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Upset that the ex is asking for money again ...

(10 Posts)
36plusandtrying Tue 28-Feb-17 09:09:55

Is this normal ? Husband split from ex - over 9 years ago. From then she had gone from one failed relationship to another. Moving countries, interstate in the process. Dragging DSS through multiple rental properties, and 3 schools in his 9 years. We now have shared custody, eoww. We want more but she won't grant it so to not upset his routine. hmmNow another relationship has failed and she has to find somewhere to live with DSS. She wants $2k bond money for a new rental, over and above the money we give her monthly ... Which exceeds my husbands legal obligation .... Aibu to be pissed off by this ? She works, gets financial help from DH and is surrounded by her direct family. This time we've said no, but previously we've helped. Why is she coming to us, not standing on her own 2 feet ?

AgainstTheOddsNo2 Tue 28-Feb-17 09:16:11

Because she can. That's it really.

WateryTart Tue 28-Feb-17 09:17:39

Just say no. DSS can live with you until she sorts herself out.

Guavaf1sh Tue 28-Feb-17 09:19:26

Agree. Say no

thethoughtfox Tue 28-Feb-17 12:09:57

She's asking because you have given it every other time. Say no and offer to take the child while she sorts something out if necessary.

MummaBear14 Tue 28-Feb-17 13:16:25

Yes, say no. DSS can stay with you, if they're classed as homeless the law is in your DH's favour in this one. Will also help the case, if you do pursue for more custody. If he has been dragged out of school again, then also enrol him into your nearest school, that will also work in your favour.

SparkleTwinkleGoldGlitter Tue 28-Feb-17 13:21:06

Says no and make it clear dss is welcome to stay with you.

she is a grown women ffs and needs to be able to provide for herself. She can't go running to the ex for money every time

JustSpeakSense Tue 28-Feb-17 13:24:26

Agree with above posters.

Say No, but make is clear DSS will have a stable home with you for as long as necessary until she sorts herself out.

JonesyAndTheSalad Tue 28-Feb-17 13:44:35

I assume she rents because she doesn;t own? I'm sorry about your upset with her re, cash but I have to say that as someone who rents rather than owns, I hate that you seem to think it's her fault that her children have to move regularly. That's what happens when your'e a tenant. Landlords sometimes sell your home.

36plusandtrying Tue 28-Feb-17 20:40:43

And the salad - yes I agree that landlord sell from underneath you. But that isn't why she moves - each time it's to a different part of a large city - to be with a new man or to start a fresh ! (Often meaning a new school)

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