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To consider having a night out while off sick?

(54 Posts)
DoughnutsAreForever Sat 18-Feb-17 09:14:33

Have name-changed for this as anyone inclined to AS could find potentially identifying information but I am a long standing poster - Paul the spray-painted pigeon, wedding in Maui etc.

I work FT but am currently signed off with stress and exhaustion. Last year I bought tickets for DH and I to see a stand up comedian. That gig takes place one night next week. Part of me thinks a couple of hours laughing at jokes would do me the power of good, OTOH I still have a bit of a "if you're not well enough for school you can't play out" mentality and I suppose I'm a bit nervous about being spotted by a colleague and having it spread around the office that I can't be that bad etc.

It wouldn't be a full on night out with food and drink (I can't drink anyway thanks to the meds I'm on), it would literally be going to the theatre and straight home afterwards. Apart from anything else I'm physically not up to doing more than that at the minute.

AIBU to consider it? I'm genuinely torn.

(I'm about to get ready and head out to a counselling appointment so I will be disappearing for a couple of hours but will catch up with any replies afterwards. TIA)

BoredOnMatLeave Sat 18-Feb-17 09:16:43

I would because you've been signed off with stress and it might help you destress.

If it was D&V that would be another matter

TheProblemOfSusan Sat 18-Feb-17 09:18:02

I would ask my counsellor for reassurance actually, but street isn't like having a head cold so you need to treat it differently, and imho things like going out of the house and having a bit of fun area part of that, so you should go.

If you'd said clubbing till 6am and planning to drink until legless I think no, inappropriate because probably not helpful to your mental state but this sounds reasonable.

Tiptoethr0ughthetulips Sat 18-Feb-17 09:19:52

Go, it's been booked ages. The laugh will do you good. If anyone sees you then tell them you needed something to cheer you up.

I'd be a bit judgey if I saw a colleague out with a slipped disk etc but not stress. Getting out is part of getting better surely?

DoughnutsAreForever Sat 18-Feb-17 12:39:55

Thanks for your thoughts. The way I am at the moment I'll probably keep changing my mind right up until it's time to leave for the theatre, but this is helpful.

Susan I never even thought of asking my counsellor, how dim of me. I have a GP appointment next week before the show though so I'll mention it to her.

JuneBuggy Sat 18-Feb-17 12:41:55

Yanbu, it will help your recovery. Stress & MH "sickness" is not the same as physical sickness and should not be treated the same. I had the same dilemma when signed off for anxiety.

Go, and enjoy it smile

harderandharder2breathe Sat 18-Feb-17 12:44:01

Go! The worst thing for mental health sickness is to stay home and not do anything or see anyone.

MatildaTheCat Sat 18-Feb-17 12:45:34

Definitely mention it to your GP,mshe will no doubt say you should go.

Tiptoe as a long term chronic back pain sufferer which started as a disc prolapse,can I point out that keeping moving is the recommended treatment and not house arrest. I wouldn't have been up to a theatre due to physical pain but I wouldn't have wanted judging for daring to leave the house.

floorboard Sat 18-Feb-17 12:48:50

I agonised over this too, in my case a mini break to minehead.

My counsellor pretty much ordered me to go smile

Trills Sat 18-Feb-17 12:50:52

You should definitely go, and anyone who thinks badly of you for going is an idiot.

guiltynetter Sat 18-Feb-17 12:54:50

definitely go. what can be better to destress than laughing? you're not contagious, you don't have to stay in all the time.

Usernamegone Sat 18-Feb-17 12:55:49

I would go. It's a couple of hours out at a comedy club not a full on rave up until 4am. I'm sure your GP would have no problem with you going if you feel up to it. I work in HR and wouldn't have a problem with it smile

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Sat 18-Feb-17 13:00:27

Go, it is a step on the road to recovery. Have a lovely evening.

Arealhumanbeing Sat 18-Feb-17 13:00:30

I went away on holiday while off with stress. Contacted my employer beforehand to discuss it with them and they were fine.

Could you do that?

Arealhumanbeing Sat 18-Feb-17 13:02:26

Not that I think you need permission.

You might be able to really relax and enjoy it more.

Witchend Sat 18-Feb-17 13:07:28

Go. But don't put it on fb.

Hisstory Sat 18-Feb-17 13:08:09

Morally you would be ok to go but I wouldn't because I'd be afraid of someone seeing me and telling everyone at work. That would make me feel really stressed. confused.

It's not right but your work colleagues might not be so understanding.

Thornrose Sat 18-Feb-17 13:08:53

I hear you! I saw a colleague when I was walking on the beach while off with stress and anxiety and felt guilty!

I would say "Go" no question, no guilt.

GetOrfMyBin Sat 18-Feb-17 13:10:25

Definitely go - it is, as others say, something that will help you by you being able to relax and enjoy an evening out. My DH has severe depression and anxiety, he hardly ever leaves the house. I booked tickets a good while back to see a comedian which is happening next week. It's 50:50 whether we will actually go but I find when I do eventually manage to get him out of the house to go do something he is generally always glad he's gone afterwards. It helps a little. I hope you go and enjoy yourself smile

JustForYouHeresALoveSong Sat 18-Feb-17 13:13:06

When I was of with stress a few years ago, the GP told me to use the time to do precisely this sort of thing: lunch with people; walks in the country; nights out; having a good laugh... all of those are good for your mental health.

You don't have a broken leg or a contagious disease. You need to treat the illness you have. And laughter is the best medicine after all wink

Schwifty Sat 18-Feb-17 13:14:13

Witchend good point. I had a favourable experience though when signed off, went on a day out with an older relative who my friends love to bits and ask after, so I posted a pic of us together. I'd already booked tickets so I asked my HRM before going, she said it was fine and part of the healing process (off with stress / depression) and OK to post on FB. I wasn't gloating about being out, just saying she was well and looking fab and we had a nice time.

Doughnuts go and have a bloody good laugh, you need it!

Wolfiefan Sat 18-Feb-17 13:16:53

Do it. Absolutely go. It could well be just what you need.
The only time I wouldn't go to an event is if it involved me doing something I had been signed off as unable to do. So if my back was bad and I couldn't sit. Had told GP and work I couldn't sit then went to see a comedian and sat down for hours then that would be wrong. IYSWIM.

DoughnutsAreForever Sat 18-Feb-17 13:19:04

Thanks all. I could possibly mention it to my manager when I update work after my GP appointment, more in a "this is what I've got planned and what the GP says about it" way than asking permission maybe?

Witchend no danger there, I've come off FB and Twitter while I'm feeling like this as they were making me feel worse for various reasons. MN is my only social media pleasure just now.

venusinscorpio Sat 18-Feb-17 13:21:12

I would definitely go. But don't post it on social media. I know someone who got the sack for posting about going to a club when she was signed off due to injury from an accident. I'm sure she could have taken it further legally but she didn't. It can cause a lot of problems.

venusinscorpio Sat 18-Feb-17 13:21:32

Sorry cross post!

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