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To now have stuck up for myself more?

(16 Posts)
justcurious40 Tue 21-Mar-17 16:23:09

Hello. I'm afraid this is a sort of parking one, but I don't have diagrams!

I went out this morning with my 4 kids to a local farm attraction that we have season tickets for. I pulled into an empty space in the car park next to a family who were getting pushchairs etc out of the boot. The spaces are not marked, but it was a regular sized space and I was able to get out of my car with the door almost fully open.

As I was walking round to let my kids out, the woman from the car next to me blocked my way and yelled "Hey! We've got kids to get out the car 'ere! You just squeezed in!"

I said "Oh, I'm sorry. I hadn't realised it was so tight" and then got back in the car and drove to a space at the other end of the car park.

I then spent the next 3 hours at the place trying to avoid that family (unrelated to this thread but they were a bloody nightmare, yelling at their 18 month old and 22 month old kids and saying "You're showin' me up with your cryin'" etc!).

Now I feel annoyed that I didn't stick up for myself a bit more. Even if they needed a bit more space surely they could have asked more politely? I wish I had said "Yes, okay, I'll move, but did you really have to be so rude?" or something similar. But then I think maybe that's sinking to their level and I handled it right by not letting them get a rise out of me. Bear in mind my 4 kids were with me, so I didn't want a huge shouting match! But I also don't want my kids to think it's okay to let people walk all over you and be mean.

What do you think? How would you handle something like this?

justcurious40 Tue 21-Mar-17 16:29:47

Sorry, thread title should have been "To not have stuck up for myself more." I blame them for getting under my skin - I was too angry to type straight!

IamFriedSpam Tue 21-Mar-17 16:45:32

You're like me, I always back down silently teeth about it later, dreaming up exactly what I should have said. Still at least you didn't get to an altercation you took the high road!

I am interested in how they manage to have kids who are 18 months and 22 months though!

Nandocushion Tue 21-Mar-17 16:45:58

Not sure that saying what you suggest would have been sticking up for yourself at all tbh. Saying instead briskly, "Yes, I've got kids too, there's enough room for everyone" or something like that and then ignoring them would have been more forceful and not aggressive. Only you can say though if you think they would have pushed it.

Derlei Tue 21-Mar-17 16:47:24

How did you know how old the kids were?

Meh, saying something was probably more hassle than it's worth. She sounds gobby and it would have ruined your time at the farm

justcurious40 Tue 21-Mar-17 16:51:31

I know how old the kids are because the staff at the entrance ask so that they can put name badges and ages on the kids.

There were 3 grown ups with them - a woman who appeared to be mum of one of the kids, and then what looked to be her own mum and dad. Maybe the other kid was another grandkid.

justcurious40 Tue 21-Mar-17 16:53:57

Derlei - the problem is that it did ruin my time at the farm because I was seething and having to avoid them in case I ended up saying something about it, which is arguably more aggressive than just tackling it at the time. I just wish I'd had my wits about me to say something cutting...but then I wonder if saying nothing is better. Bloody annoying rude people!

MaidOfStars Tue 21-Mar-17 17:07:16

I am very intrigued at your application of accent onto what the woman said. I don't know why you'd do this well, I do, and I don't really like it

I wouldn't have moved my car. I would have shown her there was sufficient room. And I certainyl wouldn't have avoided her around the park.

justcurious40 Tue 21-Mar-17 17:08:53

It's not an application of an accent. It's just showing how she spoke. That could be any accent you like.

MaidOfStars Tue 21-Mar-17 17:10:08

Why? Why not just type it in your English?

justcurious40 Tue 21-Mar-17 17:10:17

Well, not any accent, but this is not a regional thing if that's what you're getting at. The fact of the matter is that she was pretty rough around the edges, yes.

ZilphasHatpin Tue 21-Mar-17 17:12:27

Well I've got a right arse on ATM so feel free to ignore but I'd either have responded to her with a hmm face and carried on getting my kids out of the car or I'd have said "and??" Along with hmm face and carried on getting my kids out of the car. Either way I wouldn't have moved and she wouldn't have been happy. I have very few fucks to spare for that though.

Janey50 Tue 21-Mar-17 17:12:37

I did wonder how they managed to have kids that were only 4 months apart in age!

justcurious40 Tue 21-Mar-17 17:12:45

MaidOfStars - does it really matter? I am not going to get bogged down in justifying how I wrote it. I wrote it how it sounded, that's all. I am not being a snob or whatever it is you are implying.

FloatyCat Tue 21-Mar-17 17:18:20

Not really, but you could have added something like 'thought there was plenty of room' and then moved, but realistically it could have escalated into a slanging match and could you really be bothered? Forget about it smile

ZilphasHatpin Tue 21-Mar-17 17:21:57

you could have added something like 'thought there was plenty of room'

My version: "don't be ridiculous, there's plenty of room, behave yourself" grin <but only if you can run fast>

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