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AIBU?

to not want to learn to drive in a 7 seater MPV?

6 replies

Vandree · 27/01/2017 13:18

Baring in mind I am a (very) nervous learner and would be expected to practice with 3 kids in the back seat and have no one to actually sit in the passenger seat other than for an hour at the weekends also? Plus I hate driving in it and am useless trying to park in it much less at the tiny.school carpark. This is my second attempt at learning. I tried a few years ago after not be able to walk much after having major surgery and 2 children close together and suffering with SPD for years. I'm finally at the stage where the other 2 are in school and my youngest literally started playschool 2 weeks ago and have some time to put into finally sitting my test. Its been booked and paid for and I am just waiting on my date. I have completed my 12 EDT lessons (ireland) and had a lovely instructor who really calmed me down so that I feel I can actually drive. But just not an MPV!! My previous instructor was worse than terrible, I learned nothing at all and he scarpered to India with a few hundred euro of my lesson money and didn't even register the lessons I did with him for the EDT so I had to start again. It really knocked my confidence and took me ages to get into a car again behind the wheel.

I was a passenger in 2 motor accidents, one of which a pedestrian was killed. I sat in the road with her for hours it seems. It was awful and the fault was with a learner driver speeding through a light. She kept going for a mile and finally ran back and I had to try calm her down. The thoughts of me causing an accident to someone or my kids really worries me. This has all led to me being a very anxious learner. I used to get migraines at the thoughts of having a driving lesson. But my new instructor helps.

Backround done, so after finding the smallest family car I could find that would fit 3 carseats (renault scenic automatic) DH went to buy it. But came back with a grand scenic 7 seater automatic instead. He isn't mean, just thoughtless and thought there was no difference in size of the car and it'd be grand. So the car has been sitting in the drive while I wait for my test and so now theres this car I can technically drive I am getting pressure from my mother to take it out everyday to bring the kids to school and clubs even though legally I can't as I have no passenger. DH cycles to work and works long hours and away a bit so I am just expected to get on with the rest and he says he trusts me to drive unaccompanied. There is a lovely dent in the car from where I knocked our pillar already.

I have money coming to me in March, not a lot but enough for a small automatic run around which I can use with an instructor for lessons and use for my test. Then I can use it for me and my youngest for the 2 minute drive to school and myself for shopping etc. My family feel I should suck it up and drive the car thats in the driveway and I am over thinking it totally. Thing is I don't feel comfortable in the big car. DH has agreed to the small car and I know insurance will be more but says we can suck it up for a year no problem. Though my mam feels that as a SAHM i am putting too much pressure on my dh in "asking for a car" and its madness to have two cars as my dh cycles. No chance of selling 7 seater.

If you are still with me thanks! So AIBU to say no I don't want the 7 seater and get a small learner car or suck it up and take out the big car and hope for the best?

OP posts:
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Babbaganush · 27/01/2017 13:22

Are you actually driving without having passed your test?????

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Whatthefreakinwhatnow · 27/01/2017 13:24

honestly, drive the big car! I have three so had to get a 7 seater, straight after passing and it's actually nicer to drive than the small car I learnt in. You'll be fine and save so much money!

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HateSummer · 27/01/2017 13:24

You're driving without a licence? 😱 No insurance?! 😱

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Vandree · 27/01/2017 13:25

Of course I'm not driving without my test. But I am being expected to just get on with it and its a huge argument when I say no.

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VacantExpression · 27/01/2017 13:32

You have two issues. The pressure to drive illegally is completely ridiculous and the person suggesting it needs to be told absolutely no way and to never suggest such a thing again.

I think you have anxieties towards driving that you are putting on the bigger car- the bigger car isn't actually the issue I don't think, I "just" think you are anxious- and understandably so with your negative experiences (and little or no support). Pass your test, practice parking in bigger quieter car parks than the school car park! You'll get there.

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NotCitrus · 27/01/2017 13:46

MPVs are actually quite good for practicing in - yes they are a bit big and unwieldy but you are sitting higher up and have a good view of everything. Also other cars see you more easily and get out of your way more.

Your anxiety is understandable but I would find a recommended nice instructor and go for it in the car you have. I was a nervous driver but since getting our MPV I've practiced a lot and got quite confident. Knowing there's virtually no chance of exceeding the speed limit in it is helpful too!

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