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AIBU?

Jury service: AIBU not to use emergency childcare service?

31 replies

yummertron · 29/01/2017 21:28

Looking for some advice, from all, but especially anyone who has been in a similar situation.

I am due to start jury service tomorrow at 09.15. I have 2 DC (3, 15m) and a new nanny who started a few weeks ago. She normally works Monday and Tuesday, and my in laws do Wednesdays. For the (presumed) two weeks of JS we were going to use the nanny for Thursdays and in laws kindly agreed to do the Fridays in addition to their normal Wednesdays. So far so good.

However, my nanny called me an hour ago telling me she is poorly and will no longer be able to come to work tomorrow. I cannot ask my in laws as they are working tomorrow (and I would feel awkward asking anyway as they have already moved a lot of commitments to help with the Fridays). My parents live abroad. I have asked my sister, and whilst she very kindly offered to do the afternoons she is unable to help for the mornings as she is working.

I feel upset as I was looking forward to serving and had deferred my start date for my new job (due to start this weds) so that I could do this.

I am also concerned that the courts will not feel that a breakdown in childcare is reason enough not to attend. Has anyone had similar happen?

I don't feel it is fair on my DC to leave them with a complete stranger, but AIBU not to use some emergency babysitting service? And will I get fined!?

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candycoatedwaterdrops · 29/01/2017 21:34

I'm not sure what happens in this case but they've got stricter than they used to in previous years. You usually can't defer at such a late date but I'm not sure if this would count as an emergency.

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seesensepeople · 29/01/2017 21:35

if this is the first time you have been called you should be fine - phone the court first thing tomorrow

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Sabsy1 · 29/01/2017 21:56

I was meant to do jury service, but managed to get excused as I have a 20 month old and no childcare whatsoever. All my family is in another country and my dh is self employed. I didn't have any problems at all, but I replied as soon as I got the invitation through the post. Not sure what happens as this is now short notice for you.

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Sabsy1 · 29/01/2017 21:56

I was meant to do jury service, but managed to get excused as I have a 20 month old and no childcare whatsoever. All my family is in another country and my dh is self employed. I didn't have any problems at all, but I replied as soon as I got the invitation through the post. Not sure what happens as this is now short notice for you.

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janesmom · 29/01/2017 22:07

The Court should be ok, provided you call first thing and stress that it's beyond your control. They tend to be used to this sort of thing (have seen it from the lawyers, never mind jury!)

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Coconut0il · 29/01/2017 22:07

I haven't been in your situation but I think all you can do is phone as soon as possible and explain the situation.
I wouldn't leave my DC with a stranger either.

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halcyondays · 29/01/2017 22:10

Phone and explain your childcare has fallen through at short notice, they have a pool of people so will just choose someone else in the meantime.

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yummertron · 29/01/2017 22:15

Thanks all. Have been super stressed about it over the last 2 hours and my OH has been less than supportive, but now feeling a bit more reassured. And nice to know I'm not alone in not wanting to leave the DC with an unknown entity!

Was so looking forward to it too! Maybe they will let me do the latter half of the week. Fx.

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Catsize · 29/01/2017 22:38

It will be fine, especially if a large court centre. Yes, say you'll do the remainder of the 2 weeks.

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Akire · 29/01/2017 22:41

Could you OH not get emergency leave so you can at least get jury service out of the way?

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Notcontent · 29/01/2017 22:48

I have no experience of jury service, but i am sure you would be excused! Emergency childcare services may be a good idea in theory but not in practice - as you say, most people are unwilling to leave a child with a perfect stranger for a whole day. It's not fair to the child, no matter what age they are.

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Noodledoodledoo · 29/01/2017 22:59

Why can't OH take the time off as emergency care - what is going to happen if nanny is poorly again?

Things might have moved on but nearly 40 years ago my mum was told she had to go even though I was unable to go to childcare she had arranged due to the chickenpox.

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bonbonours · 29/01/2017 23:11

I think as you haven't started yet it will be okay.once you are on a case though it is a massive pain in the bum for the court if jurors are delayed/ill/have appointments etc. So I would try to make sure you have a childcare plan b in place for future days.

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RealHouswifeofBury · 29/01/2017 23:13

You will be asked why your oh can't look after the children while you do jury service. So be clear on your answer or they will make you go .

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Xmasbaby11 · 29/01/2017 23:24

First port of call should be your DP doing the childcare. Surely he does emergency childcare before you'd ask other relatives?

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leccybill · 29/01/2017 23:29

Why is your OH unsupportive?
What does he think you should do?

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gillybeanz · 29/01/2017 23:30

Why can't your oh look after the dc?
I think this will be expected tbh.

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unfortunateevents · 29/01/2017 23:33

If it was the first day of your new job tomorrow, rather than jury service, what would you do? Would your OH have taken time off for that?

Btw, I think it is pretty poor of your nanny to be taking time off ill if she has only been with you a few weeks. She would need to be pretty ill not to be able to drag herself in and just do a TV day with the kids.

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AndnoneforGretchenWeinersBye · 29/01/2017 23:39

Another one wondering why OH can't help?

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mirokarikovo · 29/01/2017 23:40

Hang on I was right with you until you mentioned OH. Is he the father of the children? If so then why on earth are you considering dropping your Jury service when there is a perfectly adequate solution in front of you. He has to get emergency leave from his employment because his normal childcare arrangements have fallen through.

Equality doesn't happen if you don't consider yourself equal.

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foxyloxy78 · 29/01/2017 23:45

Agree DH needs to step up! Hmm

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HelenaGWells · 29/01/2017 23:46

I was going to say can your OH not take the morning off and your sister do the afternoon? Hopefully the nanny can do Tuesday as usual.

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SundialShadow · 30/01/2017 00:02

My SIL had a pretty similiar situation. My tool of a brother busted his leg on a night out - one drink and a high pavement was all it look. He was in no position to lift a 3 month old and chase an athlethic 3 year old.

Presuming you are on the mainland UK and not NI - you can do the same.

She rang the jury duty hotline and left the message that her childcare had fallen through. She also emailed [email protected] from the hospital as she waited for her idiot DP to be released. The only weird thing was that she never heard from them to acknowledge her messages except for a letter that arrived two weeks later to give her notice of a fresh round of jury duty.

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ScarletSienna · 30/01/2017 00:07

I found them to be far more understanding than I imagined. Just let them know asap on the number they sent you. A few people didn't turn up when I was there but before a case starts its less of an issue as there are more jurors called than needed.

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altiara · 30/01/2017 00:12

I did jury service about 15 years ago, they had more jurors than necessary, I think this is so that if there is a long case (e.g. Murder case expected to take 3-4 weeks) then those who are carers have the opportunity to say they can't do longer, plus they need a pool of jurors to choose from.
Hopefully still similar but you don't want to suddenly be deferred a couple of weeks if you're delaying starting a new job as they tend to put you back on the rota quickly.

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