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AIBU?

To be very concerned about friends weight loss and eating habits?

127 replies

FriendIsActingStrange · 11/02/2017 21:39

This time last year she was a size 14 with normal eating habits and a normal attitude to food. Then one day she suddenly decided she was going to go on a health kick. All well and gone but fast forward a year later and I'm worried she is taking it too far.

She has lost a lot of weight and she is now a size 10 and tbh looks a bit too thin through her frame. Her diet now consists of salads, jacket potatoes and she will only eat homemade food and food she has prepared herself. She will only drink water or tea except on special occasions.

AIBU to be worried? She looks so thin now and so obsessive about food Sad

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FriendIsActingStrange · 11/02/2017 21:40

*for her frame
*all well and good

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HallowedMimic · 11/02/2017 21:41

Well it doesn't sound as though she's doing anything outlandish.

Not many people would look underweight at a size 10.

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ThatsWotSheSaid · 11/02/2017 21:41

She sounds really healthy to me. I wish I had her will power.

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AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered · 11/02/2017 21:42

How tall is she? If she's shorter than 6ft and is a size ten she'll be fine, it's just that you aren't used to seeing her slim.

Her diet does seem pretty restricted but if that's what works for her then leave her be.

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FriendIsActingStrange · 11/02/2017 21:42

Today for instance we met up with some other friends for lunch. Everyone else had a pizza and some wine but she ordered a salad, some fruit and a tea. This time last year she wouldn't have turned down a pizza Sad

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FriendIsActingStrange · 11/02/2017 21:44

Not sure how tall she is but I'm 5'7 and she's maybe a few inches shorter than me so I'd say about 5'5?

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Thelastusername · 11/02/2017 21:44

She sounds healthy. I can't understand why you would describe her eating habits before as "normal". If she was a size 14 then she'd have been overweight and therefore overeating, but then I suppose that's considered "normal" now. If she's happy then you should be happy for her.

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SprogletsMum · 11/02/2017 21:45

I think when someone goes from being "bigger" not that a 14 is particularly big, to thin, the people who knew them bigger think they look too thin.
When I was losing weight I was still a size 16 with a bmi of 28 when people were telling me I'd gone too far and looked too thin. I didn't at all I just looked skinny compared to how I was.
Saying that though at 5ft10 if I was a size 10 I would be too thin.

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BewtySkoolDropowt · 11/02/2017 21:45

I'm really confused as to what is bad about only eating homemade food or food that you make yourself. And even more confused about why drinking only water or tea is an issue.

Size ten is fine, unless she is super tall. She possibly only looks too thin as what is regarded as a normal size has become bigger. And I say that as someone where a size ten is a distant memory and impossible dream! Hmm. salad and jacket potatoes you say...

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SprogletsMum · 11/02/2017 21:45

Cross posted with you, size 10 at 5ft5 sounds about right. My sister is 5ft5 and looks amazing as a size 10.

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BewtySkoolDropowt · 11/02/2017 21:46

Cross post. Size ten at 5 foot 5 is absolutely fine.

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PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 11/02/2017 21:47

This time last year I wouldn't have turned down pizza. Can't stand it now!
Eating habits change. A size 10 is usually (not always) a healthy size to be.
Maybe keep an eye but at the moment I would say there is nothing to worry about

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WaitrosePigeon · 11/02/2017 21:47

Her height and clothes size are perfect.

I hope you've not said anything to her about this.

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carabos · 11/02/2017 21:48

If she's 5'5" and a size 10 then she probably looks pretty good. She definitely won't look "thin". Hmm sounds like she eats a good diet and has control over her appetite. Move along now OP, nothing to see there.

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HallowedMimic · 11/02/2017 21:48

If this turns out to be a reverse, I'm going to go and eat my own weight in pizza and salad.

I'll see if one cancels the other out.

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FeliciaJollygoodfellow · 11/02/2017 21:49

She sounds fine Confused. She's size 10 at 5ft5 she's clearly within normal levels and eating salad for lunch or whatever is hardly bad.

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FatOldBag · 11/02/2017 21:52

She sounds perfectly healthy. YABU to so overinterested in what she's eating and drinking and what size she is. If she wasn't eating and was underweight BMI (probably a size 6 or something) then you might be reasonable in being concerned, but a healthy diet and a size 10 - leave her alone and butt out if you can't be supportive.

Are you jealous at all? Or does it make you feel bad as her diet is better than yours or something? If so, do something about your own issues, and if not, just stop thinking about her business.

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MajesticWhine · 11/02/2017 21:52

YABU. Nothing you say sounds concerning. Good for her, wish I had her discipline.

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LostMyDotBrain · 11/02/2017 21:53

A restricted diet isn't necessarily an issue if it's a healthy one. And though you're not used to her turning down pizza, it's by no means an inherently bad thing. I think she's just changed and you're not used to ghetto way she now looks and conducts herself around food.

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pasturesgreen · 11/02/2017 21:54

Perfectly normal clothes size for her height.

Nothing odd with opting for a salad, fruit and a tea either. I'm also a size 10, pizza makes me horribly bloated and I don't drink. I do hope that my friends don't think I suffer from an eating disorder.

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GreatFuckability · 11/02/2017 21:56

people with eating disorders can be a perfectly 'healthy' weight too....when i was at my worst anorexic/bulimic I was a size 10. so looked fine. I really wasn't though. and obsessive/controlling eating is a red flag.
i'm not saying this woman is or isn't unwell, but someomes size isn't the only indicator of health.

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superturnip1 · 11/02/2017 21:57

When losing weight the most accurate method is to make food yourself so you know what's in it so you can count calories and run an appropriate calorie deficit to lose weight gradually. Size 10 at 5'5 is not underweight, unfortunately over 3/4 of the world's population carries an excess of fat, more in the UK, and perception of what a healthy level of fat is has been skewed.

Counting calories means eating out is hard, but avoiding things like pizza and eating light options is often the best approach to keep eating out without screwing up the diet.

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AuntieStella · 11/02/2017 21:57

There's absolutely nothing wrong with having salad for lunch!

Nothing wrong with cooking from scratch either.

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ShowOfHands · 11/02/2017 21:58

I'm 5ft 4", size 8 and eat only homemade food and drink only water. I'm probably a few pounds heavier than my ideal weight actually.

Your friend sounds a normal size.

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WhisperingLoudly · 11/02/2017 22:00

At 5'5" and a size ten I'd be surprised if she was any where near underweight.

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