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To not want DH to buy this?

(108 Posts)
Babypassport Mon 27-Mar-17 07:16:22

DH got 2k bonus at work this month (hurrah!). At the weekend he bought me the most beautiful handbag for £600, by far my most expensive handbag and one I will probably use a lot.

He wants to spend the rest of the bonus on a Macbook, as he works in IT and is increasingly having to deal with Macbook related issues, so he would like to fiddle with one to get properly to grips with it.

It wouldn't be his main computer, he already has a very nice PC laptop, a desktop and a tablet. Also, I will be back at work from mat leave in a few months and will get my work Macbook back, so he would be able to play with that as much as he wants.

So the question is, AIBU and hypocritical to not want him to have his toy after he bought me my own toy? It just seems like a waste of money for something he will play with and then probably discard until it is obsolete, but then isn't a nice handbag just as wasteful?

ShowMePotatoSalad Mon 27-Mar-17 07:19:30

Sorry OP YABU. Even if it was just a toy YWBBU, but you said yourself it's for work! Which makes you doubly unreasonable IMO.

FacelikeaBagofHammers Mon 27-Mar-17 07:19:31

Ah here! He was very generous spending that huge chunk of money on a bag for you!

Let him spend the rest his he pleases ....unless of course you're struggling for cash for the essentials. Then you'd have to return your bag too ;)

MirandaWest Mon 27-Mar-17 07:19:55

Is it an issue of buying a MacBook at all, or spending the rest of the money on one? What would happen to the money if he didn't spend it on one?

Could he buy a second hand one or does he really yearn after a new one?

Guitargirl Mon 27-Mar-17 07:22:09

Unless you need that cash for essential stuff as a family then I don't think you can claim the mac is a waste of money - unless you want to return your handbag!

RainbowsAndUnicorn Mon 27-Mar-17 07:23:05

He should be able to buy what he likes with his bonus, he's the one that earned it.

I'd be returning your gift if it were me if you told me I couldn't buy myself something with my own money.

VivienneWestwoodsKnickers Mon 27-Mar-17 07:23:06

Massively unreasonable on your part. It's his money.

luckylucky24 Mon 27-Mar-17 07:25:01

If he doesn't actually want the laptop long term then suggest he buys a second hand one so he doesn't blow the lot. I think that is a very reasonable compromise. If he actually wanted the mac for use then I would say YABU.

NapQueen Mon 27-Mar-17 07:25:11

Yabu. There is nothing more frivolous than an expensive designer handbag. Its a piece of material with a handle that holds all your crap.

FiveGoMadInDorset Mon 27-Mar-17 07:27:04


ThroughThickAndThin01 Mon 27-Mar-17 07:27:07

You are very unreasonable.

MumoftheBoyandtheGirl Mon 27-Mar-17 07:27:37

What do you want him to spend it on?

Fairylea Mon 27-Mar-17 07:27:43

Yabu. If you're both spending the bonus on frivolous stuff rather than something you need (like house repairs etc) then he should be able to buy whatever he likes.

icelollycraving Mon 27-Mar-17 07:28:03

Yabu. If he's bought you a bag with almost a third of the money then he can treat himself too! If your family need the money,return the bag too.

beanzie99 Mon 27-Mar-17 07:30:03

I would expect the bonus to be shared 50:50 along with the rest of family money...

MeNeedSleep Mon 27-Mar-17 07:30:53

Buying a bag for £600 is the biggest way of wasting money short of throwing it off a bridge. Yabvu

YouTheCat Mon 27-Mar-17 07:31:39

He buys you a bag for £600 which is almost my monthly wage and you're objecting to him buying something that he can use for work with his own bonus?

YABU. Massively.

HiMyNameIsUnknown Mon 27-Mar-17 07:33:34

YABVU. He's spending it on luxury items and has bought you something.
It's to help him for work.

If you have a work laptop surely it's a condition no-one else has access to it? In my work letting someone "fiddle" with a work laptop would be a sackable offence as you are responsible for the security and safety of it

MarsInScorpio Mon 27-Mar-17 07:35:42

As he works in IT and only wants a Mac to become knowledgeable with OSx, he should know that he could build a hackintosh in an evening for a fraction of the cost.

He is unreasonable for wanting a Mac (I have one for work and hate it).

You are unreasonable for telling him how he can spend his money, especially after buying you such a generous gift.

Trills Mon 27-Mar-17 07:37:08

I also would expect you to both get equal benefit from the bonus - either using it to buy something you both enjoy, or splitting it 50:50.

BUT his is not just a toy, it will help him do his job better.

So he is not being unreasonable to think this is a good idea.

OnionKnight Mon 27-Mar-17 07:40:08

YABU, he's buying it to help further himself at work.

You can't moan unless you ask him to return your handbag.

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Mon 27-Mar-17 07:41:49

He will find it frustrating to fiddle with..
But that's must a Mac thing...

rollonthesummer Mon 27-Mar-17 07:47:21

If you are that bothered about the money-return the handbag and he can use that cash.

Presumably he doesn't need to spend the whole £1400 on a Mac just to fiddle around with? Second hand?

highinthesky Mon 27-Mar-17 07:48:55


Although if I was on mat leave, all spare money would go into a rainy day fund.

Pencilvester Mon 27-Mar-17 07:51:44

YABU. It's ok for him to spend SIX HUNDRED POUNDS on a handbag for you, but you object to him buying a laptop for himself? This can't possibly be real.

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