aibu - shouted at him for scoffing all the biscuits(145 Posts)
lots of other stuff going on, and he has form for this. a little background, live overseas. went to uk in november, dm spent her hard-saved pennies buying him a whole bunch of his favourite uk chocolate. also bought the family in general a few boxes and tins of nice m&s biscuits.
bring it back. he took most of the chocolate and gave it away to his parents and brothers... i was pissed enough at that, as my dm doesn't save her money to buy treats for his family.
we've now started eating the biscuits. first box was m&s chocolatey biscuits - brought them out at dessert so everyone, him, me and ds can share. everyone has 1 or 2. then when no one's looking he goes back and eats 2-3 more by himself. so when i bring it out after dinner the next day the box is half gone.
just opened a tin of nice m&s shortbread (the ones they do for xmas time). i ate one last night. had to take sick dog to vet this morning, get back and half the tin is gone!!!
ffs, why can some people not control themselves and scoff the lot, when there are three people in the house who'd like to have some? i've now told him if he can't control himself and think of the other people in the house who'd like to have more than one out of the entire tin, don't have bloody any!
aibu? does this drive anyone else mad?
I'm assuming him is your partner?
Talk to him?
Hide the biscuits?
and aren't they his biscuits anyway? So surely he can eat as many as he likes
Um. If this is your partner you ate talking about he is a grown up and can eat as many biscuit's as he wants.
The chocolate was his, the biscuits were for the family.
It is greedy, OP, I agree. Can you ration him?
The chocolate was his to do what he wanted with as it was a gift from your mum to HIM
No, he shouldn't be eating everyone else's share of the biscuits so he shouldn't eat any more
In general, buy more biscuits as a family.
A grown man can eat as many biscuits as he likes surely? A child is different and may need guidance as to healthy eating.
I really hate it when people do this. It's just greedy and selfish.
Depends if he's eating other people's as well, doesn't it?
soubriquet - yes sorry, he's not very dear at the moment so hesitate to use the DH (as i said many things going on).
we've had a talk about this many times before. i've actually been embarrassed in front of friends, as he does this at parties and at restaurants too - say you have a communal plate of chicken curry, 12 pieces and 4 people. he'll go ahead and take 6 pieces of chicken for himself. or say there's a bowl of snacks for the whole party - he'll eat half the bowl of snacks, even though there's 20 people there.
yes and no to the biscuits being half his - he didn't pay for them, my DM did (out of the pennies she literally scrimps and saves, she's in council housing and on a very small pension), and they are meant for all of us. the stuff she specifically bought for him (i don't really eat choc bars) - he gave away. so yes, he's sort of entitled to his fair share, except he won't control himself and stick to his fair share - if i "let" him eat anymore, he'll finish the tin by the end of the day. and it's not like he's actually offering them around to me and DS - he scoffs them all down when noone is looking.
yes, he can eat as many biscuits as he likes, as long as he leaves some for others. we can't get these biscuits regularly - these are the fancy m&s ones, and we only get them when i (not he, cos he basically refuses to go) go back to the uk and bring them back.
i eat my sweet treats slowly - 1 or 2 biscuits a day, i'd like for my share of the biscuits to still be there when i'm ready to eat them.
"we've had a talk about this many times before."
What reason has he given for this behaviour?
"he does this at parties and at restaurants too - say you have a communal plate of chicken curry, 12 pieces and 4 people. he'll go ahead and take 6 pieces of chicken for himself."
Jeez. That's really - well, like he doesn't see anyone else as entitled to eat. Like they're not actually people.
I think you are going to have to divide them into thirds, he can scoff his as fast as he likes, you can hide yours & DS's and bring them out 2 at a time.
It's ridiculous but otherwise his greediness will leave you with none.
When you are given them in the future split them equally immediately. Then both eat what you want on your own timescales.
Neither of you are 'right' - I scoff stuff but am perfectly happy to have none in the house for months. OH likes to draw stuff out in a way I find infuriating. I tend to eat my share then put his half away, tell him where it is and leave him to it.
Ooooh I love biscuits. I'd probably have scoffed the lot too
It's not ok and no, an adult can't eat as many as he wants when in doing so he is eating everyone else's share too. That's called being utterly selfish.
He sounds greedy. To me, when someone behaves like that they are saying fuck you, i dont give a shit about you or if you might like some.
A reasonable person considers others. They don't wait until nobody is looking and then binge or go to an event and eat food meant for half a dozen people.
What does he say when you talk about it? Does he give a shit or does he do the whole (pile of bollocks btw) it's ' only' a biscuit (or whatever) thing?
Because it isnt about the item. It is about the attitude shown. Nobody else matters as much as my belly.
Separate them, put his in a tub, and tell him when his are gone he's not to tuck into yours and DS's share.
Sad that you should have to do this with an adult, but it's the only way I can see to stop him scarfing the lot, he sounds really fucking selfish.
No, a grown up can't eat as many biscuits as they want when it's an irreplaceable treat from abroad!
We buy fig rolls and jammie dodgers. The packets are opened and even my six year old can see how many biscuits will be his share and will never take more than that.
Your DH is a selfish greedy pig!
ugh, i hate how with the belgian biscuits the way he'll eat all the ones he likes the best, never mind that others might like those ones too, so i get left with the shitty ones to eat...
yes, thinking i'm going to have to make a "his biscuits" tin, and a "my and ds biscuits tin".
just ridiculous that someone can't be considerate and say to themselves, there are 3 people in the house to share this very limited number of UK biscuits. it's not like he couldn't go out and buy himself a box of generic biscuits from the shops that he could scoff that i wouldn't care about (i don't buy m&s type biscuits so we literally don't have any fancy ones like that except when i come back from uk, so it is a treat for all of us).
thanks for reading - i really just needed to vent.
Hecate What does he say when you talk about it? Does he give a shit or does he do the whole (pile of bollocks btw) it's ' only' a biscuit (or whatever) thing?
just sort of grunts an ok, and if pressed, says, ok i understand, and then goes ahead and does it again anyway. i had words with him about eating all the chocolatey ones last week, and here we are again.
they're also a special treat for DS, he's only allowed 1, maybe 2, a day. DS hasn't even had a look at the shortbread yet, i only opened it later last night and ate just one. this morning almost half gone.
soubriquet - surprisingly no. he's been working out more due to a job application he was doing so right now yes needs more calories... but those calories don't need to come from the family special biscuit supply, iyswim. we do have lots of other food in the house...
even before the working out, he wasn't really overweight. i actually don't know how he is so generally healthy as he binge eats on junk food all the time. if i buy a large bag of crisps i'll have to hide them if i want any as he'll eat the whole bag in 1 or 2 sittings. or a can of pringles - gone in less than a day. that type of thing.
I'd have given him his share at the beginning and hidden the rest. As for doing this at a restaurant, fucking hell! I really hope the other diners pull him up on it! 'Excuse me, there are 12 pieces and 4 of us, means 3 for each, so you'll be putting back 3 of those.' TBH, if someone did this at a communal restaurant meal I was at it would be hte last time I ever socialised with them again.
He's an immature, greedy, selfish pig when it comes to food so treat him accordingly.
Since he's eaten his share of the biscuits, hide the rest.
My dad used to be like that.
And he would eat the flavour everyone liked first so he could graze to his hearts content on ones we didn't like
Cost my mum a fortune buying crisps for him and she rarely got a chance to have any unless she hid some, because he has eaten them all
Oh. I see. Yeah the dinner party thing is terrible.
I once went on holiday with an ex boyfriend and took him out to dinner for the night, I was paying. Instead of getting desert we ordered cheeses. I went off to the loo (5 min) and came back to the table to see he had every effing last bit of cheese on the plate and all the bread. When I asked him about it he just said, 'I like cheese'. Yes! So do I!! Cheeky greedy decker, I dumped him after that.
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