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...to think the tick tock of the biological clock is a real thing?

(78 Posts)
DerFlabberghast Tue 21-Mar-17 18:51:35

I'm in my early thirties and have never been maternal, I dont feel the need to breed and have always been happy with my decision, in the last few months though my ovaries have been raising a disapproving fallopian brow and seem to be trying to remind me that's time's running out, a bit like an interfering elderly lady at church asking you if you've got a boyfriend yet over tepid post-sermon nescafe.

I have the nurturing instinct of a concrete floor so I can only assume the biological clock is a real thing. I've even dreamed about children recently and woke up a bit gutted I'd never hold my own newborn...it's as though my uterus has grabbed a couple of glittery pom poms and is dancing up and down shouting 'Bitch i'm here!'

Nothing else about me has changed, is this actually normal?

DerFlabberghast Tue 21-Mar-17 18:52:48

And I post this here because I've read before that assuming the biological clock is real and impacts your emotions and stuff is reductionist and offensive to women confused

BarbarianMum Tue 21-Mar-17 18:56:41

In my experience, yes. Ds1 was conceived as the result of a logical decision- making process. I adored him once he was born but until then he was very much a thought through decision. 2 years later ds2 was conceived in a haze of broody hormones that failed to go away for years and years (even though dh drew the line at more than 2).

All of caution is that your uterus has shot for brains and you don't have to listen to it if you don't otherwise want children/more children.

BarbarianMum Tue 21-Mar-17 18:57:25

All I'd caution
shit for brains

MrsHandles Tue 21-Mar-17 19:07:32

Oh it definitely is a real thing in my opinion. Last January my ovaries started screaming at me that they were very much there and not being used! Funnily enough, I also turned 30 last April and I believe that has had a lot to do with it - 30 and childless. I turn 31 this year and I'm still childless (even though DH and I are trying) my nether regions are STILL tick-tocking very loudly indeed.

OhPuddleducks Tue 21-Mar-17 19:12:00

It was for me. my reaction to crying children went from thinking "shut the fuck up" to "oh dear, someone's having a bad day" overnight. And shortly after I suddenly felt "ready" to have a baby. But I think it's probably different strokes for different folks.

Eolian Tue 21-Mar-17 19:13:00

Of course it's real. After all, the desire to have sex at all is driven by the need to procreate, however much humans have built it into a much more complex thing.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Tue 21-Mar-17 19:14:47

I think so. With me. One minute I wasn't interested in looking at, hearing about, seeing any babies. The next minute it was all I could think about. At aged 30.

Wellitwouldbenice Tue 21-Mar-17 19:17:01

Nope, not for me at all.

DangerousBeanz Tue 21-Mar-17 19:19:52

Yep it was real for me. Having has DS at 21 and being absolutely determined that that was it, he was going to be an only child, no more children ever ever ever, at about 35 the need for another baby came along. 4 years and 3 kittens (a distraction technique enployed by my DP that failed) later it was screaming at me. Hence DD and an 18.3 year age gap between my 2 children.

Areyoufree Tue 21-Mar-17 19:20:06

True for me too. One day I didn't want to have children, the next it was all I could think about. My biological clock is telling me to have more, but I am not listening. Sticks fingers in ears La la la la la!

thecolonelbumminganugget Tue 21-Mar-17 19:23:41

Mind ticked briefly for about 6 months in my early 30s. 35 now and I think it must have been wind, whatever it was soon fucked off again. Have you tried going to the pub and waiting for it to blow over? grin

Mrsfrumble Tue 21-Mar-17 19:49:17

I was hit by a sudden and overwhelming urge to have babies at the age of 30, despite having had several pregnancy scares in my late 20s where terror and dread turned to pure relief. Then suddenly my biggest fear wasn't that I WOULD get pregnant, but that I WOULDN'T!

I had DS at 32 and DD at 34, then at 37 was hit by another tidal wave of broodiness, which I think may have been my biological clock running down and telling me this was my last chance. DH and I had already decided that we were done, so I endured a few months of hopeless yearning and then the urge disappeared as suddenly as it had hit.

Now at 38 all I feel is relief that I don't have to go through pregnancy / birth / baby / toddler stage again so maybe my clock has stocked ticking?

Trills Tue 21-Mar-17 19:56:05

I wouldn't ever say "what you feel is not real"

I would object to you claiming that I must feel it some day, or some other nonsense that tends to be spouted when people talk about biological clocks or getting broody.

I might also object to the suggestion that this is a feeling that I should act upon, were I to feel it.

If I do start to feel it, I plan to go to a pub and wait for it to blow over as thecolonel suggests.

DerFlabberghast Tue 21-Mar-17 20:05:30

I wouldn't say that to anyone else but thats just the thing trills whenever people said 'ooh you'll feel it one day' I'd always be like 'oh knob off mate' and now I actually do, bugger 😂

CharlieChopstix Tue 21-Mar-17 20:09:06

Shame Trills. You'd make an excellent parent

grin

Trills Tue 21-Mar-17 20:19:30

'oh knob off mate' grin

TheABC Tue 21-Mar-17 20:25:53

A word of caution. I got broody, went to the pub and jumped on DH. As a result, I am typing this whilst breastfeeding DD to sleep.

Bloody sneaky uterus!

SleepFreeZone Tue 21-Mar-17 20:29:31

It's a weird thing as I didn't want children until my sister started her family. I thought we were both going to be childless then suddenly she hit forty and produced two children! My uterus went ballistic and before you know it I'd found a man and produced two kids too! Bonkers.

DerFlabberghast Tue 21-Mar-17 21:32:56

Lol only 7 months into sobriety so waiting for it to blow over down the local definitely isn't an option! grin

I 100% know I'm romanticising it all but my uterus is not interested in the 'would you like to spend the next twenty years in thankless manual labour? Try parenthood' bit just in the 'babies babies so soft tiny creature babies babies'

Make it stop 😂

PageNowFoundFileUnderSpartacus Tue 21-Mar-17 21:35:54

I'm late 40s and I think the spring must have fallen out of my biological clock when it was fitted, as it has never ticked or tocked.

GoodnightSeattle Tue 21-Mar-17 21:46:39

Absolutely it's real. It's built into every animal to reproduce at all costs.

IMO it's a very brave person who gambles on the fact that they will NEVER develop any feelings of regret when their biological clock kicks in. I've known a few people who have been as you've described in your OP their entire lives up until menopause. The sudden realisation that no, they really will never have their own child, has caused grief they never could have imagined they'd ever feel over the subject.

Of course I'm not saying it's a reason to procreate, the possibility that you might regret it later. Just that that risk exists. I admire people who have courage in their convictions and remain childless.

Glitteryfrog Tue 21-Mar-17 21:48:28

Nope.
Mid 30s, about to get married, lots of babies to cuddle in my friendship group.
Do i want one of my own... To have permanently...To take home.

Absolutely no fucking chance.

Knifegrinder Tue 21-Mar-17 23:55:23

Mine must have had its batteries left out. I've never had a moment's broodiness in my life.

SugarLoveHeart Wed 22-Mar-17 00:03:27

I got the message loud & clear from body at about 32. My brain, however, didn't get the memo. Now I'm over 40 & in the last chance saloon...

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