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I know I'm being unreasonable..

(11 Posts)
toffeepuddin Sat 11-Mar-17 23:14:13

..and the rest but i cant help it. Im going through fertility investigations and I'm having a camera in my womb next week to confirm what's wrong..and my parents seems like they couldn't be less interested.
My parents already have a grandchild, my nephew who is 2 off my brother and his girlfriend.
I had a big rant to them saying they wouldn't be bothered about me having a baby and if I ever do have one they won't see it cos they won't be excited or bothered cos they have a grandchild. I don't know whether it's the anxiety/depression getting me to me (which I know I have through years of ttc) or whether they should actually be a bit more sensitive and interested!

mumtomaxwell Sat 11-Mar-17 23:29:43

I can imagine my MIL being like that... she never ever rings or texts to see how we are. Whenever it comes up she says she doesn't like to disturb us or interfere!! Perhaps your parents are trying not to put you under any extra pressure/stress?

Good luck next week, hope you get answers.

Crunchymum Sat 11-Mar-17 23:38:41

I'm sorry you are going through this OP but I am sure your parents are just keeping quiet as to not put any pressure on you?

As for not wanting another grandchild (as they already have one), that is unlikely. They'll love each and every grandchild they have.

Best of luck with your investigation. I have suffered recurrent miscarriage so I do get where you are coming from. I have children now but I'd had losses when both my sis and sil had babies (and of course my folks were caught with the new babies)

Crunchymum Sat 11-Mar-17 23:39:16

* caught up

steff13 Sat 11-Mar-17 23:43:01

I'm sure it's difficult for you, and being sensitive is understandable. But I think it's difficult for them, too. I'd they're too involved, they're pressuring you. I'd they're not involved, they're not interested. I think a lot of times people don't know what to do or say in these situations.

steff13 Sat 11-Mar-17 23:43:34

If. Stupid phone

PurpleDaisies Sat 11-Mar-17 23:44:15

I think it's difficult for others to know how to best support people with trouble conceiving. I would rather stick pins in my eyes than discuss it with family but I appreciate everyone's different. Have you told them before your big rant you'd like to talk about it and you'd value their support?

I hope the test can find a fixable problem. It's a horrible position to be in. flowers

PurpleDaisies Sat 11-Mar-17 23:45:38

I forgot to ask, how did they respond when you said you didn't think they'd be interested in your baby?

altiara Sat 11-Mar-17 23:52:30

Maybe they're being a bit too sensitive, they might want you to feel under pressure but at the same time they can't really say don't worry about it, it's doesn't matter. it must be difficult for all of you. Did your 'rant' have the desired effect? I hope so. Good luck with the test flowers

Starlighter Sun 12-Mar-17 09:03:10

Sorry to hear that, hope all goes ok.

What happened after you ranted?

Some people just don't know what to say. They could be worried and nervous and very interested but just don't know how to approach it with u. They could be burying their heads in the sand and/or just think everything is going to be ok. Maybe sit down and have a really good chat with them. They might not get how much this is affecting u.

toffeepuddin Sun 12-Mar-17 10:11:06

Thanks ladies, my mum and dad just shrugged it off as me being stupid. I think my dad doesn't ask cos he doesn't know how to handle me being upset but my mum was very interested and keen st first but not now. It just seems like they've got their grandchild and are not bothered. But hey ho, ill be bothered. I hope it's a fixable too if it is, it will hold back my ivf so I'm in limbo. Might go round today and apologise and have a chat with them smile

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