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AIBU?

To think why can't people just be happy for some people's achievements

48 replies

MsJamieFraser · 28/01/2017 20:00

My ds represented his County today in an althletics final tournament, out of thousands of children he was in the top 10 in althletics, he got gold in all his races and field games today and overall his team (his team was made up of another 9 children from across the county, who he had never met before) they finished in the top 3.

We are now waiting to hear if he's been selected for the championships in London, as parents we are very proud, he's a very sporty kid and sport is like air to him.

After the final , he had another event to go to and everyone was asking how he got on, and how he got picked etc...

Explained the process, que some parents saying their children didn't participate etc... the parents even got their children and asked them if they participated in the school tournament for the child to say Yes they did etc...

Then the parents piping up well my child did fantastic in that tournament... what the tournament they didn't even participate in if they had been invited today they would have won it Hmm and how it wasn't fair their children wasn't allowed to attend and they would be speaking to the school on Monday.

Dh got annoyed at this point and stated it had nothing to do with the school and was the county, so if they had a issue with them not being selected then it would be the council they would have to speak to, que them saying ds must have cheated Angry Ds heard this and then started asking how he was cheating for these parents then to say ds was being cheeky...

At this point I walked off with ds, and dh said he called them out on it.

We didn't go to this event to boast or brag, they asked how he got on! we told them and where then met with sour comments and cheating claims!!!

(ds couldn't attend his normal event because he had to attend this event today, so this was the reason why everyone knew ds was attending the county finals)

I was going to put his achievement today on Facebook (I don't live in the country I was born and I keep family and friends back home up to date with our lives on there) however feel I cannot do this now in fear of the sour comments.

Ds feels extreamly proud of his achievements today however all he's asking us now is why they think he cheated.

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RubySparks · 28/01/2017 20:04

Well done to your DS!

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MsJamieFraser · 28/01/2017 20:29

Thank you Ruby, I need to think of something to cheer him up, if I can I'll take him to his favourite activity tomorrow if I can get him booked in.

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cowgirlsareforever · 28/01/2017 20:32

Well done your DS. Lets hope he makes it to the Olympics one day.

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redexpat · 28/01/2017 20:37

Oh dementors. I hate them.

Well done to your ds!

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MsJamieFraser · 28/01/2017 21:01

Ah, hes never going to be an Olympian, he has his sighs set elsewhere, as long as he enjoys doing what he does then we will be happy.

I just don't get people somehow, for him, hes just a child, I don't get the negativity.

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harderandharder2breathe · 28/01/2017 21:11

How horrible some people are!

There should be some sports events that are open to all to participate in, because sport is fun and good for us all.

But there absolutely should also be competitive events like the one your DS did so well in (congratulations to him!). To say otherwise is like saying there shouldn't be exams because academic children do better than non academic children.

If adults are getting worked up about your child doing well at something, they need to get a grip! Who accuses a child of cheating at all, never mind in front of the child and their parents (barring officials with good reason obviously. That doesn't include busy body jealous parents)

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FinnegansCake · 28/01/2017 21:16

Well done to your DS, you must be bursting with pride.
Don't let these jealous joy-suckers spoil your day. They sound dreadful.

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Mumzypopz · 28/01/2017 21:27

They sound a bit rude. However I must admit there is a child who is an extremely good runner at our school, and the parents send tweets to the school twitter site almost every week telling everyone how well he has done at such and such a race. The school then retweet it. There's no doubt he's an extremely good athlete, but it does get a bit irritating. Not saying this has happened in the OPs case though. Other children might do extremely well at other things, but that doesn't get tweeted to 500 odd sets of parents.

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Tamesa · 28/01/2017 21:43

Congratulations.
It is the best feeling in the world when your child is successful. Don't let it be ruined by mean jealousy.
Good luck with selection. Your son will get so much from the highs, lows and discipline of competitive sport.
I am pleased for you

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MsJamieFraser · 28/01/2017 22:09

I asked dh to read this post and all he can comment on is my punctuation and grammar Grin I'm dyslexic

He says Thankyou for the lovely comments and that he's shocked at Mumzy post, I am also.

Is the child representing the school? And even then at a push they shouldn't be retweeting the tweets, dh reckons it's a family member of the staff or they are giving the school money Wink

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altiara · 28/01/2017 22:20

Well done to your DS!!
I think you missed calling them out on how if he cheated his way into county level how on earth did he win GOLD in every event at county level?!
As for poor DS, might be time he learnt that adults aren't perfect and these ones are just jealous.
I would put his success on Facebook as this is something your friends and family will definitely want to see and congratulate DS. Don't make it look like you agree with these jealous turdburgers - celebrate as you would normally.
If you get any jealous comments, remember 1) your DS is talented at athletics or 2) your DS is extremely talented at magic and has managed to use a confundus charm on a lot of people! Either way, pretty impressive AND definitely worthy of being in the school newsletter.

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Magzmarsh · 28/01/2017 23:05

Mumzy didn't say anything nasty, just gave her experience, no idea why either you or your dh would be "shocked" by it, over reaction much op? 😎

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PantyLiner · 28/01/2017 23:14

Other parents are sour that their child hasn't achieved what your DS has OP. Its that simple. What they don't realise is the time and effort your DS has put in to get him this far. Very Well Done to your DS. Be proud of him and ignore the haters.

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AmeliaJack · 28/01/2017 23:29

That seems to be an extremely odd reaction to being told that someone's child had done well in a sporting event.

I just can't imagine anyone saying "well my child would have done better if he'd been there, your child must have cheated".

That's really quite strange. Why wouldn't you just say "that's nice, well done you"

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dangermouseisace · 28/01/2017 23:52

Those other parents sound weird. Well done to your son and he deserves to be proud of himself, as he must have worked really hard to get placed where he did! And it's good for the other children in his school to have a pupil who does well…generally gives the others a nudge to do well in all sorts of things, and they can be proud that someone who has done so well came from their school.

Facebook his achievements- normal people are happy to hear when others do well as they are pleased for them! I couldn't imagine reacting the way other parents did about anything, and there are things (not sport) my kids are good at but I'm proud of everything they do, where they have put in an effort. The parents should concentrate on celebrating their own kids achievement/participation at whatever level they work at, rather than trying to make out that they should have been 'the best' and that they've been overlooked. What sort of message are they sending to their kids?

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Sunnysidegold · 28/01/2017 23:52

I think magz that the op was maybe agreeing with mumzy, in that they said it was a bit odd for someone to tweet the school.about achievements. I think it'sa case of sour grapes for the other parents, op.they asked- maybe werent expecting the clean sweep your son had and then felt they had comment on it. I sometimes think those wh have sour grapes are maybe those trying to love their own dreams through their children Confused

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DustingOffTheDynastySuit · 29/01/2017 00:10

Surely most schools would recognise the achievements of pupils outside school? I remember my school had a skier in the British squad and some talented horse riders, we heard all about them st assemblies and in newsletters but they were certainly not representing the school.
Also in today's set up I imagine the pupils at Mumzys school have small local sponsors or sports grant money etc for which they are well advised to keep up the publicity.

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elodie2000 · 29/01/2017 08:10

The other parents sound a bit thick!!
The fact that they think that everything children do is organised through school explains their 'confusion'.
I'd have loved to have been there OP! Sounds like they were going out of their small minds wondering why their precious offspring weren't 'included'!!

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elodie2000 · 29/01/2017 08:13

Surely most schools would recognise the achievements of pupils outside school?
Yes they do. They use student's ex-curr. achievements as PR/ marketing for the school even though they have absolutely nothing to do with the event that has taken place.

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KateDaniels2 · 29/01/2017 08:17

Tbf you see a similar attitude on here all the time. Not as over the top.

But there are always 'certain kids get picked for sports/school plays/ to represent the school and my child doesn't....it must because the parents are akways pushy towards the school/friends with the head teacher/on the PTA'

Its not that unusual, no matter how petty it is.

Well done to your son OP

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Aebj · 29/01/2017 08:19

Well done to your ds. What an amazing achievement. He should be very happy . Hope you tell him MN think he's fab!

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OhhBetty · 29/01/2017 08:22

I just can't believe anyone would make the comments that these parents apparently have. It seems ever so strange and I've never heard of anything like it! I can't imagine saying anything other than well done to your ds. Even if you were the type to brag about it constantly (not saying you are) I just wouldn't say anything to you! I'd still say well done to your ds though as he's done all the hard work.

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Batfurger · 29/01/2017 08:24

What's wrong with the school doing that mumzy OP, you sound like a hypocrite for thinking they must be paying the school!
Or sorry, your DH who is somehow validating your existence on MN this morning is being a hypocrite.

You sound very invested in things, take a step back and don't get involved in other parents who "know nothing".

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Kirstyinnorway · 29/01/2017 08:25

no idea why either you or your dh would be "shocked" by it, over reaction much op? 😎

OP and her DH were shocked by the actions of the school, not the child/parents; maybe have a bit of a closer read before taking a little dig at OP magz...

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Kirstyinnorway · 29/01/2017 08:26

P.s. Massive congrats to your son, OP!

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