Is this depression??

[Monkeyface45]

Posting here for traffic...I've never been officially depressed, so I'm not sure at what point you realise it's depression and go to the doctors instead of just feeling a bit low? I'm worried people will think differently of me once I've admitted I'm struggling as I am usually the backbone in any situation. The basic background to my feeling low is this... I know deep down I have married the wrong man, for many reasons I won't go into now, it makes me sad thinking this is the best my life is going to get. If I didn't have children I would 100 % leave but I really want to keep the family together for them.

I just have this general feeling of sadness deep in my stomach, the kids bring me joy daily but I can't shake this feeling. I'm managing to get up, stat upbeat, get dressed and do my make up etc. Daily tasks are maneagable but I just feel the inevitable will happen and we will seperate, I feel I'm swimming against the tide. I've been feeling like this on and off for months.

I guess I'm just looking for advice and opinions, and the fact I find it hard to talk to close family or friends.

[acquiescence]

Clinical symptoms of depression include things such as poor motivation, lack of interest in things you usually would be interested in, not enjoying usual activities, changes in appetite and sleep pattern, feeling hopeless, sad, worthless, not attending to self care. Depression is categorised as mild, moderate, severe and only moderate and severe tend to see an improvement with antidepressants. Mild depression can still affect your life and can be helped with some basic talking therapy (available through IAPT at your GP).

I work with parents with mental health problems. If you came to me with your situation I would be inclined to think this general feeling of sadness is to do with your feeling of marrying the wrong man and feeling like your life isn't 'right' rather than a diagnosable depressive illness. However it is still worth talking to your GP. And/or thinking about changing the things that are making you feel sad. Good luck.

[Sonders]

From your description it's not clear, but you should look into the test PHQ-9, it's the one your GP would probably use to diagnose depression:

www.phqscreeners.com/sites/g/files/g10016261/f/201412/PHQ-9_English.pdf

If you're not ready to go to a Doctor yet, print out a few copies and do one a week, that way you can see if there is a pattern.

Even with a diagnosis, it won't immediately fix everything. If your depression is the result of your environment, that's what you need to change.