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to hate the school run?

(82 Posts)
nevermindwhatimdoing Fri 24-Feb-17 15:43:44

I hate the school run. Absolutely hate it and wriggle out of it whenever I can, passing the job on to my hubby. I'm not sure what it is, other than all those women standing around talking bollocks and stealth boasting about their kids and lifestyle. The cliques, of which I was recently part of 😫 make me feel so uncomfortable. In recent weeks I've stopped trying with the other mums and have taken a step back, standing on my own or just chatting to whoever happens to be near me at that moment. I'm happier....I think. But part of me now thinks that I'm a loner, I'm weird for shunning the other women. I'm probably like that in all aspects of my life though. I generally see 'friends' as something I can do without and prefer to spend my free time with DH and the kids.
Does anyone else feel like this about the school run, and about having friends in general?

OneWithTheForce Fri 24-Feb-17 15:46:50

Oh yes I hate it but I never really got into chatting in the playground. I dart in and out as quick as I can. Usually leave it as late as possible before going in to grab DC and run out. I have a few lovely friend s though I've met through DC. God knows how as I'm an awkward antisocial fucker. Why on earth did they ever talk to me?? grin

MissCalamity Fri 24-Feb-17 15:51:14

I hate it. I do it once a week, but DP has started taking ds to breakfast club that day so I get out of the morning one.
I can never seem to time it right so am always early. I never talk to anyone apart from if I see my friend who I've known for 20 odd years, but as her kids are different ages we "stand" in different areas of the playground.
I did try back in nursery (ds is now in year 2) but it was just too much like hard work!
Don't blame you at all!

Wantagoodname Fri 24-Feb-17 15:51:23

I love it!
Not for the other parents, I just really miss dd when she's at school and love her running to give me a hug.
Then the moaning starts about 10 mins later and I wish she was back at school haha

Pyjamaface Fri 24-Feb-17 15:52:58

The school run is boring. Probably doesn't help that nobody talks to me, don't know why, they never have. I had a thread about it last year cos it was getting to me but this year I have developed a serious case of 'don't give a fuck, your loss' especially after a couple of people started having a row about communion dresses of all things

On the plus side I do enjoy the walk home hearing about DS' day and I get to MN while I'm waiting

witsender Fri 24-Feb-17 15:55:41

There are so many posts about this year in year out. Are all schools inhabited by the same type of women? Seems very odd.

MrsXXD Fri 24-Feb-17 15:59:01

I used to dislike the school run more when I had to do it with three kids to three different schools, luckily now DD and DS1 make their own ways to and from school so I just have to take and pick up DS2. I can understand your point about small talk with other mums but I end up talking to the same mums most of the time when waiting to pick the kids up, hopefully not seeming like a clique wink

The80sweregreat Fri 24-Feb-17 16:01:55

Mine went to quite a few schools in the past for different reasons and i just preferred my own space - nothing wrong with that at all.
If its any consultation its been the same at a pilates class that i started llast year, if i had gone there to make friends i would have been so disappointed, they seem even more bitchy there than any of the school gate mums i've had to endure in the past! Its just people , being friendly doesnt seem to register round here but i do not care at all! nothing wrong with being a loner and doing your own thing. In a lot of ways suiting yourself and not listening to all the boasting is very liberating.

KondosSecretJunkRoom Fri 24-Feb-17 16:04:31

I quite like the school run. I don't mind chatting to anyone who happens to be around while I'm waiting but I don't have a crowd I head to which suits me best. I like being sociable without being cornered into a friendship group.

MiaowTheCat Fri 24-Feb-17 16:06:41

I don't mind the school run, but the nursery run this year is really really pissing me off - just a totally nasty clique of women who are openly rude to anyone they don't like (who don't do the school run in full on makeup and glammed up to the eyeballs hairdos) or who dares to park in the spot on the road that they've decided is "theirs". Add in that DD2 has the sheer cheek to be one of the older kids there, so taller than their kids and therefore an automatic vision of menace and terror and the looks of utter revulsion when we show up are enough to have me pissed off for a good 15 minutes or so after I've done with drop off.

I've done drop offs there for 3 years now (through both kids going through the system) and this is the most utterly unfriendly and unpleasant I've ever known it to be - not just me feeling like that - a childminder friend I was talking to who's done drop offs there a similar length of time is finding it pretty damned crap this year as well.

Counting the months till DD2 is finished there and I just have them all to drop off in the same place I can walk to, not have to deal with wars over parking spaces or this coven of identikit blondes.

Fiona170972 Fri 24-Feb-17 16:10:47

I hate it too, in the mornings I time it that I'm one of the last in the school gate. Park at the back of the school then run in with my son. I usually get parked right at the back gate. On return there are a few people I talk to but not in the cleak. I usually park and leave the car at approx 3.23 and walk up to the school, takes about a min. So I don't have to hang about in the playground. I suppose it depends on my mood. I think all the people make me feel nervous.

passmethewineplease Fri 24-Feb-17 16:12:47

I don't mind it, I talk to everyone and anyone. blush

Elroya1 Fri 24-Feb-17 16:14:38

You don't really need to chat to others, although I think it is a normal place to vent off some of the accumulated stress. At any point, you are free to feel whatever is comfortable for you in regards to the school run smile

WaitrosePigeon Fri 24-Feb-17 16:15:01

I don't mind it. I dip in and out of conversations when I want to.

WindwardCircle Fri 24-Feb-17 16:21:24

This year the school run is much nicer. There's a group of about six mothers who are an absolute pita. They're quite cliquish, domineering and are always on some sort of crusade against the school of some individual. Their latest one is insisting that next year our class must not get a young female teacher as three years in a row we've had teachers go on maternity leave. I suspect that the HT groans inwardly every time one of them requests a meeting.

Anyway they all have younger children and now stand in a different part of the playground. For some reason all of the people with onlies and older children are just nice, normal people who are easy company.

pilates Fri 24-Feb-17 16:40:45

I think it says more about how you feel about yourself. If you portray negativity you will get it back. If you stand there with a face like a smacked arse people won't want to talk to you, (not saying this is you btw). If you smile and stay neutral, people will feel comfortable talking to you. Have I read it correctly you used to be part of a cliques and now are not?

CigarsofthePharoahs Fri 24-Feb-17 16:41:24

I'm definitely not a fan of the school run.
It's good for me to get the exercise, but yes, the hanging around and forced small talk does me in.
I do my best to arrive with seconds to spare. Fine in the morning, ds is a pain to get out the house anyway so usually I'm trying not to be late!
In the afternoon ds wants to hang around and play with his friends. I usually end up lurking in a corner somewhere, trying to stop my toddler escaping.

RoganJosh Fri 24-Feb-17 16:43:49

Is it just me that has a 15 minute gap between pick up of the different children? I'm always slightly envious of the option to just dash in and out.

nevermindwhatimdoing Fri 24-Feb-17 16:46:05

Have I read it correctly you used to be part of a cliques and now are not?

Yes, I used to flit around chatting to lots of people but in particular I would stand with a group of 4 or 5 other women who are very nice but also think they're better than everyone else. I just got bored with their constant boasting and talking crap.
I'm quite a bubbly person and know lots of people, but I just prefer to not have close friends. As soon as someone gets close I tend to push them away, other than hubby and family.

nevermindwhatimdoing Fri 24-Feb-17 16:46:50

Sorry, I'm not sure how to respond to a specific comment. I'm new here 😀

m0therofdragons Fri 24-Feb-17 16:48:13

Oh god I like about 5 parents out of 800 odd. Dh did it for a year and it was a dream. Now it's all in me again 😩

pilates Fri 24-Feb-17 16:51:49

Yes, I would avoid boasty parents like the plague.

I used to have a friend who moaned that no one spoke to her in the playground but she had such hostile angry face I could kind of see why.

KnackeredOldWoman Fri 24-Feb-17 16:52:24

I don't mind the school run, today I've spoken to a dad, a gran and a couple of Mums. All different personalities and interesting people. But sometimes I don't speak to anyone.

You sound uncomfortable in your own skin really self conscious. It's not a school run issue, you would probably be saying the same things if you joined a hobby group or evening class.

I sympathise but don't start making out, women are the problem. Everyone is different, you can't lump people together.

IamFriedSpam Fri 24-Feb-17 16:54:08

I feel quite lucky - haven't encountered any boasters - most of us are just moaners (latest meltdown, traffic, weather etc.). No one particularly get along with but so far seem nice enough people (no doubt I'll be eating my words next month and starting a thread about some awful school gate catastrophe!).

MrsXXD Fri 24-Feb-17 16:59:42

My DH has done it a handful of times when he's had the day off work, he says he shuffles around awkwardly in the vain hope he'll spot another dad grin

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