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To report a mum for smoking a joint on the school run? WWYD?

(140 Posts)
MAS7 Fri 17-Mar-17 20:58:13

This morning I dropped my DS at school, on the way back I was walking behind a mum whose daughter is in my sons class, she was smoking and pushing her DS (about 18 months) in his buggy. I thought it was just a cigarette (still wrong IMO) but she stopped at the bus stop and as I caught her up I stopped to say hello. It was obvious from the smell she was actually smoking a cannabis joint with her 18 month old sat there in his buggy.

She is really a nice person and does seem very nice with her kids, I know she has problems as she has told me before about a restraining order on her kids dad. I just couldn't help be worried about what her day at home would be like with her DS if she is already smoking cannabis at 9am. Am I making too much of a thing about it?

FruitCider Fri 17-Mar-17 20:59:39

No, you are not, although I'm sure many on here would disagree as "it's just a joint". I would consider doing a safeguarding referral, in the same way I would if someone was drunk at 9am with care of a small child.

zzzzz Fri 17-Mar-17 20:59:52

I would talk to the school.

elephantoverthehill Fri 17-Mar-17 21:02:02

To whom would you report this? I wouldn't have a clue.

zzzzz Fri 17-Mar-17 21:04:36

I'd call and ask to speak to the person responsible for safeguarding or the HT. I would not talk to anyone else about it (including office staff)

AliciaMayEmory Fri 17-Mar-17 21:04:52

The school will have a Safeguarding Lead who you can talk to. I think it is a definite worry and you wouldn't be overreacting to speak to them about it.

stubbornstains Fri 17-Mar-17 21:05:45

Well, the thing with dope is that you remain able to function, in a way that you wouldn't be able to if you were having your first drink of the day at 9.00 am. No, it's not ideal, but think- if you were to report her and your report was acted upon, what do you think would happen? Do you think her kids would thrive better in foster care, if they were taken away from her, or if she went to prison?

FruitCider Fri 17-Mar-17 21:07:36

Well, the thing with dope is that you remain able to function, in a way that you wouldn't be able to if you were having your first drink of the day at 9.00 am.

Are you kidding me? I'm much more coherent after 5 pints than I ever was after half a spliff. People use it because it's a mind altering substance. They must gain something out of it, otherwise they wouldn't use it.

MAS7 Fri 17-Mar-17 21:07:50

Probably besides the point but if I did report it she would know it was me, unless there are other times and other mums she has done this in front of. I hope not. Can people smoke cannabis in the morning and still function ok?

FruitCider Fri 17-Mar-17 21:08:09

or if she went to prison

Not likely!

PortiaCastis Fri 17-Mar-17 21:08:36

Without the spliffy end as evidence what do you say ?

x2boys Fri 17-Mar-17 21:09:02

i couldnt look after a toddler after smoking a joint and it pissees me off that parents cant wait a few minutes at the school gate without lighting up [and i,m an occasional smoker] but what exactly could school do about it they couldnt prove or disprove it?

IamScarfaceClaw Fri 17-Mar-17 21:10:23

Leave it, she may have a high tolerance, if so it will barely affect her.

I think it's ridiculous that so many of you would consider this a safeguarding issue.

(Disclaimer- non smoker, non pearl-clutcher)

MAS7 Fri 17-Mar-17 21:14:06

Scarface, genuine question hope it doesn't sound confrontational...why would you smoke it if you've got a high tolerance and it barely affects you?

FellOutOfBed2wice Fri 17-Mar-17 21:14:14

God, it's been a long time since I smoked weed but it definitely didn't leave me able to function any more than boozing does.

Mum2jenny Fri 17-Mar-17 21:14:42

Smoking a joint is fairly normal and is not a safeguarding issue IMO, and no, I don't smoke or take any drugs.

Wolfiefan Fri 17-Mar-17 21:14:58

Safeguarding issue? Mother smoking illegal drugs around a small child. Um yes. Contact school.

x2boys Fri 17-Mar-17 21:17:37

i have a friend [more of an aquaitance] now who smokes cannabis all day every day she has children although her oldest is now an adult and youngest at secondary school she has presumably built up a tolerance for it i have smoked weed and one small joint would make me want to sleep but i guess if you smoke it all the time?

stubbornstains Fri 17-Mar-17 21:20:27

Can people smoke cannabis in the morning and still function ok?

Yup. They build up a tolerance. I've known a lot of heavy, habitual smokers in my time. Yes, it would floor you or I, all of you going "But I smoked half a spliff once and I fell over!", but that's because we only smoke v. occasionally, so of course it's going to have a greater effect.

Trainspotting1984 Fri 17-Mar-17 21:20:42

I'm undecided! Who would you report to and what would you expect them to do?

Realistically the outcome is someone (school, SS) "tell her off" and she stops smoking in public on the way to school. She won't actually give up will she? So I can't see how reporting can help.

Now if she was driving I'd have no qualms

Euripidesralph Fri 17-Mar-17 21:24:49

I'm a cigarette smoker (yes yes I know)and an ex substance misuse professional. ..and damn right report her
There are limits , no such thing as "just a joint" and feel free to ask some of my lovely experiences with cannabis users in mental health units should you think it is a safe drug

Granted it's my choice not to ever ever smoke cigarettes around my kids....but it's for a good reason. ...fine for a consenting adult to choose not to expose a child to it
And no people don't function normally , they think they do but reactions and thought processes are inhibited

I'm the most laid back parent in the world and this absolutely crosses the line

elephantoverthehill Fri 17-Mar-17 21:25:08

I am still rather confused. Why report it to the school? The school aged child is in school, hopefully being safeguarded by staff not smoking spliffs.

TheCakes Fri 17-Mar-17 21:25:12

It's got to a pretty high level if she's smoking a joint on the school run. I think even the most hardened pot-heads would at least wait till they got home and away from the school gates.
Makes me wonder if there's something more going on, if it seems either normal or needed in those circumstances.

Crunchyside Fri 17-Mar-17 21:26:39

I wouldn't report someone for this unless I had other reasons to be concerned about the child's wellbeing.

Zafodbeeblbrox10 Fri 17-Mar-17 21:28:40

Not being judgemental but as a comparison what about a mum who is taking prescription AD's (for example), legal psychotropic drugs?

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