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To go to Texas for 10 days on my own?

(77 Posts)
FruitCider Sun 19-Mar-17 19:07:01

Background: I have "settled" status, due my parents claiming asylum in the uk. As a result of my countries history, my family are spread across the world.

One relative lives in Texas and has invited me over in the summer as other members of my family are travelling there. I actually have 2 weeks annual leave already. I started making travel plans and realised quickly my journey from start to finish will be around 18 hours. Therefore would need to go for a minimum of 9 days to spend a week there. All I would need to pay for is flights and dinner one evening. My family are very hospitable!

DP is becoming increasingly annoyed at my plans, as we have a 4 year old child together and "he will be stuck at home". He has been invited, but does not want to go. I don't feel able to take my 4 year old child on a 18 hour journey on my own.

I REALLY want to go. It is a bit like a family reunion, but in part of the world I've never been to. I've always wanted to go to America, DP has no interest whatsoever. He thinks I'm being vvvv unreasonable for even considering it.

AIBU to go to Texas for 10 days on my own?

Moanyoldcow Sun 19-Mar-17 19:11:52

Personally I'd take my 4 year old - why do you not feel able to take DC?

FruitCider Sun 19-Mar-17 19:17:14

I honestly think they wouldn't cope with the journey, and if they didn't cope I don't think I would! If they were a bit older, no problem at all. But I think I'm biting off more than I can chew travelling alone with a 4 year old.

highinthesky Sun 19-Mar-17 19:23:43

Go, take DC and enjoy. It's a big adventure!

I wouldn't worry about traveling with a 4 yo, he is very much a part of your family and will have a great time. Why shouldn't he meet his relatives? As you've been invited by family, it is really only the plane journey that will be unaccompanied, and DC will be asleep for much of that time. If worried, arrange to travel out with family too.

Let DP suffer his own miserable company for 10 days.

ScarletFever Sun 19-Mar-17 19:24:57

take the DC with you - you're a grown up - you can do this

Softkitty2 Sun 19-Mar-17 19:29:22

Take dc.. At 4 surely your dc can behave. Lots of movies in flight, books, crayons, sleep,.. Take an afternoon flight so by the time your dc is tired of watching or playing its their bedtime. When they wake, you have reached your destination.

If you really can't take dc go if you really want to. Your husband should be able to look after his child.

Derlei Sun 19-Mar-17 19:30:15

Take 4 year old OP it will be great. I know a couple who are currently travelling around the world with their recently turned 3 year old. He's been absolutely fine.

Invest in one of these to make the airport experience easier

Mouthfulofquiz Sun 19-Mar-17 19:32:25

As someone who has 3 small kids (I knows it's all relative though) taking a single 4 year old wouldn't be that hard at all unless they have some behavioural issues?

Llanali Sun 19-Mar-17 19:35:36

Unless your child has serious health issues, I'd just get on the plane and take them with me!
I've flown a lot with small people, including to New Zealand etc. plus you'll have plenty of willing volunteers when you get there! I'm sure they would love to meet your kid.

My mother who was disabled in a wheelchair managed to fly as the only adult to Hong Kong from Gatwick when I was 7weeks old, my sister was 6 and my brother 10!

MorrisZapp Sun 19-Mar-17 19:37:33

I've got a NT six year old and I wouldn't take him on any aeroplane on my own, far less to Texas. MN is full of amazing, capable women who can breeze through life with their small children laughing airily etc. I'd be brought to my knees by that kind of challenge but nobody else can tell you what you're comfortable with.

I've always wanted to shag a cowboy go to Texas.

BertrandRussell Sun 19-Mar-17 19:38:49

If you want to go by yourself then go.

But if you want you take your ds then of course you can!

BertrandRussell Sun 19-Mar-17 19:39:51

"I've got a NT six year old and I wouldn't take him on any aeroplane on my own, far less to Texas."

Why on earth not?

Plunkette Sun 19-Mar-17 19:41:52

My part of Texas is a lovely sunny 28 degrees today.

Just sayin...

IHaveBrilloHair Sun 19-Mar-17 19:43:05

Go, you'll manage.
I took my just turned 1yr old to Indonesia for a month on my own, and loved it so much we stayed two and a half months.

MorrisZapp Sun 19-Mar-17 19:45:53

Bertrand I don't find parenting easy. I feel really exposed for the crap, ineffectual fake of a mother that I think I am in situations that require my lively son to behave. The thought of dealing with entertaining him, grappling with luggage, food, delays, him wanting to kick the seat etc makes me want to sob.

We're not all the same.

Weedsnseeds1 Sun 19-Mar-17 19:48:19

Where are you starting from? It isn't normally 18 hours to Texas, unless you have a plane change en route for cost reasons, in which case I would suggest getting a big gap for the transit and booking a cheap hotel for proper sleep and food. Makes all the difference. If it's travel once off the plane, again, book somewhere at the airport and get your head down, or stop part way and take it easy. Perfectly doable with a child.

Weedsnseeds1 Sun 19-Mar-17 19:50:43

Mind you, with current USA travel restrictions, you may have a hold up depending where your family came from originally, or what visas you have in your passporthmm

brokenboobs Sun 19-Mar-17 19:54:35

You may want to google summer temps in the part of Texas you're planning to go to first.

FruitCider Sun 19-Mar-17 19:57:23

I have a UK passport, and I'm not Muslim so I think I will be ok on both accounts! Very sad that this is a concern of so many though.

FruitCider Sun 19-Mar-17 19:58:15

Oh, I'm starting a 2.5 hour drive from the airport, family live 2 hours from Houston. So it's 18 hours from leaving my house to arriving at theirs.

expatinscotland Sun 19-Mar-17 20:00:47

I'm from Texas and go there for a month every Summer now the kids are in school. Being doing that same ballache of a journey: Glasgow to Amsterdam (flight leaves at 6am so we have to be at check in for 4am) and then Amsterdam to Houston. It's a fucking bitch. If I could go alone, I'd do it! Fuck all this, 'You have to take your DC! I take my litter of 8 to Western Australia every month and it's fine.' Good for you then!

I'd go alone.

It's telling so many women are saying you have to take your child, but no one's first question was, 'Why the hell can't his father look after him for 10 days?' Sexism is alive and well!

expatinscotland Sun 19-Mar-17 20:04:14

Oh, yeah, it's easily 18 hours with checking in 2 hours early, stopovers, getting your bags and waiting through immigration. And you can't park near the airport in Houston so if someone cannot come round you have to walk out to the garage. We start at 3am in Glasgow, getting a hotel the night before as we live in West Scotland and land in Houston at 1pm their time. My folks live fairly centrally and it STILL takes about an hour to get from the airport to theirs.

MorrisZapp Sun 19-Mar-17 20:05:32

Totally agree expat. Mothers! Do better!

expatinscotland Sun 19-Mar-17 20:07:25

Oh, and the route back, it is always an overnight flight. Utter bullshit kids all sleep on planes. NONE of my 3 ever has bar a couple of hours kip at most. Even with Piriton. I feel rough as all fuck when we land in Amsterdam and then all the UK flights don't leave till afternoon so you sit there for 5 fucking hours. I'd be fucking skipping down the terminal if I could go alone.

FruitCider Sun 19-Mar-17 20:08:34

Ahhh thanks expat it's great to hear from someone that does the journey!

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