school hall' to grab the good seats.

The actual award bit can go on for a while, (well depending how many there are of you graduating), but your moment is indeed fairly brief and I always felt sorry for the last 10, as applause defo wanes a little after youve done the previous 30/60/90 ...pick a number.
The rest of the day is great too and theyll really get into the spirit of it. You may not see them OP at that actual award moment, but Ill guarantee youll hear them! 😀 Enjoy the day knowing theyre there and are indeed very proud of your achievement. Well done by the way.

SparkleSunshine201 · 30/03/2017 01:12

They usually keep some tickets back which they release for sale on the day. If you get there early you could get them. I'd ring up and ask your uni.

Congratulations

TisMeTheLadFromTheBar · 30/03/2017 01:18

Could you ask around and see if your class mates might have got extra tickets they are not using? Well done on your results and hard work. Don't let them spoil your day.

supermoon100 · 30/03/2017 07:10

The expense of the event would have been shared between you and your husband though surely?

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