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AIBU to expect 8-year-old to get herself ready...

(12 Posts)
HereWeGoRound Tue 21-Mar-17 15:11:48

..on a school morning without having to be yelled at before she'll actually do anything? I mean, even if she brushed her hair, or washed her face, or packed her bag, or got her cereal, or brushed her teeth? Even just one of these things? The only thing she does without being asked is going to the loo. She just sits round doing nothing, waiting to be told what to do..but then procrastinates and only really does anything on the third time of being asked, by which point I'm yelling, as we're going to be late.
AIBU or is this typical of 8-year-olds?

itstheyearzero Tue 21-Mar-17 15:14:16

My DS is 8 and is exactly the same. It makes the morning so stressful confused

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Tue 21-Mar-17 15:16:43

Ask her write a check list of what needs to be done every morning and tick off when done.
And no TV before school if she is easily distracted. .

Whatthefreakinwhatnow Tue 21-Mar-17 15:17:40

She is definitely capable of doing it! My DD went through a phase of not wanting to do this stuff and mornings were mega stressful- I now get her up an hour earlier so she has plenty of time grin

She gets up and showers, brings everything for school down, packs her lunch, makes her breakfast and does her own hair. Mostly without moaning now but it took a while!

HereWeGoRound Tue 21-Mar-17 15:17:47

Glad it's not just us..sorry! Very stressful and infuriating. I end up giving her a lecture on the way to school explaining how even just doing one thing without being asked would be a great help. I am running around after a toddler as well...though it feels like they are both toddlers at times!

HereWeGoRound Tue 21-Mar-17 15:21:04

We don't have tv on in the mornings at all but she's distracted by anything and everything....a crumb on the floor...the toddler's toys....or she'll sit and stare into space just waiting for me to give an instruction.

Wando1986 Tue 21-Mar-17 15:25:46

So make her 'instruction' to do everything on her 'get ready in the morning' checklist... that you need to print off once and laminate.

hmm

BikeRunSki Tue 21-Mar-17 16:01:48

8 yo DS is exactly to same, and also extremly reluctant to get out of bed.
His 5 yo sister is fine though.

JennyOnAPlate Tue 21-Mar-17 16:07:25

Can she tell the time? Even if she can't you can point out where the hands on the clock are when it's time to get dressed etc?

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 21-Mar-17 16:14:12

Check list. One word prompts: "Teeth"

If it is generally about attention, that is who she is and you have to work with it, not against it. DD has ADHD so on the extreme end of distractable and I can get her out the door. Combination of bribery (she gets TV if she gets ready early), consequences (I will send her to school in PJs and explain to her teacher if necessary) and 'noticing' desirable behaviour ("you cleared your plate without being asked, DD"). She's 6 and pretty good now.

Things that don't work when you have a distractable child: Lecturing; long explanations or requests; lists of demands; nagging; criticism.

chocolateneededplease Tue 21-Mar-17 16:18:48

My 11 yo is like this! It's infuriating. Whenever asked to get up, she asks for "5 more minutes" multiple times over and over.

Blueflowers2011 Tue 21-Mar-17 16:24:12

TV - an obvious one, not sure if you have your on in the mornings but i banned it in our house until they fully get ready and I sold it to them so they can have lots of playtime and do whatever they wanted in the time left instead.

For us for the first time ever, they are dressed 30 mins before we leave the house now, 3 months on. I am still waiting for the bubble to burst but it's still going strong...

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