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Gloomy, miserable, pessimistic, like fucking eeyore. And not in a nice way.

(14 Posts)
MOIST Mon 20-Mar-17 08:09:25

Me that is.

I am annoying myself by catastrophising and being gloomy about something that might not happen. Probably won't. But Im still all doom and gloom and anxious and drawling out. And I don't want to be. And if I'm annoying myself be being such a miserable baggage god only knows what other people think.

I want to be one of those always cheerful happy people who bounce around like a ray of fucking sunshine. And I'm not.

So how do I change my entire personality and stop annoying myself?

MOIST Mon 20-Mar-17 08:32:42

See. It's boring isn't it. And annoying.

flapjackfairy Mon 20-Mar-17 08:35:47

No idea but if you find out could you let me know please?

SootSprite Mon 20-Mar-17 08:36:14

Have you been feeling like this for a while? If so, it may be time to go and see your gp. Nobody is happy all of the time, often those cheerful happy bouncy tiggers get sad too.

MOIST Mon 20-Mar-17 08:38:28

I do tend to be a bit gloomy but I have a booob clinic appointment in a week that had sent me beyond my normal eeyore like gloominess

justmatureenough2bdad Mon 20-Mar-17 08:57:55

with things like this, it is so personal and difficult to make suggestions without sounding patronising or smug or such...

but a good start might be talking to your gp about the availability of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy in your area.

This is a good tool for understanding how, when and why you become anxious or stressed and how you can start addressing that. That may be by avoiding situations that cause these feelings or helping you to realise what you can do to mitigate the feelings. It may be considering things in terms of your "circle of influence".....(if you can do something about it, then it's in your circle and you take appropriate action)....if it's not something you can influence, then it's outside your circle and there is no point in worrying about it....)

with a boob clinic appointment, while not something i can specifically relate to, the point would be to say, "well, there is nothing i can do right now that will change what the outcome is, so don't stress about it. as and when the result comes, then i'll address it..."

TheSconeOfStone Mon 20-Mar-17 09:02:06

I feel the same and have done as far back as I can remember. It's got worse sinse my DD1 started school which has always been a problem. Diagnosed with ASD.

My self pity, jealousy of others and pessimism is really unpleasant. I don't know what the answer is but I need to make a change as well.

Hogterm Mon 20-Mar-17 09:04:51

I agree re cbt. In fact I was Googling last night on the NHS as am struggling a bit at the moment and hate going to the doctor so was trying to find ways to help myself (more positive outlook being something I think I need to do too) and they recommend a series of books called "overcoming". Not looked properly yet but there seemed to be lots of topics on the overcomingwebsite website so might be worth a look for you too.

VeryBitchyRestingFace Mon 20-Mar-17 09:07:45

I'm definitely of your persuasion OP and could probably do with being less pessimistic/cynical.

On the other hand though, this type of person

I want to be one of those always cheerful happy people who bounce around like a ray of fucking sunshine.

annoys the fuck out of me. Wonderful qualities in a 🐶, but rather get on my tits in an adult human being.

JamesDelaneysHat Mon 20-Mar-17 09:08:29

Sometimes it's OK to feel like this, it really is. I am eeyore-ish a lot of the time. Also not in a good way.

And it's especially OK when life throws shit at you like a boob clinic appointment.

I will never be one of the shiny happy people and I wouldn't want to be. However, I am reading a book about ACT which is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. The premis is that life throws fuck loads of shit at most people and you might react by becoming bitter and angry and down but that accepting that you'll have these thoughts and using a bit of mindfulness is better than trying to jolly yourself out of it, especially if that goes against your nature. It's a bit more complicated than that but that's the gist.

barefoofdoctor Mon 20-Mar-17 09:09:35

Medication is my secret!

Booshbeesh Mon 20-Mar-17 09:17:48

My partner was like this. I FORCED him every morning to wake up smile a massive smile and say "what an awesome day" at first he wasnt v impressed coz i badgered him. Then it turned into a joke. And honestly as stupid as it sounds it has made a HUGE difference because now we wake laughing!!!! And it kick starts the day.. try it.. xx

mimishimmi Tue 21-Mar-17 00:27:31

Same. I haven't resolved it. I guess it helps to remember that I am not doing the things I tend to catastrophise about (warcrimes). I am still terribly fearful.

SabineUndine Tue 21-Mar-17 01:07:23

Also an Eeyore but CBT helps. Try this technique: each night before you go to sleep, write down:
3 things you've done today that you're pleased with
3 personal qualities you've used today
3 things you can be grateful for today
3 good things that have happened.

They can be tiny things e.g. 'I caught the bus just in time this morning' but the idea is they focus your mind on positives. It really really works!

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