Putting pressure on myself?(5 Posts)
AIBU.....I'm 38 weeks pregnant with number two. DS is 2.4 and I'm exhausted. I'm beating myself up about so much at the moment and feel like I'm failing him as I cannot do anything. So today he wakes up with cold and fever and all he has wanted is cuddles and drinks. He's watched TV on and off all day. He has played but lost interest after 10-15 minutes cos he wants a cuddle. I had to take him out in the car just to get him to nap as he's so snotty. He's not wanted anything to eat apart from yoghurt and dry biscuits. Aside from him being under the weather today I've felt that I should be taking him soft play, park, playdates, doing painting, plasticine, walks in forests and all this other crazy shit you see parents post about in Facebook. I've got so many worries about what I should be doing as a parent and struggling with. First one being I'm not great in the kitchen. I can do a few sturdy meals which I freeze up so he has at least one home cooked meal a day but I'm not very creative and have to rely on recipes. I have no confidence cooking him things.
Another thing is the TV. I'm so uncomfortable and struggling so much to move at the moment that he watches more TV than normal. Today is an exception as he's unwell and doesn't want to do anything.
I feel on my days with him (he does two days at nursery) I should be baking cakes, looking for the Gruffalo in the forest, going to reading sessions and the library, painting leaves and shit! I see other parents seemingly doing all this and I feel so guilty. I do feel I'm a crap mum. My mum assures me she never baked and looked for leaves in forests with me and I've grown up ok but this pressure seems to be mounting in me. Plus the fact that number two will soon be here I feel I'm gonna be an even shittier mum...
Please tell me I'm not losing the plot and the Facebook photos of friends' kids doing lovely things are all bollocks?!?
I hate doing this stuff with my kids. I find it sooooo boring. I do feel guilty sometimes but honestly, my mum never did it with us either. We found our own entertainment which normally involved other kids. I watched loads of tv and read loads of books too.
You are beating yourself up about nothing. It is probably your hormones and overactive imagination.
Facebook is bollocks and for attention seekers who want to paint a perfect life. You are holding yourself up to some kind of superwoman ideal that doesn't exist. Also some women throw themselves into activities so they avoid doing the mundane REAL things in life and/or they get help with the real mundane things in life.
Attention, cuddles, nourishment is what most kids need - the rest (arts and crafts and toys) is not a necessity. Listen to your mother!
This momentary down shall pass.
Thanks for your replies. Managed to give him a homemade meal from freezer which he has eaten so one win today but feel like excessive TV today puts me back in a negative! Just get fed up of all the parents on social media painting their lives out to be a cross between Blue Peter and Centre Parks!
Try not to mistake FB for reality.
People generally only post stuff that's going to leave a positive impression or make them look like a super parent. They're not going to be posting so much of the mundane everyday stuff, or about the times when DC won't engage with the activities or the times when activities go horribly wrong and you're left wishing you'd just sat them in front of CBeebies instead.
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