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How would you feel about an 18 year old going away with boyfriend?

(93 Posts)
cornwall1900 Sun 19-Mar-17 00:04:32

He is a year older and he kept him secret, even though I was suspicious where he kept going but didn't pry.
They've been seeing 8 months by then.

How would you feel about letting him go away abroad on holiday?
Paid for by his own money.
Although I did pay for his passport.
And he is legally an adult.

Boy sounds very nice from a good family and at uni.

GoodnightSeattle Sun 19-Mar-17 00:05:24

He's 18, it's not really up to you if he goes away now is it? hmm

TheOnlyColditz Sun 19-Mar-17 00:05:46


Kind of sad and nostalgic for my little boy. Probably feel a bit elderly too, having a grown up son doing grown up things.

noeffingidea Sun 19-Mar-17 00:06:44

I wouldn't particularly feel anything. Why would I?

WorraLiberty Sun 19-Mar-17 00:06:49

Well I think the question here is how do you feel?

What are your concerns?

mynameismelon Sun 19-Mar-17 00:06:51

He's an adult, there's nothing you can really do. I'd be fine with it, although safety precautions - emphasise him letting you know when they arrive/go anywhere far away from where they're staying/leave to fly home. Also get the other boy's phone number and details just in case of emergency. Tell them to have fun but that you care and want them to let you know they're okay.

Steamgirl Sun 19-Mar-17 00:07:24

As you said, he's an adult, they both are. What's the problem?

BlossomCat Sun 19-Mar-17 00:07:57

I'd ask if they were going to bring me back a stick of rock and send me a postcard.

He's an adult who's payed for his own holiday. I'd have a conversation about safe sex and responsible drinking, and let him go.

user1489189598 Sun 19-Mar-17 00:08:03

Sad, but I'd wish them a lovely time, ask for a postcard and give them spends.

When you love someone, you set them free!

blondehair Sun 19-Mar-17 00:10:03

I was 17 and my boyfriend was 20 the first time we went abroad on holiday. My mum wasn't so sure about letting me go because of the distance but I let her know I was fine every day and everything was okay x

IvyLeagueUnderTheSea Sun 19-Mar-17 00:10:12

He's 18, an adult. He can get married if he wants. A holiday is nothing.

ItsOooohSoQuiet Sun 19-Mar-17 00:12:57

He's 28. It's none of your business.

Finola1step Sun 19-Mar-17 00:13:15

He is 18. There isn't anymore to add.

ItsOooohSoQuiet Sun 19-Mar-17 00:13:25

*18, not 28. hmm

MommaGee Sun 19-Mar-17 00:14:41

"Let" him go?
Your son is an adult. Probably in a sexual relationship with his boyfriend. Old enough to move out and get married. I'm boot site you "let" them go away on a holiday their paying for themselves at that age.

It is harder if he's still in school and I'd be worried about it clashing with anything important but you still can't really stop him

BeachyKeen Sun 19-Mar-17 00:19:51

Mine was living with their boyfriend and paying their own way at that age. I'd let them get on with it, as they are adults now.

Partyfops Sun 19-Mar-17 00:28:19

I would feel happier with them being in a relationship. I went away when I was 17/18, I was single, 18/30 type holiday. Knowing what we got up to....,,,,shockshockshock

cerealnamechangers Sun 19-Mar-17 00:31:27

Why does it matter if he is from a good family or not? You can't pre judge an adult by their family.

Darlink Sun 19-Mar-17 00:32:14

I'd be a bit sad but keep it hidden

SealSong Sun 19-Mar-17 00:37:17

I'd be happy for him that he's met someone nice and is off having a fun time with him.

noeffingidea Sun 19-Mar-17 00:37:37

Why would you be sad Darlink ?

Darlink Sun 19-Mar-17 00:39:42

Because he's all grown up ! I'd also be a bit sad he'd kept the relationship a secret

PinkCrystal Sun 19-Mar-17 00:41:01

My 18 yo also going away I worry but wouldn't stop them as 18.

corythatwas Sun 19-Mar-17 00:58:31

18 is the age when they go off to uni anyway. Knowing what this town looks like during Freshers week, I am not sure I would be more worried about a holiday abroad with his boyfriend; sounds comparatively innocuous.

Historygirl97 Sun 19-Mar-17 01:19:38

He's 18! So it's not your decision. However, I'd be sitting down having a conversation how safe travelling, what to do if he gets into trouble, making sure he can contact you. I'd also chat about responsible drinking and practicing safe sex (worth noting condoms abroad may not be as 'safe' as U.K. Ones) x

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