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Do I carry on with this guy?

(65 Posts)
user1485102013 Tue 31-Jan-17 18:28:00

Been dating a month. I like him and things are going well but he talks about sex all. the. time. I'm getting a bit bored of it.

We have good chemistry and he's really lovely. I have a habit of looking for issues so I don't know if that's what I'm doing now.

AIBU to consider ending things?

Lilaclily Tue 31-Jan-17 18:28:33

Can you ask him not to ?

Ilovecaindingle Tue 31-Jan-17 18:28:42

Does he expect sex every time you see him?

user1485102013 Tue 31-Jan-17 18:30:20

Yeah he does expect it. And don't get me wrong I enjoy it but not every time. There's still so much getting to know each other to be done and it feels like we've already settled in to the constantly shagging stage which I prefer to come once there's a bit more of a relationship built up.

ZigZagIntoTheBlue Tue 31-Jan-17 18:30:20

Like innuendo type jokes or a literal discussion about it every time?

user1485102013 Tue 31-Jan-17 18:31:40

Both Zig. He either talks about the sex we've had or sex we're going to have. Then when we're not talking about our sex he's making innuendo.

AnyFucker Tue 31-Jan-17 18:32:42


BookHunter Tue 31-Jan-17 18:33:11

Bin him!

BreatheDeep Tue 31-Jan-17 18:35:15

Does he talk about anything else?!

user1485102013 Tue 31-Jan-17 18:35:49

He says it's what people do when they first start dating. I'm fairly new to the dating thing but I'm pretty sure it isn't?

SenoritaViva Tue 31-Jan-17 18:36:09

I wouldn't

Mittensonastring Tue 31-Jan-17 18:36:19

Sounds tedious.

AnyFucker Tue 31-Jan-17 18:36:22


SenoritaViva Tue 31-Jan-17 18:36:25

I mean I wouldn't continue!

Mittensonastring Tue 31-Jan-17 18:37:11

Are you exceptionally young or naive or both?

mistressWiseGuy Tue 31-Jan-17 18:37:16

Certainly wasn't like that when I started dating my dp. That was seven years ago though. I don't think it's a good sign, especially if you're already feeling pressure to have sex that you don't enjoy.

user1485102013 Tue 31-Jan-17 18:37:23

And I hate to sound awful but he keeps making references to how big 'it' is. It's average and thats fine. More than fine. But don't brag about how big it is. Am I being a bitch?

user1485102013 Tue 31-Jan-17 18:38:19

I'm 27 and not naive. Just inexperienced in this online dating business.

StillMaidOfStars Tue 31-Jan-17 18:38:49

I think we're opposites, OP. I feel the first month should be constant shagging, especially if there's no apparent social/ethical/religious barrier to doing it in the first place.

Having said that, my husband and I waited for a while before we had sex, despite knowing it was serious (long time friends) and being wildly attracted to each other. Not sure why grin

It seems like he has a different approach, maybe more like the first throes of passion to enjoy, and that's not going to be compatible with your need for slower intimacy?

Mittensonastring Tue 31-Jan-17 18:39:02

By the way no one should ever have sex they don't want or like regardless if a casual hook up or a long term relationship.

OhhBetty Tue 31-Jan-17 18:39:32

Ugh he sounds awful. Get him sacked.....NEXT!!

AnyFucker Tue 31-Jan-17 18:39:59

I would put him right on the size aspect for a start

He sounds like a boring neanderthal. I bet he's a porn hound too

Why are you having sex you don't want, BTW ?

HattiesBackpack Tue 31-Jan-17 18:40:28

Honestly I think if this is a problem (and tbf it would have put me right off too!) then you can either stop seeing him, or have a chat and explain how you feel and go from there.

MyPatronusIsABadger Tue 31-Jan-17 18:41:09

'It's what people do' annoys me, if you've told him you don't like it then he should stop if he wants to be with you. It's not on, even if you do want to continue its weird that he's telling you he's 'big', who's he trying to convince? Why does he need his ego massaged?

StillMaidOfStars Tue 31-Jan-17 18:41:31

Ah, thread moved on while I was typing.

You met online, a month ago and you're not enjoying sex with him every time. Sack him. He's wants a casual shagfest?

And ugh to referencing the size of his dick.

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