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to wish looking after a toddler wasn't so flippin' awkward?

(23 Posts)
INXS Wed 22-Feb-17 18:45:09

My 2 year old DD is awesome, hilarious, curious, funny and sweet, generally fab.

But sometimes numerous times a day I just hit this point where I want to shout in frustration because e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g is a battle, even when she's in a good mood.

Sitting on the floor, trying to get her dressed? She's standing just out of arm's reach, or turning around to face the wrong way.

Changing her nappy? I'll get her all settled and calm, then realise the wipes aren't to hand. I take 2 steps to fetch them but in that 2 seconds she's lost patience, rolled away and then screams when I try to start again.

If I make the grievous error of leaving a pen, pencil, or one of her crayons around, it invariably ends up on a wall or something important. If I put my phone down for a second she's on it, and screaming if I try to take it off her because I don't want her to break the screen again She always wants to touch the stuff I don't want her to, like the loo, and then hand washing has to involve a full five minutes at the sink as she turns the tap on, sprays water around, and then complains that her clothes are wet.

Eating is a disaster as she simply won't eat a full meal, but wakes up starving in the night. Similarly, sleeping is awful as she can now get out of the cot and she won't stay in her big bed.

Right now, the ONLY thing she will play with is Laughing Cow triangles, which she screams for then carries around til they are soft and melty at which point they make everything she touches a mess.

I know this is all normal toddler behaviour, but it's just so bloody draining. AIBU to let it get to me so much - does anyone else find this stuff just really tiresome and boring? sad

sabzii Wed 22-Feb-17 20:14:53

My DD is 18months, fun but exhausting! I always feel drained and shattered, but when she's at nursery I miss her painfully.

My advice is lots of groups, swimming, playgrounds and long walks so she's less hyperactive at home.

Pull-ups are easier to get on (mine runs off halfway through every nappy change). Make everything into a game eg getting dressed, packing bag, finding shoes.
I use reins everywhere outdoors unless enclosed play area.
AquaDoodle instead of pens or crayons as it doesn't mark.
Lots of socialising with other mums, makes it all more fun! We have lots of play dates where mums zone out on sofa with coffee and toddlers run around playing.

bookworm14 Wed 22-Feb-17 20:24:08

I hear you, OP. DD is 18 months and utterly exhausting. She's at nursery 3.5 days a week though which helps! grin Getting out every day is good, especially to the park or somewhere else they can let off steam.

Nappy-wise, I find Pampers Pants take some of the stress out of nappy changes as you can just pull them on.

DontFundHate Wed 22-Feb-17 20:24:37

Following. My 2yo DS is the same! Sarah ockwell smith has a new discipline book out next week, I love her so hope it's helpful

SprogletsMum Wed 22-Feb-17 20:27:39

Yep my dd is 2 and so frustrating.
Everything takes forever and has to be argued about before it happens. Luckily she's toilet trained now so I don't have the nappy issue anymore.
The toilet brings a whole new irritation though. She'll go to the toilet, be finished, wash her hands, come out and shut the door then want to go again straight away.
She has to do everything herself even including all the things she can't do.

Applesauce29 Wed 22-Feb-17 20:31:59

It's the constant whinging that gets me, and the going floppy and being stubborn if he doesn't get his own way. And the tantrums for no apparent reason: we once had ten minutes of "I want to hit mummy's hair"! Two and a half - hoping this stage will end soon.

HungryHorace Wed 22-Feb-17 20:33:09

We have a 3.8 yo DD and a 2.7 yo DS. It's non-stop fun, fun, fun in our house! 😩

When they're happy and playing nicely, it's great. That's only about 35% of the time, however. Sigh.

mainlywingingit Wed 22-Feb-17 20:36:15

I hear you (I've just ore ordered that book) today was a slightly worse day than normal:

At least 60 tantrums mainly lasting 10 seconds but some longer. General destruction and new Home
Made foods made and thrown on floor. So
Wilful he has to do EVERYTHING himself.

Exhausted ! But love him So Much ! But yes it's Groundhog Day at the moment and some sunshine would help!

nannynick Wed 22-Feb-17 20:37:54

Toddlers are great. You have described a typical experience of anyone caring for a toddler. They are fantastic, I really enjoy that stage. Just try not let it get to you and see how she is developing her personality. Provide things to help her - want to carry something messy around with you, lets find a nice bag for that. Getting dressed... make it a game... can you do x by the time y song has finished. Can you sing Twinkle Twinkle while putting on your t-shirt?

I doubt I am the only childcare worker who loves the toddler stage. Though it is nice when they sleep!

passthenutella Wed 22-Feb-17 20:38:56

I could have wrote this post OP. I'm currently lying in DDs big girl bed with her as it's the only way she will stay in it. Her new word is no and it's her answer to everything.
I work every morning and I swear it helps keep me sane. She also stays on at nursery one afternoon a week which gives me time to myself time to clean without the feral one
I just keep telling myself it will get easier as she gets older. And its so worth it for the cuddles and toddler kisses
Your not alone OP brewcake

Zaralara Wed 22-Feb-17 20:51:19

My toddler is 20 months and yes it is exhausting. All just as you describe. All completely normal though too.

I try to get out in the morning, let him have some fresh air, then he has his lunch then a nap and I will have my lunch in peace and quiet, if I'm not at work and I need to I even have a power nap while he sleeps.

Just try to be patient and remember they're not doing any of it on purpose, they're just learning everything.

I've got a big gap between my two and from what I can remember it all gets much easier and calmer around age 2.5-3. It goes so quick so try to just enjoy all the funny and cute bits.

CazY777 Wed 22-Feb-17 21:17:32

My 2 year old is just like that at the moment. She's very funny and loveable, but why do they have to make everything so difficult at this age! Teeth and hair brushing is the worst for us, I have to chase her round the house and get her in a corner to do her hair and sometimes I can't be bothered with the fight. But teeth brushing has to be done and its a nightmare, I try to get her to do it herself but it always ends up in a mess with tears and toothpaste everywhere. Anyone have any tips to make tooth brushing easier?

DizzyFizzyLizzy Wed 22-Feb-17 21:22:36

Ah, I have found my people. My two year old daughter does every single one of these things. I feel relief - she's normal. I'm normal. It's a bloody hard age but they're so adorable and loveable at the same time.

DD is utter sweetness and light at nursery as well.

Frouby Wed 22-Feb-17 21:24:24

I look for dinosaurs in ds mouth as we brush then scrub them away!

Ds is 3.3. He is funny, loving, bonkers and slightly mad. But very hard work. Fresh air is his medicine to cure the madness. Fresh air and swimming wipe him out.

Things are just starting to get slightly easier. We 'negotiate' a lot. I bribe a lot. I sometimes just give in. But it is getting easier.

DizzyFizzyLizzy Wed 22-Feb-17 21:25:02

Caz does she like stickers? We put a sheet of cardboard on the wall and bought some Peppa stickers. Every time DD allowed us to brush her teeth, she got to put a sticker on the wall. DH was sceptical but it worked a fucking treat. Now she will do it as part of her routine without the sticker. I'm not saying she's never awkward about it but 99% of the time she will tolerate it.

CazY777 Wed 22-Feb-17 22:04:32

Thanks for the suggestions. She loves stickers so I'll give that a try.

LilacSkyes Wed 22-Feb-17 22:59:16

Am in the exact same situation. DD is 2.5, so clever, funny and lovely most of the time. However, I found myself (last week) carrying her under my arm (like a carpet roll) whilst kicking, screaming and pulling, and pushing 5mo DD in pram, because I wouldn't let her lick the clothes in primark blushconfused
I feel your pain.

INXS Wed 01-Mar-17 23:19:57

Gosh I thought my thread had sunk without a trace - but, lookee! I'm not alone. You all feel my pain.

I do love her but sometimes, SOMETIMES, I actually need to leave the house in a timely manner!! Today I had to open the door and pretend to walk out before she would consent to getting dressed.

We had an Aquadoodle but we had to get rid of most of our stuff so it is no longer sad the thing is, she doesn't even like drawing - unless it's on furniture/documents/anything other than where I want it.

TheFullMrExit Wed 01-Mar-17 23:32:36

Op I hear you. We we just coming through this phase it's taken a good two years, every thing has been negotiated, opening door, opening car door, pressing buttons first, whose cup, drink etc and with the food perhaps the most stressful of all, as a parent you need to see you dd eat sad it's soul destroying making endless foods and all rejected or bird picks. as long as doc says ok weight you just have to roll with it. Hard when other dc seem to sit and happily eat for ever with tons of snacks. On pen my walls are covered in places, I have made choice to not care and look forward to lovely paint job when she is five and past this stage. Pen marks on wall won't kill you, stress however does and you have enough on your plate. Age five is the pay-off its amazing land of unicorns and rational child grin

INXS Thu 02-Mar-17 08:08:48

"Age five is the pay-off its amazing land of unicorns and rational child"

Really?! That's so nice to hear!

My friend who works in childcare said to me "well, I think 3 is worse" ... noooooooo...

Elendon Thu 02-Mar-17 08:52:56

I just loved the summer before my youngest daughter went to school. As a big treat her and I went to a posh cafe and had cake and juice (I had coffee). It was a lovely day out. It broke my heart when she skipped off to reception with stopping to turn and wave and then straight into class. I went home and had a weep.

However, I understand the frustration between 2 and 3. You love them dearly but they drive you nuts sometimes. Those little battles are cries for independence. I used to have cries of 'I can do it!'. Summer dresses in knee deep snow, a big jumper on a hot summer's day. Quite frankly there were times when I'd rather be brokering a peace deal in a war torn country and then escaping to an island, cut off from civilisation

SpookyPotato Thu 02-Mar-17 08:58:03

My nearly 3 year old drives me nuts, I love him but he is a little loon! Toddlers are basically little loony, hyper, angry drunks grin Only a few years to go...

INXS Fri 03-Mar-17 13:43:46

Aaaah she is so sweet. I'm trying to remember the good stuff and also NOT BE IN A RUSH, like, ever! As that is when the trouble starts..

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