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To ask when 'liking a drink' becomes alcoholism?

(25 Posts)
RedHareWithBlondeHair Thu 02-Mar-17 20:08:17

Just that? I'm drinking most evenings and often feel foggy throughout the following day. That said, I do sometimes wonder if I'm being very excessive. I do also feel at times I'm just unable to do basic things because I'm just too hungover but I see others managing stressful jobs and getting on with things despite liking a drink. Where is the line drawn?

Beth2511 Thu 02-Mar-17 20:19:56

could you quite happily live without it?

my mum has spent 2 weeks in ICU and is now on week 3 of HDU for alcohol related liver disease... she was dping 3 bottles pf wine a day but it didnt start off that way

Prawnofthepatriarchy Thu 02-Mar-17 20:20:44

If you Google "am I an alcoholic" you will find loads of quizzes, including this one from AA. You don't have to be physically dependent on alcohol to have a problem. It's more about how it affects your life. Comparing yourself to others isn't very helpful.

I would ask yourself how much you look forward to that first drink, and how you feel if you won't be able to drink for some reason. It's liking it too much that's a sign.

I'd do a few online tests. Be strictly truthful or it's a waste of time. See what they tell you. If you've got a problem you need to deal with it.

LobsterQuadrille Thu 02-Mar-17 20:22:31

Is it adversely affecting your life in any way? Can you stop? Do you feel powerless over alcohol?

Alcoholism was described at a recent AA meeting as like dancing with a gorilla. You choose when to start dancing but the gorilla decides when the dancing stops.

Prawnofthepatriarchy Thu 02-Mar-17 20:23:14

So sorry to hear that, Beth. That's how it can end up, OP. Alternatively you can end up like me, happily sober for longer than some posters have been alive.

RedHareWithBlondeHair Thu 02-Mar-17 20:28:27

I drink every single day. I often have the shakes in the morning and have skipped many days from work due to not just being able to get up. I drink as soon as I get the opportunity and I sometimes cannot recall things that happened last week. And I feel at times I'm stupid because I cannot focus on anything or keep a thought in my head. It's a constant fog.

KinkyAfro Thu 02-Mar-17 20:30:04

What and how much are you drinking?

Wolfiefan Thu 02-Mar-17 20:31:58

Drinking every day is a problem.
Having the shakes is a problem.
Missing work due to drinking is a problem.
Feeling foggy and being forgetful is a problem.
You have a drinking problem. Seek help.

WhereYouLeftIt Thu 02-Mar-17 20:32:03

Why do you drink every single day? Especially when you know you'll end up with a hangover and unable to function the next day?

HopeClearwater Thu 02-Mar-17 20:32:59

RedHare you know that you've got a problem. Go to AA. They know and understand just how you feel.

HopeClearwater Thu 02-Mar-17 20:34:21

'Today 20:32 WhereYouLeftIt

Why do you drink every single day? Especially when you know you'll end up with a hangover and unable to function the next day?'

I expect because she feels she can't do without it. Is this a question designed to help the OP or just to point out the bleeding obvious to her?

RiverdaleJughead Thu 02-Mar-17 20:36:07

I got to this point a few weeks ago and I decided to get a proper evening routine in place - shower, a hot mashed banana and some turmeric tea and then get into bed to watch some tv. Gives you something to do and I also said I will only drink alcohol when my friends invite me to do something with them or I'm on holiday/ visiting family ... no more drinking alone. I also calculated the calories I drank and that helped me stop ( I lost 5lb in 1 week just from no booze). I still get cravings but I ignore it , you just have to commit. I was worried I was an alcoholic. It have had a bottle of prosecco unopened in my room for 3 weeks now smile if you truly can't stop yourself then you should see a doctor x

WhereYouLeftIt Thu 02-Mar-17 20:36:51

HopeClearwater because actually there are many reasons why she might be drinking. And some reasons are easier to fight than others.

Prawnofthepatriarchy Thu 02-Mar-17 20:38:37

You're physically dependent on alcohol. Going by your description you're an alcoholic. The question is what are you prepared to do about it? Because Lobster is right. You're dancing with a gorilla. Unless you do something about your drinking it will do things to you.

maggiecate Thu 02-Mar-17 20:54:05

You do the CAGE questionnaire and if the answer to two of the questions is yes, you may have a problem

1. Have you ever felt you needed to Cut down on your drinking?
2. Have people Annoyed you by criticizing your drinking?
3. Have you ever felt Guilty about drinking?
4. Have you ever felt you needed a drink first thing in the morning (*E*ye-opener) to steady your nerves or to get rid of a hangover.

Just reading your posts, I'm guessing you would answer yes to at least 1, 3 & 4. Given that you've posted this I think that you suspect that wherever the line is for you (and it differs for everyone), you've crossed it already. Time to look for people who can support you - it might be a long road, but you've made the first step and there will be plenty who'll walk beside you. Good luck flowers

userformallyknownasuser1475360 Thu 02-Mar-17 20:58:00

Hi Redhare, I am a recovering alcoholic, and the only person who can tell whether or not you are an alcoholic is you.

It was once said to me that you know you are an alcoholic when booze is costing you more than what you are handing the bar man, or the guy at the counter.

It was causing me problems with family life, finances and every part of my life. I'm happy to give more info if you want to pm me

Trifleorbust Thu 02-Mar-17 21:00:18

Please don't cut down or stop drinking without medical help. Do get help. Your GP will help you.

leedspirate Thu 02-Mar-17 21:01:11

I have been exactly the same. It is wrong but it took me a long time to realise it.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Thu 02-Mar-17 21:02:04

I am a problem drinker and up until January 1st I was knocking back a litre of gin over three/ four days and still able to work 5 days a week with few ill- effects, pounding heart and 'the fear' at 3.00 in the morning.

I've been teetotal for 57 days and the relief is immense.

I think you should speak to a professional to get some help if you can't stop by yourself and I do think you have a serious problem from what you've written.

LobsterQuadrille Thu 02-Mar-17 21:05:29

Hi OP, I've just read your update and I'd second the PP who said get yourself to an AA meeting. I've been in recovery for some years, but alcoholism is a progressive illness and it's only going to get worse unless you take steps now (sorry if that sounds harsh). At my lowest, I was drinking 24 hours a day and suffered DTs and had a massive seizure that could have killed me when I stopped. Don't get to that point. Many in AA didn't get to the 24/7 drinking stage - the only requirement to join is a desire to stop drinking.

I really wish you luck. It can be a dark and lonely place when you put drink before anything else.

LouisevilleLlama Thu 02-Mar-17 21:05:32

I'm not sure for me it was when I realised I had a mini fridge full of alcohol instead of food. Now I hardly drink to be honest like once or twice a year. Problem is on here the range of drinking will differ some will say I drink too much whilst others will find a bottle a night fine. I think if you're questioning it that's a big sign

Prawnofthepatriarchy Fri 03-Mar-17 13:09:09

Another AA member here. It's been a wonderful thing for me - saved my life and my relationships. People say it's religious, that was my first impression too, but it's not. It gave me freedom and some lovely friends. If you can stop drinking on your own, fine. If you keep trying and keep failing then AA might be your answer.

TheOnlyLivingBoyinNewCork Fri 03-Mar-17 13:10:17

I drink every single day. I often have the shakes in the morning and have skipped many days from work due to not just being able to get up. I drink as soon as I get the opportunity and I sometimes cannot recall things that happened last week. And I feel at times I'm stupid because I cannot focus on anything or keep a thought in my head. It's a constant fog

That clearly isn't "liking a drink" and I think you know it,.

IamFriedSpam Fri 03-Mar-17 13:14:33

Yes I think that level of drinking is clearly a problem as even aside from the health impact it's negatively affecting your life already.

I think are perceptions of what is "normal" or acceptable drinking levels are totally skewed too. My Cousin works on a liver ward and says it's shocked her into cutting back a lot. There's just such variation in how much drinking can affect you physically - especially women. Even people who rarely get noticeably drunk can find themselves with cirrhosis (while others who are heaving drinkers sometimes get off without many affects).

titsbumfannythelot Fri 03-Mar-17 13:20:52

I think you need to get some help for that, before it escalates even further.

My mum died at 52 from alcohol related illness.

Please get some help before it's too late flowers

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