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AIBU re house guests

(31 Posts)
Vansandtracksandlego Mon 20-Mar-17 11:55:38

If you stay as a guest at someone's house for the weekend, what time would you get up? And be ready to leave the house by? Assuming you'd just planned to spend the day together and didn't have any firm plans that required being at a specific place at a specific time.

My guest this weekend got up at 9.30 BUT then wasn't ready to leave the house until 2pm. I'd been up since 7.30am and ready by 8.30am.

AIBU for not wanting to spend my weekend waiting for guests to have looonnng baths, paint their nails, blow dry their hair?

If I'd known they would take that long I would've gone out - I could've got in a nice long dog walk & done my food shop in the time it took her to get ready ....


Waitingonasmile Mon 20-Mar-17 11:56:59

I would expect a guest to be up by 10 and ready to leave by 11-11.30. 2pm is ridiculous unless hungover.

Vansandtracksandlego Mon 20-Mar-17 11:57:43

Should point out that the previous night wasn't a late one - we went to the pub for a quick dinner and were in bed by 10.30pm

Tobuyornot99 Mon 20-Mar-17 11:57:53

People who take ages to get ready really annoy me, but I probably would have asked what time they'd like to go out, rather than just wait. It can't be that hard to say "will I walk the dog and nip to the shops, and we'll do something when I get back, or would you like to come, but we'll need to leave within the hour?".

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Mon 20-Mar-17 11:58:00

Sounds like she was using you for the venue not the company!!

Vansandtracksandlego Mon 20-Mar-17 11:58:05

No one was hungover

Vansandtracksandlego Mon 20-Mar-17 12:00:30

Yes Tobu I need to be firmer ......

dowhatnow Mon 20-Mar-17 12:00:50

Why didn't you ask her when she'd be ready?

Vansandtracksandlego Mon 20-Mar-17 12:03:50

Dowhatnow because it didn't occur to be it could take until mid-afternoon!

HollyBollyBooBoo Mon 20-Mar-17 12:04:03

Ridiculous time to be ready and really rude!

I had an Aunt that did this and would expect me to look after her early rising child. Then aunt would surface from her bedroom about one ish and want breakfast etc - we'd had breakfast and lunch by that time! After the second stay that she did this I never invited her again.

Next time go over (in a breezy manner) what the plans are for the next day?

Vansandtracksandlego Mon 20-Mar-17 12:04:06

*me not be

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut Mon 20-Mar-17 12:08:30

I think it entirely depends on what the plans were. If there was no discussion or agreement then yabu.

If the plan was you would be off out at 8.30am and this was communicated and agreed in abvance yanbu.

EineKleine Mon 20-Mar-17 12:28:42

Maybe she wouldn't have had a looong bath if she'd known you were waiting on her before walking the dog. I think you both need to talk more.

pointstaken Mon 20-Mar-17 12:29:20

As a guest, I would ask what the plans are for the following day!

I have friends who are in bed until at least 11am on their day off. I know they get up a bit earlier when we are around, but I wouldn't force them to get up at dawn.
I have other friends who are gone for a jog with the dogs by 6am.

I think 9 to 9:30 is a reasonable time to be ready. It depends what you mean by being ready: for my grand-mother, it would mean being showered/ dressed and having read all the guide books, have her lunch and make an itinerary, so 2pm for her is not unheard of!

Eatingcheeseontoast Mon 20-Mar-17 12:29:24

That would have driven me mad!

pointstaken Mon 20-Mar-17 12:30:09

I do think that it's rude to have a bath when you are a guest!

Bluntness100 Mon 20-Mar-17 12:32:46

I think you're being a bit unreasonable yes. If you have expectations for the day then discuss it the night before and agree plans.

They clearly didn't know you wished to go out in the morning and you clearly didn't know they wouldn't want to go out till the afternoon. So a lack of communication on both sides. Just agree in advance your plans for the day and then you can do whatever accordingly.

Gizmojo Mon 20-Mar-17 12:42:23

Bit hmm at the suggestion yabu - taking 4.5 hours to get up and ready for the day in someone else's house is taking the piss, whether there are agreed plans for the day or not. Unless, of course, you run a hotel?...

JonesyAndTheSalad Mon 20-Mar-17 12:44:30

Well you need to set things in place with people like that OP. Say "We'll head out at 11 shall we?" and then if they say "Oh no that's too early" you can say "Well meet me at 3 then" or whatever.

Helenluvsrob Mon 20-Mar-17 12:44:52

Why not communicate ?

WeAllHaveWings Mon 20-Mar-17 12:50:22

If we were expecting to go out I would have had a discussion the night before about when we would leave, I would have done this whether I was the guest or the host. Why didn't you just ask her?

Ohyesiam Mon 20-Mar-17 12:50:49

That would piss me right off. It's all about communication.

StudentMum92 Mon 20-Mar-17 12:55:06

Did your guest even know that you were planning to do something? If you didn't have any specific plans, the guest could have assumed you were just spending time together in the house.

People need to be more specific; "I'm not sure what to do tomorrow but shall be ready for 10 and see where the day takes us?"

HadrianHadALongWall23 Mon 20-Mar-17 12:57:31

Dont ever invite them to stay again, a relative has had terrible problems with other relatives staying and not getting up, expecting different food, wanting expensive takeaways, ruining items carelessly with their child...dont invite again...seriously :-)

EssentialHummus Mon 20-Mar-17 12:58:18

Did your guest even know that you were planning to do something? If you didn't have any specific plans, the guest could have assumed you were just spending time together in the house.

Exactly this.

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