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I am BU, but does anyone want to join my pity party?

(8 Posts)
SleepyHay Mon 13-Feb-17 12:11:38

Feeling sorry for myself today.

A few years ago I had a nice house in a nice town. A good job, was starting to make friends where I lived and was fitter and healthier than I've ever been.

Then I got pregnant.

We've moved to the arse end of nowhere to be closer to family, I have to get in the car to go anywhere.

My career has stagnated as I don't have the brain capacity to update my skills and my idea of looking professional now is wearing something without toddler smears on.

I'm currently on mat leave with 2nd DD (10 weeks) who I suspect has reflux as she cries and is sick every time she lies flat.

I hate my house as it's cold and badly laid out. We are planning some renovations next year but I just want it to be done.

I'm also now about 2 1/2 stone overweight. My diet is crap and I survive on caffeine.

I had images of an idealistic family life living in the countryside and being a really happy, healthy mother. The truth is, I'm a bit scared of fields full of cows (there are plenty of these here) and I'm terrified of spiders, (there are shit loads).

I'm completely unmotivated, a bit crap at toddler games and can't seem to get my fat bum off the sofa.

I know I can change things but I'm really struggling to at the moment.

Please tell me I'm not the only one!

Stitchfusion Mon 13-Feb-17 12:15:19

That sounds like the story of every woman from my socioeconomic class. You are not alone.
But, it does get better.

JontyDoggle37 Mon 13-Feb-17 12:17:58

First job, get yourself out of the house, whether to a baby group or an evening class, and meet some people. Once you get that 'spark' back from having interactions, it helps you tackle all the rest. For the losing weight, join us on the MFP FOR WEIGHT LOSS thread, we're a friendly bunch who give each other lots of help.grin

thenewaveragebear1983 Mon 13-Feb-17 12:19:39

flowers
Nope, you're not the only one.

I'm on a 'career break' til dc3 goes to school, but I just can't enjoy it. I'm bored. Ds still doesn't sleep through and I'm exhausted. I never get a minute to myself, and when I do all I actually have to do is clean/laundry. I've committed career suicide and don't think I'll ever go back.

I too am carrying a few extra pounds that I can't really motivate myself to shift.

The weather's miserable, our house needs loads doing to it and I don't have the skills or money to do the great ideas I have, so I really don't like being in or out at the moment. Plus I'm skint as I'm not working. We've been perpetually snotty and ill since ds1 came out in chicken pox the week before Christmas- someone's been ill in our house continually since then. I'm so compassion fatigued from caring so much.

I've never felt so miserable to be honest, and I feel guilty saying it because people think it's such a luxury being off work and I feel like I should be more grateful. I feel trapped inside my life sometimes.

flownthecoopkiwi Mon 13-Feb-17 12:26:43

we just moved house. No heating. Lit fire, as the lounge warmed up got this huge whiff of dog diarrhea. Had wondered what all the stains were.

So, it could be worse.

Anyway, you had a baby 10 weeks ago. Your hormones are trying to kill you and your body needs a break.

Life is a marathon, not sprint. Set little goals and practice trying to find joy in little things. Like small squares of chocolate or doing a short HIIT workout on Youtube.

Start yoga on youtube. Then eat chocolate.

CigarsofthePharoahs Mon 13-Feb-17 12:37:14

I put my neck out this morning. Tried to sit up, felt like hot electric shocks down my neck and now it just hurts.
Had to negotiate a toddler round the supermarket today. It hurt a lot.
I'm tired.
Actually op, 10 weeks after having ds2 I had only just been able to stop wearing pajama bottoms the whole time and was back in... My maternity jeans. I then had to borrow trousers off my mum as nothing of mine fitted, and continued so for over a year.
Cows are weird, but not as much as sheep! Sheep have horrible eyes.

SleepyHay Mon 13-Feb-17 12:45:25

Thank you all for your kind replies.

thenew I know what you mean about the boredom, I think I'm going a bit stir crazy. At the same time I feel that I shouldn't be complaining as I've got a roof over my head, food in the cupboards, 2 beautiful, mainly healthy DDs and a lovely DH. It's such an adjustment from my old life and I thought that I was doing ok. It's also hard going from 2 incomes to 1 and not having the money to do things you used to be able to.
flown that sounds horrendous! You're right about the hormones. I've not been able to bf this time and consoled myself with thinking that my hormones would get back to normal quickly. Still waiting for that to happen. I know exercise will help, will have to force myself to start. Can definitely eat the chocolate though grin

SleepyHay Mon 13-Feb-17 12:50:39

cigars I have got my maternity jeans on as I type, apart from my maternity joggers, nothing else fits.
You are right about the sheep. Not long after moving in we took DD1 for a walk and were followed across a field by loads of sheep. Every time we turned round they stopped and stared. It was like a Hitchcock film. We haven't done that again since. DH is also crap with farm animals smile

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