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To be very worried about what maintenance i will get for my three pre school children?

(19 Posts)
ferriswheel Sat 18-Mar-17 13:05:09

I have three pre school children, the youngest is 19 months. My stbxh has his own business and pays himself a very small salary because he is also entitled to dividends to bulk out his (our) income. My understanding is that they wont be included in the calculation that is made about what maintenance he will have to pay me. Does anyone know? Im hoping to find out next week. Am in Scotland, if that makes a difference.

needsahalo Sat 18-Mar-17 13:49:57

You will need to ask for his dividend to be included. Expect years of hassle and do not rely on the money. The laws on self employment and child maintenance are a poor fit and there is little you will be able to do if he decides he doesn't want to pay.

LemonSqueezy0 Sat 18-Mar-17 17:02:52

Can you sort it out directly with him or are you expecting him to be difficult?

user1489855835 Sat 18-Mar-17 17:04:32

What about your earnings?

witsender Sat 18-Mar-17 17:05:59

Her earnings have nothing to do with maintenance.

If you have bank statements etc you could prove that over the last few years he has used dividends to prop up tbe income, if that helps.

JustMarriedBecca Sat 18-Mar-17 17:24:16

You might find this useful from a solicitors. You should check if it's up to date law

mayhemensues Sat 18-Mar-17 18:41:40

I am in a similar situation. My husband draws £3000 a year. If I follow through with the separation/ divorce I will have to accept that I will see very little sadangry

LemonSqueezy0 Sat 18-Mar-17 19:29:31

The OPs earnings are separate matter, obviously. Both parents should contribute to their joint children.

needsahalo Sat 18-Mar-17 19:36:32

What about your earnings?

Really? What the OP earns has fuck all to do with her ex's responsibility towards their children. Always the same old mysognistic shite.

TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder Sat 18-Mar-17 19:41:21

User can you explain why you feel that your question is relevant? Do you think that fathers are only obliged to contribute to their children's upbringing if their mother can't afford it? Is it primarily the mother's responsibility, with the father only expected to make up any shortfall?

RebootYourEngine Sat 18-Mar-17 19:47:17

Seriously User that is completely irrelevant.

As shit as it is i dont factor in maintenance into my budget because my exh doesnt think that he should pay for his ds so changes job every few months to avoid paying.

PigletWasPoohsFriend Sat 18-Mar-17 19:50:29

To be fair to user They may have been trying to see if OP is entitled to benefits etc.

Don't see the need to pounce on them tbh.

TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder Sat 18-Mar-17 20:02:21

Piglet if that's the case, then the relevant question is "are you entitled to benefits?". Not "what about your earnings?". Either way, that's still completely irrelevant when the OP is asking about her ex's financial responsibility, she isn't asking for opinions or advice on her own financial position.

It gets people's backs up because it's ​completely mysoginistic and, as always, perpetuates the idea that children are women's concern and responsibility, and we shouldn't put upon the poor men by expecting them to equally parent and provide for their offspring.

ferriswheel Sat 18-Mar-17 20:59:52

Yes I expect him to work. I have a full time permanent job on hold because I'm a sahm. I can't afford childcare if I go back to work.

Rainydayspending Sun 19-Mar-17 08:15:18

The benefits thing is equally the normal whinge card from feckless exes. "But the government gives you money for the kids". My ex was one of this number and made a report to dwp that I "wasn't declaring my income". Of course I was. But he did it everytime he didn't get his own way. Payments would sometimes be delayed, I filled in more paperwork etc. All a game to the average absconding parent. Meanwhile the children miss out on things.

Rainydayspending Sun 19-Mar-17 08:17:17

Sorry. Side tracked. Most self employed exes screw the kids over to save cash for themselves. Sorry op. It seems to be what exes are encouraged to do by friends/ websites in order to "punish" partners.

AyeAmarok Sun 19-Mar-17 08:22:09

Is your ex likely to think that paying maintenance is "giving you money" and so try to get away with as little as possible, rather than paying for his children?

contractor6 Sun 19-Mar-17 08:22:22

Not much help to you now, but for others who are having children with self employed, I request becoming a share holder. Especially a sahm as there are tax planning benefits. That way if split up, you'd have rights in regards to dividends. If partner doesn't trust that, put the shares in trust in Childs name, generally wouldn't have access to the monies until 18 though, but would at least make it fairer.

PhilODox Sun 19-Mar-17 08:26:33

Why will he not be having the children 50/50?

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