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AIBU?

To think moving at 9pm is a little inconsiderate?

38 replies

blitzgirl · 26/02/2017 07:53

My neighbours front door is less than a metre away from mine and dd (4) bedroom door is right next to the front door. Yesterday my neighbours decided to move out. They took their living room furniture out around 10am and then nothing all day. At 8.30 last night they decided to come back and move the remaining large items from their flat. Cue lots of noise in the hallway, screaming children, shouting etc. Dd has been poorly for a week now with an ear infection and horrible cough, she was in bed at this point settling after a rather unsettled night the previous night. All this noise and commotion woke her up. We waited until around half 9 before finally sending a text to ask politely if they could keep the noise down in the hall as dd was ill and trying to sleep. I was in Dd's room with her when the text got sent and as a result I could hear the reaction to it. One of their visitors shouting at the top of their voice asking what the time was and tenant saying we had no right to complain, they can hear dd in the daytime etc. We have never complained to them about their antisocial noise before and there has been a lot. So AIBU to think these people are just plain thick that they thought it was ok to decide to move their stuff at 9pm and also that they think it's ok to let their helpers continue shouting their mouths off after being asked to keep the noise down? I honestly don't think I could stand another night of it tonight if they do

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dudsville · 26/02/2017 07:56

I don't know what you can do about that level of inconsideration except be grateful they're moving.

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Lostwithinthehills · 26/02/2017 07:57

I think that if your neighbours are that awful you should just be glad that they are leaving! What's a day or two of noise if you know you'll never have to put up with them again?

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F1GI · 26/02/2017 07:57

Well if they were trying to move out, it's not exactly something they could just stop. Perhaps they couldn't get people to help them lift the heavy stuff earlier. In your position I would have moved dd into your bed if she was being disturbed. Their helpers were prob not wanting to do it either. I think this is s of those things you should have just gritted teeth and got through esp as they are moving out which you must be pleased about.

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TupperwareTat · 26/02/2017 08:02

It will be ok, just let them fuck off move out, it will all be worth it.

They were probably tired & stressed as well.

Moving with kids literally behind your feet is hell. I did it alone with DD & I cried it was so shit.

I hope you get some considerate neighbours move in. I know how stressful it can be.

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blitzgirl · 26/02/2017 08:03

Thanks everyone, when you put it like that yes it's true I should be happy it's the beginning of the end. I think I was more annoyed about the reaction we got when we asked if they could keep the noise down while using the hall way. For some reason dd hates being anywhere but her own bed & I did try to move her but she's a stubborn thing.

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LouKout · 26/02/2017 08:03

They're away.

I think in this instance i wouldnt have sent a text but just waited it out.

Glad they are gone.

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blitzgirl · 26/02/2017 08:04

We weren't expecting them to stop doing what they were doing, just stop shouting at each other while doing it. I understand that sometimes circumstances mean that things have to be done at not so ideal times.

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insancerre · 26/02/2017 08:14

Yabu
They will be moving out just the once
You were unreasonable to txt them
It's not like they would just stop what they were doing
It's not their fault that your dd is poorly and awake
They probably needed some help with the bigger stuff and it was maybe the only time they could do it

Ds had the exact same scenario last weekend
He moved into his flat in the morning but he left the sofa in the van, Dh and ds struggled getting it in to the van as it's very heavy. The plan was that ds work colleagues would collect the van in the morning and help with the sofa. It's up a flight of stairs so dh and ds couldn't do it without help
Except, the other van broke down and his work colleagues had to come and collect his van that evening
Obviously they had to move the sofa out of the van as they needs the van for work. They had to move the sofa at 10.3 which wasn't ideal and wasn't planned
Ds got a note brought his door telling him he was inconsiderate to his neighbours and isn't allowed to make any noise after 9pm. He also isn't allowed to abandon his vehicle and take up 2 parking spaces. The neighbour very kindly drew him a diagram showing where they had allowed him to park. They also said they had reported him to the landlord
The lovely neighbour couldn't even sign it or give their flat number so ds couldn't apologise to them
I told him to ignore it
Some people are just unreasonable

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F1GI · 26/02/2017 08:15

The thing is that angry people don't really respond well to that sort of request. Having seen rage in action a lot, I would not do anything to antagonise an already angry person.

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TheFirstMrsDV · 26/02/2017 08:21

Sorry OP but the text seems a bit pointless and bound to provoke.

They were being unreasonably noisy but they may not have had a choice when to move. Perhaps they could only get help at that time?

If I was doing something stressful like moving out at 9pm, lumping my worldly goods around, I think I would react badly to at text asking me to be quiet.

I am NOT saying they are right or nice or that you are wrong, just that some situations call for a bit of 'suck it up, they'll be gone soon'.

Hope its all done with now.

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blitzgirl · 26/02/2017 08:33

I realise that they were probably stuck moving at that time of night but shouting at the tops of their voices is surely inconsiderate when they know there is a small child likely to be asleep next door? I know how stressful moving can be but at the same time surely it's just common curtesy to respect the people living around you? Even the neighbour the other side heard them and her bedroom is at the back of her property. We have never complained before about anything

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TheFirstMrsDV · 26/02/2017 08:38

I am not disputing the inconsideration of your neighbours.

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blitzgirl · 26/02/2017 08:44

MrsDV I realise that and I also think you raised some good points in your reply.

Looking back on last night we probably shouldn't have sent the text but at the time we didn't think we were being unreasonable asking them to just keep the noise down a bit.

We have another day of it today so I'm taking dd to her nan's house.

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JonesyAndTheSalad · 26/02/2017 08:49

They probably had logistical issues. I wouldn't mind if someone was going...after all it's not something that will be repeated!

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ImissTerry · 26/02/2017 08:49

When you say 'we' do you mean you have a partner. If you do, could they have gone out and offered to help? Could you not have just opened the door and spoken to them and explained about your child being ill? You never know, they might have been a bit more considerate. A text like that would annoy me.

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insancerre · 26/02/2017 08:50

I don't know why you didn't just pop your head out if hurting door and ask in a friendly, neighbourly way if everything was OK
You could then have asked if they were going to be much longer and if they had much more to do, as your dd was poorly and trying to sleep

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TescoCarrierBag · 26/02/2017 08:54

Sounds like maybe your daughter can be heard in the daytime but they were too polite to say?
I know when I moved house I couldn't afford to pay for help so the only time my friends could help me was later after work. Maybe that's their situation too.

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Sugarpiehoneyeye · 26/02/2017 09:22

I hear you OP, but sometimes needs must, can't be easy for them either.
I think it's best if you put up and shut up, until they've gone, then calm will be restored!

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viques · 26/02/2017 09:22

My eyebrows are a bit raised that you and your obviously antisocial neighbours were friendly enough to have exchanged phone numbers! I think I only have the phone number of one of my neighbours, we speak, and are friendly (apart from her next door) but as adults I see no need to have their phone numbers.

Is this just me, do other people have their neighbours contact detailsother people

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insancerre · 26/02/2017 09:25

No I don't have my neighbours numbers
I only know his name because I take in parcels for him and he has a personalised number plate 😁

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Blossomdeary · 26/02/2017 09:27

They are not going to be moving out every day. I should just go with the flow. Life is too short to get your knickers in a twist over something that is a one-off.

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pringlecat · 26/02/2017 09:28

YABU. They probably had no choice in their schedule and it sounds like they were having a very stressful one-off type day. Some understanding would have been good.

You have a child. Children are noisy all day long every day. It doesn't matter how well-behaved (or not) your child is; they make noise that travels and travels far. They move like stampeding elephants (enthusiasm always translates into running quickly and thundering around, which results in muffled thumps being overheard) and when they unreasonably cry at things that don't require crying (such as a spoon being the "wrong" colour), those wails as they come through the walls are awful to listen to (especially without the context and the understanding that the child is just crying because all children cry rather than crying because of neglect).

I don't say this to be mean. You couldn't help your DD making noise. You are unlikely to keep her quiet going forward, because when she finally stops making child noises, she will be a teenager and start screaming at the top of her voice with alarming regularity. But you are not a quiet neighbour and you therefore cannot expect your neighbours to be quiet neighbours. Life isn't quiet (unless you have the funds to live in a totally detached house).

If people could stay quiet between 11pm and 8am, that would be marvellous. There rest of the day (and with tons of sympathy for shift workers) is fair game for every day living noise. And yes, moving in and moving out of houses is part of every day living noise. The next occupants are going to make a similar amount of day time noise when they first move in.

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smurfy2015 · 26/02/2017 09:40

Ive had to do a move as well at an odd time, 11am on a sunday morning is not usually a time to move but me, my stuff and my furniture had found a house 2 hours before, i gathered some friends and had other helpers (local fire brigade) due to the reason i was having to move out of the flat i was in.

It started that morning around 5am and basically went like this, the bedroom floor in top flat gave way which came into my bedroom and the impact of that and the ceiling coming down on me caused my floor to give way and myself and the girl upstairs all landed on top of the couple downstairs in who were in bed when we dropped in literally from upstairs bringing 2 ceilings and 2 floors with us and assorted rubble. The place was condenmed by H&S within an hour.

We didnt have to worry about disturbing neighbours as we were all distrubed and upset that day. It was the fastest move ever. Literally everything was stuffed into bags and my large items like sofa etc were taken out the window by crane and it billed to landlord as while we all had been reporting the problems to him he wouldnt do anything, all costs were attributed to him as owner of building and failure to maintain it safely, turns out the electrics was dodgy and the meter was set to run backwards so the money we were putting in to pay for the electric which was a lot on ecomony 7 was going to his pocket

The house is now revamped and houses offices, my old flat is now an architects office.

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FormerlyFrikadela01 · 26/02/2017 09:40

I'd put money on them not even realising it was that late. I know last time we moved we didn't finish till after midnight but didn't even realise it was that late until we'd actually finished.

Moving is stressful and yes they were maybe a little bit inconsiderate but I bet you have been too on occasion without realising. They'll be gone by the end of tomorrow.

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KondosSecretJunkRoom · 26/02/2017 09:49

I agree, they clearly hadn't realised that it was late - that's fairly typical when you are busy moving house and time gets away from you.

Also, if they were moving heavy items with friends there probably was a lot of yelling trying to manoeuvre stuff without breaking anything/ anyone.

I think you would have been more forgiving if you didn't dislike them in the first place. Anyway, sounds like an awful night for you and your dc, hope you get lovely new neighbours.

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