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To burn my sons exgf stuff....

(278 Posts)
imnotpregnantanymore Tue 21-Feb-17 03:29:06

After shes burnt all of his and publicly shamed him on facefook.

He left quite a bit with her. New clothes that i had brought for him and she wore and never brought back. PS3 and PS4 games,music cds,and sone other peraonal items including a blanket his grandmother gave him as a baby.
He tried to arrange to get them back. She went total bitch on him. Shes burnt them. Put pics alongside nasty comments regarding it all.
The girls fukin bitch mother has also liked the pics.

So... aibu to do the same but minus the silly public pics and comments. My son is all for it.
Im fuming angry

imnotpregnantanymore Tue 21-Feb-17 03:30:42

Oh dear total strike fail..
fukin bitch
I need sleep.

abbsisspartacus Tue 21-Feb-17 03:31:22

No you contact the police like a grown up you will possibly need to take it to small claims but you have evidence as long as you have copied the pictures she posted

Grindelwaldswand Tue 21-Feb-17 03:31:56

How about you grow up and call the police like a sane person

user1477282676 Tue 21-Feb-17 03:37:13


"Bought" meaning purchased in a shop.

"Brought" fetched something somewhere.

"Fucking" expletive..never fukin.

YABU. Tell the police.

MrsChopper Tue 21-Feb-17 03:50:04

YABU. Grow up hmm

sibys1 Tue 21-Feb-17 03:58:29

Take a screenshot of the picture. Contact the police.

daisychain01 Tue 21-Feb-17 04:04:08

Act the grown-up here OP, do you really think it's good to destroy a person's belongings, and show your DS that's how you deal with a relationship break up?

No, suggest to your DS that even though he's been hurt, there's no need to lash out and be spiteful.

Also stay out of his life, interfering, he is a grown up, let him handle this for himself.

cariboo Tue 21-Feb-17 04:11:15

Agree with PP. Also, how the hell do you go about burning things? It's not like you can chuck it into the fireplace & strike a match. Even a bonfire wouldn't do it, unless you had a massively large one.

IamtheDevilsAvocado Tue 21-Feb-17 04:14:09


IamtheDevilsAvocado Tue 21-Feb-17 04:15:10

That will be much more effective than any other revenge... Also it is criminal what she has done I think

PyongyangKipperbang Tue 21-Feb-17 04:28:17

Contact the police. What she did is criminal damage at best. Best revenge ever is making sure that her shitty behaviour follows her around for the rest of her life, especially if she has her sights set on a career where a DBS is needed.

My son spent months saving up for the engagement ring his GF wanted. Three weeks after getting it she dumped him and kept the ring despite knowing what it cost him in hours of overtime to pay for it. What I felt like doing then is not repeatable, so I understand how you feel, but lowering yourself to her standards is not the way to go and I am sure that deep down, you know that. Funnily enough, her mother was a piece of work too, the apple doesnt fall far from the tree in my experience.

Sick of people who insist on ignoring the issue in order to pick on someone elses grammar, spelling and syntax. Bullying is vile user1477282676, and you shame yourself by your words

FenellaMaxwellsPony Tue 21-Feb-17 04:32:24

Are you 12? No? Then of course it wouldn't be ok. 1. It's your son's relationship - none of your business. 2. Is what you want to teach him about relationships really spite and tit for tat? The ex-GF may have acted in anger, you would be acting in pure malice. Your son should call the police if he wants recourse.

whattodowiththepoo Tue 21-Feb-17 04:32:33

Go after her legally, the fear she will go through will be more painful than losing her stuff and then hopefully she is punished by the legal system.
Be the bigger person.

imnotpregnantanymore Tue 21-Feb-17 04:36:36

Im not interfering,my son asked to do the same and i said no.
However since seeing such delightful pictures perfectly spelt for pedantics on crappy facefook im thinking twice. I will go back to being sensible mum and telling son no.
Ive never ever done anything like that either. I suppose seeing and reading these things in a place where everyone qho knows my son can also see and read just made me feel disheartened and sad for my son. Hes already depressed due to this girls shite behaviour.
Nope i will stick to encouraging otherwise. Well it was a nice thought for a few moments.
Also,what on earth would police do? They did nothing when said exgf was threatening to kill son.

Happinessisthis Tue 21-Feb-17 04:40:00

Gosh, OP, she sounds awful!
I can't believe the response here. I got from your post, that although burning the stuff would give you great satisfaction, you wouldn't actually do it.
I'm so sorry your son is having to go through this. How old is he? Hopefully in a few months he can look back on this and realise he had a lucky escape. Anyone that is enabling her actions is pretty messed up too, but that's the internet for you.
Hopefully that's the last of it and the less reaction she gets, the more likely she is to leave your son alone

FenellaMaxwellsPony Tue 21-Feb-17 04:41:32

It's criminal damage, for which you say you have photographic evidence.

littleoldladywho Tue 21-Feb-17 04:43:15

So hard to know what goes on in anyone else's relationship - it's always better to stay well out of it and offer platitudes for support. It's pretty much guaranteed that if you act like a child and set fire to her stuff that they will be back together next week, or you will find out the darling boy slept with her bestie or something heinous (her mother?) Stay well away and let them sort themselves out (and don't get into badmouthing either her or her mother - you have no idea what the truth of the situation is).
Soothe ds. Move on. Ds can chalk it up to experience. I have never yet heard of a psycho ex that hadn't been, erm, well-provoked, so maybe he will conduct himself (and the ending of his relationships) in a different way in future. Or choose less volatile partners.

lorelairoryemily Tue 21-Feb-17 04:43:22

User1477....grin I always want to do that!!! It's BOUGHT!!!

PyongyangKipperbang Tue 21-Feb-17 04:45:18

Screenshot the facebook photos including the comments in case they are taken down, they are your evidence.

Sadly a threat made that is his word against hers is unlikely to be taken further as there is no evidence, but if you save it now, then you have the evidence of what she did.

FYI I find it unlikely that she burned his stuff tbh, more likely she sold it, but if she uses that as a defence then she is guilty of theft so either way.........

TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder Tue 21-Feb-17 04:47:20

How old are your son and exgf OP? What she did was very wrong, but is it possible that she has had her heart broken here and is lashing out in a very immature way? I had a horrible boyfriend who cheated on me with my friends, messed with my head and destroyed my confidence when I was a teenager. I think burning a couple of his t shirts would have been him getting off extremely lightly (not that I did).

Best revenge ever is making sure that her shitty behaviour follows her around for the rest of her life, especially if she has her sights set on a career where a DBS is needed

This is disgusting. You don't know how old these people are, or any of the facts surrounding the breakup, but you are happy for a potentially very young girl to pay for a case of badly handled heartbreak for the rest of her life? Just horrible.

imnotpregnantanymore Tue 21-Feb-17 04:50:11

Yes i have screenshots of it all. She quickly blocked me but as im using fb from the internet and not an app,when ingo back it takes me back to the previous page. I also managed to get screenshots off her friends wall too. They have all the status comments on.
Yes this girl was and still is the nightmare my son removed from his life last october. 4 months later amd shes still there in the background causing trouble. Son is 18 nearly 19 and is very laid back about most things. Apart from this and her.
Hes also never done anything like that and has never thought to either...till he saw the pictures on a friends computer.

Hea now sat up in his room,in despair wondering what this girls next move is.

imnotpregnantanymore Tue 21-Feb-17 04:54:24

Also..he didnt sleep with anyone else,however if you ask her what she got up to whilst my son was at college..
Son aint perfect,but she was vile and encouraged by her very jealous bi friend who even admitted she wanted exgf to herself.
Its those 2 in the pictures. Smiling away. angry

BathshebaDarkstone Tue 21-Feb-17 04:57:41

YANBU to think it, YWBU to do it. It is criminal damage, really go to the police.

littleoldladywho I had a psycho ex who was completely unprovoked, he was paranoid, jealous and delusional. He used to drink, he was allergic to alcohol, and take plant based substances.

Henrysmycat Tue 21-Feb-17 04:58:06

I don't understand your point, Theresabluebird . If you're old enough to have a relationship on this level, you are old enough to deal with your shitty behaviour. I've had my heart broken very badly. Heartbreak that took me years to even look at another person for romantic involvement but it didn't mean, I could burn my ex's stuff or house down. Get a grip. Burning his childhood blanket is a insane, spiteful and criminal thing to do, why should she be forgiven?

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