DH and I have been together 10 years, married 3. Prior to marriage we had a long discussion about children, I was on the fence, he really wanted them. I agreed to potentially 2, but with a have one and we'll see caveat, he agreed.
We had DS last year. I love DS but hate being a mum, had a dreadful birth and never want another child ever. I know I'm done. DH still desperately wants another. DS is 18months. I have said on several occasions that I don't want any more, I don't like being a mum, don't want to bring a child I don't want in to the world etc etc. DH is understandably devastated. I don't get the whole 'desperately wanting kids' thing, I didn't get broody for DS, so whilst I can be empathetic, I certainly don't get where he's coming from.
I'm keeping him from the one thing he desperately wants. We've discussed splitting up so that he can have a family with someone else but he doesn't want to do that, doesn't want to have to explain that to DS when he's older. I also think he's secretly thinking I'll change my mind, despite me being clear I won't.
I don't want him to leave me, I love him very, very much. But not enough to have another child I don't want.
I worry that he'll resent me over time, when it is too late for him to start another family (he has clear ideas of when he'd consider himself too old). I am considering leaving him so that he can pursue his dreams and I can stop feeling guilty (he isn't deliberately feeling guilty but his desire for a second child is palpable).
I just don't know what to do for the best.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
AIBU to leave him for his own good?
110 replies
babybitchface · 19/02/2017 19:52
OP posts:
HecateAntaia ·
19/02/2017 20:02
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HecateAntaia ·
19/02/2017 20:14
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