DH and I have had a ridiculous year. Accidental pregnancy, move across continents to have baby, DH having to retrain to stay in UK, DH having to leave me and tiny baby for 6 weeks due to visa issues, me starting own business...
We live in a 2-bed flat and our baby is 8 months old. We can't afford to move because London. I have just about come out the other side of PND.
Since 1 month postnatal, PILs were pushing for SIL to come live with us while she studies. They are from a culture where this was an impossible request to refuse, but I staged a mini coup and managed to push it back til baby was 6 months.
SIL has a serious mental illness. It has become apparent that she is much more unwell than I or dh thought and will likely need to live with someone for the rest of her life. The course she wanted to do is impossible duemail to her MH, and she is unlikely to be able to hold down a regular job. Essentially, it looks like she'll be living with us long term.
I am totally up for caring for her. I would want to do the same if my sis was ill. But. But but but. I feel manipulated by PIL - again this is partly cultural but we have had no actual convo about this, I feel like they've just decided they don't want to care for her anymore and shipped her over to us. Her behaviour is really exhausting - she's my age, but mentally like a pre teen so after a day of childcare and before working into the early hours of the morning I feel like I'm basically doing more parenting (DH is mainly at uni til late). I have literally no time to myself, so while the will is honestly there to care for her I feel super overstretched and resentful. I know it's not her fault and I know firsthand how shitty MH can be...I just feel like I am running on empty as it is, with nothing more to give.
Help? Hand hold? AGH.
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AIBU?
To be about to spontaneously combust in DH & SILs' general direction?
96 replies
WeiAnMeokEo · 22/02/2017 18:25
OP posts:
morningrunner ·
22/02/2017 18:43
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FrancisCrawford ·
22/02/2017 19:05
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