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Do you expect to pay for our own drinks at he evening do of a wedding?

(226 Posts)
WhistlingBetty Tue 07-Mar-17 16:01:44

I am getting married in six weeks and we need to let he venue know what we want to do about the bar.

We have 100 day guests and as well as canapes and a three course meal alcohol included is:

3 X glasses of champagne
Half a bottle of wine

We have an additional 30 guests for the evening and are doing a hot buffet. How much alcohol would you expect to be covered as an evening guest or a day guest going to the evening party? We can't afford a free bar.

SissySpacekAteMyHamster Tue 07-Mar-17 16:03:38

I would expect to pay for my own drinks.

Lulu1083 Tue 07-Mar-17 16:03:40

We put enough behind the bar to buy everyone at the evening a drink (and estimated generously) then when that ran out people paid for their own. Would that work for you?

PickleSarnie Tue 07-Mar-17 16:03:50

I wouldn't expect any free drinks at an evening do. I'd expect food though. I think it's fine what you're doing

RiversrunWoodville Tue 07-Mar-17 16:03:52

No evening dos I've been to we've always bought our own drinks

rookiemere Tue 07-Mar-17 16:04:19

For the day invitees I think your allowance is fine. For the evening guests I would expect to provide them with at least a glass of wine or fizz on arrival and a decent buffet.

Sparklingbrook Tue 07-Mar-17 16:04:36

I wouldn't expect a free drink at all. Maybe a glass of something on arrival if you feel the need but other than that don't worry.

wobblywonderwoman Tue 07-Mar-17 16:04:41

That is perfect op! Generous actually. We had two glasses of wine per person

trevortrevorslattery Tue 07-Mar-17 16:04:44

If there was even one free drink in the evening I would be very pleasantly surprised - I would definitely not bat an eyelid at paying for all my own drinks.

webSocket Tue 07-Mar-17 16:04:45

If you can't afford a free bar then don't have one whatsoever.

It will get too complicated.

I enjoy a free bar but don't think any the less of anyone if it's a cash bar instead. That's as long as the prices are reasonable. I did judge the couple where a glass of house red was £7 and the cheeky fuckers were passing on the cost of a nice venue to the guests.

End your outgoings after the meal / toasts and relax.

Jenniferb21 Tue 07-Mar-17 16:04:50

I wouldn't expect anything for the evenings I've always paid for drinks at weddings in the evenings and for my wedding I had some paid for in the day but a normal bar where guests paid at night.


RiversrunWoodville Tue 07-Mar-17 16:05:01

Argh posted too soon! Meant to finish with I wouldn't worry op, I don't think it's expected to provide drinks for it, unless NI is different.

ChocolateButton15 Tue 07-Mar-17 16:05:01

I would expect to pay for my own drinks. Haven't been to a wedding with a free bar! I think it's normal now to get the wine with dinner and a glass of champagne to toast

esiotrot2015 Tue 07-Mar-17 16:05:13

We bought everyone their first drink , a glass of prosecco

After everyone has travelled and laid for staying the night I think it's the right thing to do

Sittinginthesun Tue 07-Mar-17 16:05:24

I would expect to buy my own, but it's a bonus if you put some money behind the bar - maybe cover the first drink?

AnythingGoesWithMe Tue 07-Mar-17 16:05:54

I'd expect a drink after the ceremony, a drink for the toast and some wine on the table during dinner. I don't mind paying for drinks in the evening.

Willow2017 Tue 07-Mar-17 16:06:54

I think a complementary drink available on arrival then pay for your own

Wouldnt expect free drinks people would literally take the p and order stuff they eouldnt pay for themselves!

hickorydickorynurseryrhyme Tue 07-Mar-17 16:07:45


PurpleMinionMummy Tue 07-Mar-17 16:08:30

I wouldn't expect any to be covered and have never been to a wedding where the bride and groom gave a free bar.

There's a whole host of mumsnetters who think its exceptionally rude to not pay for the whole evening bar though.....just to warn you!

user1483387154 Tue 07-Mar-17 16:08:34

I would expect to pay for my drinks especially in the evening. However it is nice when the bride and groom are able to provide arrival drink, toast drink plus some wine for during the meal.

TizzyDongue Tue 07-Mar-17 16:08:51

Just about all weddings I've been to are:

Wine provided with meal - free
One drink of choice or a glass of champagne/ fizzy for toasts - free
Other other drinks bought by me

TizzyDongue Tue 07-Mar-17 16:09:39

Oh yes some sort of free drink on arrival at reception. Forgot that one!!

PinkDaffodil2 Tue 07-Mar-17 16:10:02

I wouldn't expect free drinks at all at the evening do, however I've been pleasantly surprised a couple of times when there was some money behind the bar - never the whole evening, but enough to cover people's first drink. Not necessary though x

bloodyteenagers Tue 07-Mar-17 16:10:19

Decent buffet and a glass of something on arrival. The bar I used were happy for us to take in bottles of fizz for the first drink. They were more than happy to trust that the guests would drink the bar dry. We didn't take the piss and they even helped work out how many bottles would need for everyone to have a glass.

ScarlettFreestone Tue 07-Mar-17 16:10:23

My experience is generally a glass of champagne on arrival, a tea or coffee with the evening buffet and a paid bar for everything else.

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