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to go away without dd?

(17 Posts)
DorothyL Sat 28-Jan-17 08:30:55

For the last few years we have spent a couple of nights every Feb half term in London.

This year dd2 will be on a school exchange trip so we have booked to go with just dd1 and ds.

Dd2 said she was fine with this at first but now she's getting upset at the thought of missing out.

In previous years we did this trip without ds when he was too young and we have been on three trips without dd1 when she was on school trips etc, so technically it is fair that this time dd2 misses out on something

Dd2 feels very upset about it now - though she said ok at first and I have already booked the hotel!

DorothyL Sat 28-Jan-17 08:31:36

Dd2 is 13, dd1 15 and ds is 10

SheldonCRules Sat 28-Jan-17 08:32:33

Seems a weird way of doing things, so if they go away with the school they don't get to go on the family holiday?

Why would you not just pick a date round those few days?

PotteringAlong Sat 28-Jan-17 08:32:36

Point out to her the times she has been and the others haven't and then go.

rjay123 Sat 28-Jan-17 08:33:00

Of course it's ok. It's not like you are leaving her at home!

DorothyL Sat 28-Jan-17 08:34:35

We've still done family holidays as well with all of them as well

LIZS Sat 28-Jan-17 08:35:55

Definitely ok.

DorothyL Sat 28-Jan-17 10:54:13

Ok will try to brace the storm though it's hard seeing her upset

LIZS Sat 28-Jan-17 10:57:42

She's already getting her own trip!

BarbarianMum Sat 28-Jan-17 11:02:04

Teens have the ability to get very upset about things that are perfectly fair. Tell her (in the gentlest possible way) to give her head a wobble.

NavyandWhite Sat 28-Jan-17 11:02:25

She's happy to go away with school but doesn't want you to have a break though?

She'll get over it I'm sure OP. Will you all be going somewhere in summer?

Bluntness100 Sat 28-Jan-17 11:03:18

I'm not sure of the attitude of "technically it's fair she misses out" it sounds like you booked it so specifically she would miss out?

It's booked now and if she's away the whole week it's fair enough.

GinIsIn Sat 28-Jan-17 11:05:33

I think I would have arranged the trips so that nobody missed out from the start, but it's too late for that now. It's not like she's going for a root canal whilst the rest of you go away - I think you just need to tell her to suck it up as otherwise it is unfair on the others for the times they've been left behind.

NavyandWhite Sat 28-Jan-17 11:08:10

We've done similar OP. Ds went away for 3 weeks with school in year 11 so we made use of that time and went to Mauritius with youngest Ds. He could hardly complain!

Soubriquet Sat 28-Jan-17 11:08:18

Yanbu

I missed out on a family holiday because I HAD to do my work experience for college.

My family went away for 2 weeks

I was upset at missing out but I knew I couldn't go if I wanted to pass my course.

So I got over it

DorothyL Sat 28-Jan-17 11:10:28

I didn't book it specifically for her to miss out - we are going when we always go, she just happens to be somewhere else.

With the trips before -
ds was too young but we wanted dd's to experience London

Dd 1 goes away every Oct half term to stay with a friend abroad and we felt that there was no reason the rest of the family had to stay at home when she was off experiencing new things.
We will go on a family holiday in the summer.

MrsJayy Sat 28-Jan-17 11:11:54

Oh that is a shame she feels like she is missing out on the family trip it is just one of those things you power through she will get over it She is young and expecting the world to stop turning because she is away. Go on your planned trip and dont let her sad face get to you.

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