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To be angry at DH for quitting his job???

(125 Posts)
username12345678 Tue 07-Mar-17 18:56:45

I am so angry and frustrated. He feels that i am BU and that I should be supportive.
He have his reasons for leaving but in my opinion when you have 3 DC you don't just walk off without having another option.
angry

MaudGonneMad Tue 07-Mar-17 18:58:01

What were his reasons?

I'm inclined to think YANBU. Do you work? How likely and how quickly is he likely to find something else?

AyeAmarok Tue 07-Mar-17 18:58:03

YANBU. I'd be raging in all but a very few specific scenarios. What are his reasons for leaving?

Bantanddec Tue 07-Mar-17 19:00:06

What are his reasons?

harderandharder2breathe Tue 07-Mar-17 19:01:13

Generally yanbu but what were his reasons?

If it was bullying not dealt with, affecting his health (mental or physically) then you might be BU

PigletWasPoohsFriend Tue 07-Mar-17 19:02:13

Depends upon his reasons really.

user1483387154 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:03:56

Completely depends on the reason why. If the job was causing mental anguish etc then I can understand his leaving.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:04:40

Too little information really to judge.

Astoria7974 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:05:46

Need to understand why. Also if you don't work maybe you could start?

Babyroobs Tue 07-Mar-17 19:06:29

I agree with previous posters. It depends on the reasons. If his job was causing him so much stress that he just couldn't carry on then it is understandable. Otherwise yes it is reckless. Do you have an income from you coming in as back up until he finds something else?

TheLegendOfBeans Tue 07-Mar-17 19:08:50

I had this done to me and I could've strangled him for doing it.

He never ever forgave me for not being "supportive" as my reaction was just "WTF will you do now?"

The vile torrents I got for that ONE reaction led to me divorcing him 9 months later. It was - to me - a reckless move indicative of the extreme and erratic personality the man I once loved had become. I hated him for doing it and we didn't even have DCs.

Unless there is extremely good reason for him doing this to me it's almost divorce worthy.

Please tell me he has something to go to?

MarcelineTheVampire Tue 07-Mar-17 19:09:17

As pp have said- it is entirely dependent on reasons....

username12345678 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:09:41

Well, he has been complaining a lot about his boss. They are both short tempered, but they do get along well if not arguing.
My point is that i have been advising him to look for something else as i can see he won't last long. But as soon as he get along with his boss he forgets all about it.
I do work but part time on a low pay, so he is the main provider for the family.
I am supposed to stop working by end of April due to medical reasons.

HecateAntaia Tue 07-Mar-17 19:10:04

depends on more than his reasons.
it also depends on how the children get fed and the bills get paid.
when you are a parent you dont always have the luxury of walking out of a job.
do you work? are there savings that will tide you over until he finds something else?

SookiesSocks Tue 07-Mar-17 19:10:36

The reasons will determin the answer.

I was bullied at work many years ago and it was affecting my mh and physical health. I walked out. Best thing i did.

TheLegendOfBeans Tue 07-Mar-17 19:11:49

No excuse.

I would be livid, so YANBU.

username12345678 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:13:09

Thats my point. Leaving your almost only income because you have stress or whatever won't feed your children.

SookiesSocks Tue 07-Mar-17 19:13:57

No but you wont be able to feed the from your hospital bed or worse either hmm

ThroughThickAndThin01 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:14:09

What is his plan of action?

TheLegendOfBeans Tue 07-Mar-17 19:14:43

I would never ever advocate someone stay in a role that was damaging their MH but a Plan b is abolsutely key. And even more so when there are kids to feed.

username12345678 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:15:22

He is always been stressed at work with different jobs in the past so same problem everywhere.
I did ask him few times for me to go into full time while he care for dc but its a no no for him. He just can't deal with them.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:15:40

At the moment I don't think 'livid' is a great response tbh.

PigletWasPoohsFriend Tue 07-Mar-17 19:16:14

Leaving your almost only income because you have stress or whatever won't feed your children.

Sorry but that is unfair. Especially as you say you are leaving your job soon foe medical reasons.

You seem to be very dismissive of his stress or whatever as you put it.

username12345678 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:16:43

I just want to burst into crying. Don't want to lose it in front of DCs

RhiWrites Tue 07-Mar-17 19:18:15

Yes, it's irresponsible. His stress is valid, but as you say he should have looked for other employment rather than going back and forth between saying it's fine and then snapping and quitting in a fit of pique.

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