To feel my relationship is uneven ...(1 Post)
And he can't see it?
I have a 12 year old daughter, my boyfriend of almost 4 years has been living with us for about 3 years now and the last 6 months we seem to go through a 2 monthly cycle of everyone sharing the chores gradually ending in me doing everything then going psycho bitch on them for leaving it all to me.
I work from home, but I have a full time job working for a call centre over the internet (clever technology means no commute!) I do the washing, cooking, tidying, changing the bed and probably more. He goes shopping on a Saturday morning for his mum and picks up and bits on the list I compile and stops off on his way home from work for top up milk and bread midweek.
My daughter for her pocket money has to wash up twice a week, wash her own clothes and vacuum the living room carpet once a fortnight.
Today was a psycho bitch day and I hate myself but there is never an apology from him. The washing up has been piling up for the last week and a half - I've been leaving it to make a point and I hate myself for being so petty but I've now stopped doing the little bits while working and I'm now using my lunch break to do what I want instead of stuff round the house, I've started doing these bits of an evening.
When he finishes work, he comes in, takes the dog out to have a pee, then sits on his arse the whole evening. When I finish work (before him) I cook dinner, then do the tidy up bits I used to do during the day and probably sit down for about an hour before we go to bed.
When I go psycho bitch he tries to tell me that he helps out by doing the shopping (which he enjoys, but then expects me to put the shopping away) and thinks we are even. I have tried being reasonable in the past and been told "why don't you ask me to help" and I told him "we are supposed to be partners - I shouldn't have to ask you to do washing up that is obvious or take care of an overflowing dirty wash basket!"
Please help me with tactics because I'm at the end of my tether and as much as I love him this could be a deal breaker if it goes on much longer.
Join the discussion
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.Register now
Already registered with Mumsnet? Log in to leave your comment or alternatively, sign in with Facebook or Google.
Please login first.