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AIBU?

To have separation anxiety?

9 replies

Dilligufdarling · 02/03/2017 13:28

So I'm on day two of returning to work.
My lovely DD is at home with DH, she is 5 months tomorrow and he is a wonderful and very capable sahd.

But.... I just feel sick and nervous and anxious and absolutely horrible for being separated from her.
I can't concentrate at work and when I got home last night I didn't want to let her out of my sight, as if I could absorb her through my skin.
I normally co-sleep from around 5 am but last night it was all night just to maximise the closeness.

I have done this before with DS around 4 years ago and I don't remember feeling this way.

I've managed to hold it together just about and haven't given in to the raging torrent of tears that is threatening.... but I know it's there.

Has anyone else felt like this? Does it get better???? How long until I don't feel so awful.
She is totally not missing me at all :) and is her usual happy self.

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Dilligufdarling · 02/03/2017 14:26

Can anyone help with this?

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welshweasel · 02/03/2017 14:28

Oh bless you. I cried every day for a week when I went back to work when DS was 4 months old. I felt like a bit of me had been ripped out. I thought I'd made a terrible mistake. After a week I totally got over myself and loved being at work.

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Whiterabbitears · 02/03/2017 14:29

I have been there and its horrible. You do get more used to it especially when they get older but its never really left me, I still would rather be with my kids all day despite work and school getting in the way.

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Dilligufdarling · 02/03/2017 14:30

Thank you so much weasel.
I'd told myself that the first day would be the worst and then it would be fine... but I'm still not fine at all.
I just want to run to the station and whizz home to her.

I'm hanging on for the weekend at the moment.

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NavyandWhite · 02/03/2017 14:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Dilligufdarling · 02/03/2017 14:33

Yes, having DH look after her is a big help. He's being very patient with my phone calls (every hour!) and sending lots of photos.

It does feel exactly liken something's been ripped from me. My heart hurts.

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Dilligufdarling · 03/03/2017 17:44

I must say that it's been much easier today. I've booked a day off next week too to break it up a bit more

DH has been sending me loads of pictures.

The hardest thing was filing all of the emails and remembering what I'd been doing at the time and wishing I could rewind and redo the time. Not change anything, just relive it again.

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sonjadog · 03/03/2017 17:53

How about letting yourself have the cry you want to have? It might let the tension out and you might feel better afterwards. Sometimes bottling these things up can be the worst thing to do.

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Dilligufdarling · 03/03/2017 18:01

I think I will tonight sonja. (Possibly whilst snuggling DD!) I just needed to hold it together at work.
I work in a very male dominated antiquated and chauvinist industry where "hysterical" women are not respected or thought to be professional. "Hysterical" covers anything from a bit misty eyed onwards!
It's crap but sadly true.