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AIBU?

If someone says 'I adore you'

51 replies

gladiatorix · 13/02/2017 09:00

It really isn't the same as I love you, is it? Or AIBU?

OP posts:
birdladyfromhomealone · 13/02/2017 09:01

then I return with "I a window you too"

PurpleDaisies · 13/02/2017 09:02

More information needed.

Iwasjustabouttosaythat · 13/02/2017 09:02

Nope. It means they're on the way though.

Mottlemoth · 13/02/2017 09:03

No it's not.

elQuintoConyo · 13/02/2017 09:05

It means you are a fluffy bunny. Or a new pair of party shoes.

CannotEvenDeal · 13/02/2017 09:07

I say both to dh and ds interchangeably

pipsqueak25 · 13/02/2017 09:07

who said it ? is this a new relationship or one that might be on the way out ? sorry, but do need to ask.

Lostpangolin · 13/02/2017 09:08

If I told someone I adored them, I'd mean more than love, if you see what I mean? More all encompassing. I think love , like many superlatives, is an overused and somewhat devalued word.

NC1nightstand · 13/02/2017 09:12

Hmm is it one of those people who just cannot bring themselves to say it, because they would then be hitched to your wagon for all eternity/they are too cool for school/just not there yet/frightened that the moment they reciprocate you will trample all over their heart or do you think they are trying to let you know they don't feel the same but think you are bloody amazing all the same or do you think they do in fact love you and that's what they mean by adore you?
Like someone else said more deets needed OP!
But I type very slowly so you have probably already said.
In my book, Love is equality and adoration is putting you on a pedestal.

5moreminutes · 13/02/2017 09:13

adoration verges on worship and is different, less unconditional and less equal than love - more along the lines of the adored being on a pedestal I'd say.

That isn't necessarily how the person saying it meant it though - it could just be being used the same way some people say "I love spending time with you" or "I love you to bits" neither of which means as much as "I love you"

notarehearsal · 13/02/2017 09:15

Adore is to worship. I usually only use the term with the cutest small children. I don't think it's a totally healthy term to use for adult to adult, quite a lot to live up to

zen1 · 13/02/2017 09:19

DH said this to me after a week of dating (didn't know him at all prior to going out) and I remember agonising over what he meant exactly. 17 yrs later we are still together. Agree it means 'on the way to' falling in love.

statetrooperstacey · 13/02/2017 09:31

It's trying to say something really nice and impress you with a depth of feeling, but no it's definitely not I love you .
If you told someone you love them and they said I adore you in return then they were avoiding saying i love you back. I have done this.

MrsGuyOfGisbo · 13/02/2017 09:33

Means I love someone else/am still pining for someone else.
As a minimum, someone who is mean with words will be a nightmare meanie with time, money, affection, consideration,
Run!

gamerchick · 13/02/2017 09:36

then I return with "I a window you too

Grin

I think adore is pedestal territory. Not a good place to put someone.

Sherlock35 · 13/02/2017 09:39

I get told I am adored regularly by someone who very definitely does not love me in a romantic sense. So, it really depends on the individual.

Can you try and enjoy being adored for a bit? How do you feel about the person doing the adoring?

Magzmarsh · 13/02/2017 09:41

I love my dh but wouldn't say I adore him, I do however adore my dc, rightly or wrongly they are on a pedestal to me.

ElderDruid · 13/02/2017 09:44

Really need some more context.

It's better than I like you if that's any consolation.

AYankinSpanx · 13/02/2017 09:54

I'd only use it for my young DC.

To be honest, OP, I'd find it a bit...I don't know...weird, I suppose. Maybe a bit patronising somehow, like someone was patting me on the head for a Really Good Girlfriend.

'I love you' isn't overused or tired. It's perennial and meaningful every time someone says it for the first time to someone else. I don't want someone coming up with a creative way of not saying it!

skerrywind · 13/02/2017 09:54

My OH tells me that he adores me, and that he loves me. I don't mind a bit of worship, especially as he often does it with his tongue.

AYankinSpanx · 13/02/2017 09:55

for being a Really Good Girlfriend.

Obv, I've replied without an update giving any context, so you'll just have to work with it Grin

Auntymildred · 13/02/2017 09:56

It's the kind of thing my gay mates say to me when they feel I have been especially wonderful. My OH wouldn't say it. More details needed...

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gladiatorix · 13/02/2017 11:27

Context. Newish relationship, 8 months maybe. He says it to me quite often, actually. And every time he says it, all I think is that's not love. I don't think he means it in a pedestal kind of way, just more reassurance that he's onside

OP posts:
DontTouchTheMoustache · 13/02/2017 11:29

No its not but he might not be ready to say it. I don't say it in a relationship until I am.sure I mean it, you can't make that happen any faster than he is ready. Would you prefer he said it if he didn't mean it?

scaryteacher · 13/02/2017 11:36

I get told this by dh....32 years together and 31 years married this year. He tells me loves me too.

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