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To ba absolutely nervous....

(39 Posts)
UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 06:38:21

Long story short, meeting with a few mums from school today, one of them arranged a coffee morning and I received and invite, normally I would kindly refuse, make up some excuse. Wish I had now my anxiety is through the roof!
AIBU in making myself go, by the sounds of it there is the host, me and 2 other mums and a couple of kiddies, I'm so nervous blush

YouMeddlingKids Fri 24-Mar-17 06:40:42

You totally should go! They've invited you so they obviously want you there, and nothing genuinely awful is going to happen. Just stay an hour or two and then go home and give yourself a huge pat on the back for feeling the fear and doing it anyway 😁

T00much Fri 24-Mar-17 06:41:43

Just do it. You will feel so proud of yourself afterwards. Enjoy!

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 06:46:09

I will! Thank guys, I'm such an overthinker on the way home no doubt I will be replaying conversations in my mind eeeek!

Is it too early smilefor Dutch courage haha wine

MrsELM21 Fri 24-Mar-17 06:46:48

Go!! They wouldn't have invited you if they didn't want you there, if you're uncomfortable you can always politely say you have to do something and go but you won't, be brave and let us know how you get on!

JennaRainbow Fri 24-Mar-17 06:48:45

Do it! But stop second guessing yourself! I am naturally a very shy person but I think it's as important for my kids to see me being social as it is for myself. They learn from us about making friends and about social interaction after all! Have a great time!

bigchris Fri 24-Mar-17 06:49:21

Definitely go
Plansomething tonight to reward yourself like wine and takeaway !
It might be the start of a friendship !
Plus update us so we can tell you how awesome you were for going

coffeetasteslikeshit Fri 24-Mar-17 06:53:48

Definitely feel the fear and do it anyway! Honestly OP, I used to be so shy, but from about the age of 20 I was so fed up of it that I started to deliberately put myself in situations out of my comfort zone and gradually I no longer felt the fear (well, not to a crippling extent anyway!). There's a lot to be said for faking it till you make it.

I can also recommend the book "women who think too much" if you're an over thinker, which I was/am too.

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 06:57:08

Ok, so I'm definitely going.... My support is my beautiful 1 year old, who will gladly take all the attention...

Away from me haha halo

I'll report back later. biscuitbrew

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 06:59:15

Thank you coffee ill have a look out for that, ive started a home psychology course, to hopefully help me see or think about things differently...

Give me a year or so.....

coffeetasteslikeshit Fri 24-Mar-17 07:02:14

Nice one Unicorn, and yes, it takes time but it's worth the initial discomfort. No one who meets me now ever believes that I used to be so shy grin

Absolutely go. About a year and a half ago I got chatting to a group of mums at school because we had the same wait between infants and older ones getting out. We all kind of knew each other but they knew each other better and got invited along to a coffee morning. I usually did everything in my power to not do these things because of anxiety but once I decided to just go.
Now I have a great bunch of friends we can call on each other to do pick ups if we are running late, we meet up in the holidays with all the kids and one turned up on my doorstep with a fantastic birthday cake she had made me 2 weeks ago.

WateryTart Fri 24-Mar-17 07:09:38

People often love talking about themselves. Ask a few questions and sit back and relax.

Wellitwouldbenice Fri 24-Mar-17 07:11:31

Definitely go. Focus on what you have in common I.e. Your children. If it helps, have some ideas for conversations prepared. That's what I do in these situations. Good luck!

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 07:43:55

Thank you for all your stories and advice. Ive taken it all in. I have to leave in 20 minutes shock

To top of all my nerves the police turned up 10 minutes ago, banging on the door and window looking for the previous tenant! Who is still giving this address apparently.

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 07:46:51

looksbetter I have seen these mums talking a few times, I did go to a whole class invited party of the hosting mums DD, the hosting mum was lovely and I saw she managed to speak to all of the guests (there were quite a few, to say)

Deathraystare Fri 24-Mar-17 08:53:40

Let us know how you get on and whether or not they are serial killers/chainsaw toting zombies or not! (just joking!)

JennaRainbow Fri 24-Mar-17 09:01:16

Have a really lovely time! And yes please do report back.

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 12:12:14


It went great! I'm still breathing and no cults were mentioned wink

On the way home I managed to clear my mind and not once did I second guess myself about anything I said, there were only 4 of us, one older one I know a little better, the hosting mum who was lovely and another mum with a newborn to get broody over! My one year old kept me occupied trying to discover everything, because thats not mummies tv remote, and I'm just going to empty my snack all over the ladies rug mummy halo

Hosting mum says we'll do it a couple of times a month. Actually feel a little liberated haha, I'm not a freak! Outside anyway.... 😌

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 12:18:34

There was also no mind of my daughter arriving ready to infect everyone with her germs, I did mention before we got there she's having a green nose day grin

UnicornsAreReal666 Fri 24-Mar-17 12:22:54

Is this ok to send...

Thanks again for the coffee, chat and Her DD name choco bites 😋. Was lovely to meet you properly. Hope I wasn't too much of a weirdo lol xx

Sunnysky2016 Fri 24-Mar-17 12:27:01

Miss out the weirdo but and add would like to do it again. Well done you

Sunnysky2016 Fri 24-Mar-17 12:27:15

But it not but

Sunnysky2016 Fri 24-Mar-17 12:27:40

Third time lucky weirdo bit not but grrrrrrrr

FumBluff1 Fri 24-Mar-17 12:30:03

Leave out the weirdo bit

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