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AIBU to not go to the wedding

(118 Posts)
519888888z Tue 28-Mar-17 10:17:08

Really don't know what to to do for the best. Meant to be flying to brother's wedding tomorrow - it's in Australia with DH and children. Dd (5) has unexpectedly been taken very ill and is in hospital (with me). Not life threatening but nasty. Obviously she can't go. DH thinks we will just have to let DB down. Children all very disappointed but that's being part of a family. DB and SIL think I should go with rest of kids and leave DH to look after DD. I don't feel I can be on the other side of the world from sick child. Supposing she got worse?? I can understand how disappointed it is not to have his only family there but what can I do? He is furious but I'm hoping when wedding madness calms down (and they possibly have their own kids) they will understand.

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface Tue 28-Mar-17 10:18:57

I wouldn't leave my child if they were unwell.

Writerwannabe83 Tue 28-Mar-17 10:19:39

There's no way I'd go!

xStefx Tue 28-Mar-17 10:21:00

Its your child, if you want to stay and look after her then stay. Its s shame but cant be helped. There was a thread not long ago where a family of 5 had booked to go to Florida and the mum wasn't sure what to do as one child had fallen ill, I really felt for her.

You wouldn't be right or wrong to go OP, I have a 5 year old DD and would want to be with her if she was ill. Plus Australia is a long way away if she was to get worse. Hope she feels better soon x

flowery Tue 28-Mar-17 10:21:05

I wouldn't be going, and any of my (3) brothers would understand.

stitchglitched Tue 28-Mar-17 10:21:41

No way would I go!

Only1scoop Tue 28-Mar-17 10:23:29

When is dd lightly to be well enough to leave hospital? Were you meant to be there for some time?
Hope dd better soon I wouldn't be able to leave her either.

Doyouwantabrew Tue 28-Mar-17 10:24:02

Can't your dh go with the other children?

WannaBe Tue 28-Mar-17 10:24:21

I wouldn't go. And frankly if any family member had an issue with that then I think it would permanently affect our relationship..

ILoveDolly Tue 28-Mar-17 10:24:41

I contactus no you can go in the circumstances. Australia is so far, it isn't like you can pop back.

Only1scoop Tue 28-Mar-17 10:24:47

I was wondering the same? Could your Dh go?

isupposeitsverynice Tue 28-Mar-17 10:25:30

Not to Australia, no way. I feel for your brother, it is really disappointing I'm sure, but to be furious at you is deeply unfair. I'm sure he will calm down once he's had time to think about it. I hope your dd makes a swift recovery flowers

ILoveDolly Tue 28-Mar-17 10:25:45

Sorry *can't see that you can go....

519888888z Tue 28-Mar-17 10:26:30

DH doesn't want to be away from DD either. Says he would be worried. sick. Wedding beginning of next week. DD won't be able to travel for ages.

Awwlookatmybabyspider Tue 28-Mar-17 10:28:57

You are 1,000,000% not being unreasonable.
You children come before anyone and anything. Plus when they're not well they just want mum, don't they.

Awwlookatmybabyspider Tue 28-Mar-17 10:30:13

Oh and if your db is furious. He'll just have to have his tantrum and get over it.

NataliaOsipova Tue 28-Mar-17 10:30:45

Your child is in hospital. Say you lived in Manchester and the wedding was in Leeds? Yes - you could probably do as your brother suggests and pop over for the ceremony. But Australia???? He's being ridiculous.

gonegrey56 Tue 28-Mar-17 10:30:47

You can't go and as a family you need to be together to deal with your dd and her recovery. That's it, that's what caring parents do . Other family members are out of order for not recognising this. Don't feel bad about the situation, these things happen and decent people will understand.

Doyouwantabrew Tue 28-Mar-17 10:32:57

Oh well if your dh wants to stay with his child too of course he should and of course you can't leave her.

Your db needs to get over himself.

ExplodedCloud Tue 28-Mar-17 10:34:36

I'd be staying home and so would DH.
She's 5 FFS. He needs to give his head a wobble.

itsmine Tue 28-Mar-17 10:35:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

elliejjtiny Tue 28-Mar-17 10:36:03

YANBU at all. I hope your DD gets better soon.

Oogle Tue 28-Mar-17 10:37:03

I wouldn't be going either. YANBU.

BadTasteFlump Tue 28-Mar-17 10:46:14

YANBU. Don't go - you and your DH need to be here with your sick child.

If your relatives don't understand that, it's their problem not yours.

If you plan a wedding literally on the other side of the world, you have to accept that some people may not be able to go, for various reasons.

Hope your DD makes a swift recovery flowers

honeyroar Tue 28-Mar-17 10:47:26

His niece is ill in hospital and he's still fussing about his wedding and stressing the parents out at a time when they probably need support. He should be bloody ashamed of himself. I can understand him being disappointed, but he should understand and be sympathetic. Nobody cancels a trip to Australia for nothing!

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