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AIBU?

Aibu to find this odd?

23 replies

witchkat72 · 24/03/2017 17:29

Men sending each other porn clips in messages? That's it really, my oh gets WhatsApp messages from his friends with porn clips, apparently according to him it's quite normal Hmm

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ZilphasHatpin · 24/03/2017 17:31

Yeah I've seen this. Immature men do it and giggle over them together. I was in a mature student class a few years ago of mostly men and quite a few of them did this between each other. Didn't hide it either.

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NC543212345 · 24/03/2017 17:31

You've just reminded me that dh used to get them when we first started dating Confused bloody weird if you ask me.

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Bitchfromhell · 24/03/2017 17:31

Not normal round these parts. In fact, I'm not sure I'd be sticking around in that relationship personally.

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Kitsandkids · 24/03/2017 17:32

I can imagine teenage lads sending them on to each other but I can't imagine my late 30s husband and his friends doing it and would think it odd and inappropriate if they did!

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Clandestino · 24/03/2017 17:33

I would give a bollocking to any of my colleagues if they did this and I'd knew. Because it's childish and disrespectful to their partners (only one is single). And I would defo kill my DH. No excuse for that.

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pissedlady · 24/03/2017 17:35

Not normal

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WarwickDavisAsPlates · 24/03/2017 17:36

This is exactly why my DH left his "lads" group chat. Apparently that's really all it seemed to be used for.

In the one on one chats they don't do it though so I'm not sure if it was some kind of silly showing off type thing.

Either way I'd think as a group of men in their late 20's, all of whom have had actual sex, the novelty of giggling over a willy/boobs/ whatever would have worn off a long time ago.

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CoolCarrie · 24/03/2017 17:36

Definitely odd

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VestalVirgin · 24/03/2017 17:44

Are you okay with him watching porn?

It is normal if one is friends with men who watch porn, I suppose.

People sending each other pictures that they think the other person will be interested in is normal.

If your oh claims to not watch porn and not be interested in porn, then he probably lies about it.

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AlmaMartyr · 24/03/2017 17:46

I don't know any men who do this.

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NC543212345 · 24/03/2017 17:47

AlmaMartyr you don't know any men who admit to doing this..

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witsender · 24/03/2017 17:50

I don't know anyone who does this. I wouldn't count many as friends if they did either.

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ThePants999 · 24/03/2017 17:50

It is normal if one is friends with men who watch porn, I suppose.

Altogether too many words there. The first three were all you needed.

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Brightredpencil · 24/03/2017 17:52

I dont get why men do this? Surely the point of porn is to become aroused? Why would men want to do that in the company of other men? (Unless they are seeking a sexual relationship with those men?!). I once knew a man who did this - I always thought it was a very homoerotic thing to do and felt ewww because he was related to the person he used to send the messages to...

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ThePants999 · 24/03/2017 17:52

Wait, I think I misunderstood VestalVirgin's post. Watching porn is normal. Sharing it is not, IMO.

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witchkat72 · 24/03/2017 18:14

Oh is receiving them from a friend who is single, oh has obviously told me for me to know in first place. He just deletes them but I asked him if this was normal behaviour, he said when he was younger and single yes but now he's older and married no not for him. He works in a garage so alot of the youngsters share clips. I just thought it was odd

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witchkat72 · 24/03/2017 18:16

Brightred I totally agree, why would men send men porn when the idea of porn is to arouse? Maybe my oh has an admirer?!

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ZilphasHatpin · 24/03/2017 18:39

I don't think watching porn is normal. I don't watch it. None of my friends watch it.

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VestalVirgin · 25/03/2017 18:46

I dont get why men do this? Surely the point of porn is to become aroused? Why would men want to do that in the company of other men?

They bond over the exploitation and humiliation of women. I once read a really interesting essay on this, can't remember where, though.

Watching porn is normal. Sharing it is not, IMO.

Why would watching it be normal, but sharing it be not normal? They have to get it somewhere if they want to watch it, don't they? Either they share with friends, or with anonymous strangers. Is it more normal if they pay for the porn they are given by other men?

Perhaps men watching porn with other men makes you uncomfortable, because you get the feeling that they bond over it ... you deny that they bond over the violence against women, but what else would it be?

Do you also consider it unnormal for women to recommend erotic literature or smutty romance novels to each other? Quite a lot of women must be doing it, judging from the success of Fifty Shades of Grey.
And if you consider it normal, why? According to your theory, it is all just innnocent fun, so there should be no difference, right?

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yayforsummer · 25/03/2017 19:23

It's just stupid dick head immature blokes trying to make their mates think they are funny
My dh gets and I'm sure sends them also
Like I said... dick heads

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shockshockhorror · 25/03/2017 19:51

Eww.

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happymumof4crazykids · 25/03/2017 19:54

You are not bu I hate stuff like this I'm open minded me and oh watch porn but I hate the fact his one mate used to do this. He was single and also used to forward pics off women he was messaging too. Confused

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EatsLeavesAndShit · 25/03/2017 19:54

One of my colleagues told me he has one friend in his 'lads' (men in their 50s) WhatsApp group who sends clips like this. All the other participants in the group think the sender is a sad loser.

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