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AIBU?

How (or where) do I log that H punched me (wekly) in the belly in front fo DC?

17 replies

ishallconquerthat · 11/02/2017 20:18

I don't want to call the police, but I really want to log it somewhere. It is a lot of microagressions (throwing a pistachio towards me, stuff that feels "too small" but are not fucking small!).

We are not from the UK, we live in London and have no family nearby. I don't work, I have no money, his money is not enough to pay the bills and every month we end up putting a couple of hundred pounds in the credit card.

Right now I'm so fucking fed up I want him to just disappear.

OP posts:

Report

DrivingMeBonkers · 11/02/2017 20:20

Domestic Violence : www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk/

GoesDownLikeACupOfColdSick · 11/02/2017 20:20

I don't know if you mean "weekly" or "weakly", but that really is not ok, sweetheart. Lots about this post is v unhappy by the sound of it.

What if he does it to the DC next? I think you know the answer already really

LIZS · 11/02/2017 20:21

Womens Aid

pipsqueak25 · 11/02/2017 20:22

you need to log this with the police as this is assault, and think about ways of leaving this person because although it is 'small' now it could very well get a lot worse.

Buzzardbird · 11/02/2017 20:25

Call Women's Aid 0808 2000 247. They will help you with what you need to do.

ShaniaTwang · 12/02/2017 13:19

Really hope you're OK. Please log with the police and contact women's aid. Totally unacceptable behavior. I experienced it and I left. So sorry you are going through it

Fighterofthenightman · 12/02/2017 13:35

You can't just 'log it' with The Police. You report it and they investigate it.

britbat23 · 12/02/2017 13:45

Yes. No such thing as 'logging' with the police. Either you are victim of crime or not.

Also microaggressions are an internet buzzword not a crime.

Having a pistachio thrown at you is an assault although you'll have to decide whether it's an assault of sufficient magnitude to warrant a complaint to the police.

Being punched in the belly, weakly or weekly, is an assault and warrants the arrest of your partner.

ShaniaTwang · 12/02/2017 18:55

Yes sorry I should have said that too; I tried to log dh incidents to police and of course, I had reported a crime and I had to give a statement.

MongerTruffle · 12/02/2017 19:17

Please log with the police

You can't "log" something with the police. If there's been a crime committed, the OP needs to report that and have it investigated. She needs to decide whether acts like throwing a pistachio (which could, in the most literal definition of assault, be classed as that) warrant police attention.

ilovesooty · 12/02/2017 19:19

You report to the police. Are your children of school age? If they mention this at school you may find that choice about reporting it isn't in your hands anyway.

HelenaWay · 12/02/2017 19:30

I never understand what people mean on here when they talking about 'logging' something. I've only ever heard it on MN.

Snoopysimaginaryfriend · 12/02/2017 19:39

I'm sorry I don't understand. In the title of the thread you said your husband punched you in the belly in front of your children but then mention 'microagressions' like throwing a pistachio. When you say 'wekly' are you trying to say 'weakly' as in 'not too hard' or 'weekly' as in he routinely assaults you.

I'm a police officer. If you call the police and report domestic violence we will investigate and arrest your husband if you allege a crime. We do not 'log' events and we do not leave victims to suffer at the hands of their abusers. You will of course have the option of whether you provide a statement or support a prosecution but I've lost count of the number of women who just want to 'tell the police in case something bad happens'. If your seriously injured or (god forbid) dead it's too late then.

Beth2511 · 12/02/2017 19:56

I have just escaped a horrendously violent relationship with 2 year old and 3 month old. There is so so much help out there, I can see now I would probably have been dead very soon. Yes there are times right now that life is hellbut it's better than my old life!

BadKnee · 12/02/2017 20:21

Just as a matter of interest, (and in addition to, not instead of all the good advice already posted), could you go to your home country? You mention having no family nearby. Would family take you in and help you start again if you went to them?

Take care OP - this is only likely to escalate.

Boiing · 12/02/2017 20:24

Please talk to Women's Aid - they won't pressure you and can help you learn about your options. For example you might want to check you and the child into a women's refuge (it's free). Don't let your child grow up thinking it's acceptable to hit women.

Migrainemate · 13/02/2017 08:29

I agree with the poster that mentioned returning to your home country where you would have support?

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