Long story short, I'm not that close to my mum. We don't have any real issues but we're not close, we're too different and since I was young I've never really got on with her.
She seems to think we should have the same relationship that some of her friends have with their daughters where they phone each other all the time and go out for afternoon tea. I'm lucky if I see her once a month which suits me fine. Don't get me wrong, if she asked me for anything I'd help her as while we don't get on, she's done a lot for me and still does by taking care of my dd a couple of days a week.
On Sunday I took her out for her birthday lunch. While we were driving to the restaurant she started talking about my cousin who'd visited me the previous weekend - I hadn't told my mum about this visit - not because I didn't want her to know but because I didnt think it was important and I hadn't spoken to her since it happened. She'd been speaking to my aunt (cousins mum) who was apparently amazed that my mum didnt' know about this. My mum claimed this was because "her (my aunts) daughters phone her all the time" and that my aunt probably just assumed because her daughter had told her that I'd have told my mum.
I know that sounds like nothing but the way she worded it felt like a dig at me and I did blow up a bit about it.
"Your aunt just thought that because x & y talk to her all the time that you would do the same!"
I'd like to point out, she never phones me - I think she forgets it's a 2 way thing. She did repeatedly claim she wasn't having a go at me.
During lunch however she was talking to my 2 year old dd and said a few times "don't you grow up to be like your mother". WTF - I'm sitting right there, taking her out for lunch having sent her some lovely flowers on her birthday and given her money for her holiday and she's still having a go!
Apparently she doesn't want dd to not want to visit her as she get older - she's constantly asking dd to tell her she loves her and seems to crave attention.
AIBU or was this another passive agressive dig at me for not being the daughter she's always dreamed of?
AIBU?
Or was this another dig at me?
kitkat321 · 07/02/2017 22:16
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