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AIBU?

AIBU to ask you to sign this to help the families of stillborn babies.

33 replies

RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 10:33

My friend's daughter was stillborn at 23 weeks old. Sarah was in labour for 7 hours before giving birth to Rowan, who had died in the womb from a heart condition. Because Rowan was born before 24 weeks it was classed as a miscarriage and a birth or death certificate could not be issued. Please consider signing this petition to change this for Sarah and Nick, and every other family facing the same experience.

www.change.org/p/department-of-health-uk-allow-registered-birth-certificates-for-children-born-from-20-weeks?recruiter=45838847&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=facebook&utm_campaign=autopublish&utm_term=mob-xs-share_petition-no_msg

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RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 10:33

Link fail, trying to sort it out.

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RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 10:35

How do I link?

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mambono5 · 27/01/2017 10:37

Seems to work if you press enter after copying the link, before posting

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RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 10:37

Thank you so much mambono5!

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Dizzywizz · 27/01/2017 10:39

Signed xx

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RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 10:40

Thank you Dizzywizz

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mambono5 · 27/01/2017 10:42

No worries. Smile

I think that it is such an important change, not sure why it's not the case yet.
I am sure it's not that simple, and someone will come back with the link with legal abortion for example, but it is heartbreaking for parents.

Flowers for this poor couple and all the others.

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SexTrainGlue · 27/01/2017 10:45

Yes, there was a thread about this before, and the point was repeatedly made that there is an interplay between the abortion law and the age of legal viability. Heartbreaking, I agree, but cannot be wished into non-existence because of that.

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PotteringAlong · 27/01/2017 10:45

Can I ask a question?

If they issue a birth certificate under 24 weeks then it's classed as a birth and gives a level of recognition to that baby. I can completely see why people might want that. However, are there not implications here for late term abortions? Is that not part of the reason for the 24 week cut off? Would you have to have a birth certificate if you had an abortion after 20 weeks? Again, I can completely see why some people having a TFMR (which the majority will be at that point) might want that. But there will be people who don't.

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PotteringAlong · 27/01/2017 10:46

Cross posts! Sorry, I hadn't seen the previous thread Flowers

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Rainydayspending · 27/01/2017 10:47

Absolutely those who want this should be able to access / apply.
For those wanting this recognition it should definitely be available.

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RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 10:49

I am very much pro-choice and have wondered about this myself. Sarah admits there are a lot of legal complications to this. I wonder if it could be done on a choice basis?

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PrincessNakedAsAJayBird · 27/01/2017 10:51

Have signed and absolutely agree for Rainy- for those who wish this it should absolutely be available.

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mambono5 · 27/01/2017 10:51

For a parent, losing a baby at 18, 20 or 26 weeks makes no difference. It's just as painful, and it's your baby you lost. I also understand the heartache about parent having to make horrendous decisions.

Not easy subject, and so painful. I wish people had a choice, so I have signed of course.

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Birdsgottafly · 27/01/2017 10:55

I've signed a petition that calls for a BC, but if a death certificate is issued, then wouldn't that mean that an autopsy has to be done, as is the case in unexplained deaths in Babies?

It certainly needs debating and these petitions will start that.

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AuntieStella · 27/01/2017 10:58
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Birdsgottafly · 27/01/2017 10:58

""I wonder if it could be done on a choice basis""

No it couldn't, but thinking about it further, there could be a different type of BC, for Stillborn babies.

They were once noted in the Parish records, so previously they would be officially named and documented.

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mambono5 · 27/01/2017 11:00

*POSSIBLY TRIGGERING, PLEASE DON'T READ IF SUBJECT IS TOO SENSITIVE**

Can you not refuse autopsy for a baby or child? Please tell me they can force a parent to go through that! (not sure who "they" are)

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ohfourfoxache · 27/01/2017 11:01

Signed Thanks

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RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 11:09

Thank you to all that have signed so far.

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Oldraver · 27/01/2017 11:10

Yes I will sign, I think you should have the option of a birth certificate and the legalities of it need debating.

My Firstborn was before the old limit (28 weeks) and the person who delivered damaged him irreprabley him told me.."we dont consider it a birth at this point, its just a miscarriage". As he did live for a short while we did get a birth and death certificate.

As it was we were asked if we would consent to a post-mortem to see if there were any other factors etc. It wasn't compulsory but we thought somehow it would help. Though all knowledge of the post mortem have since been denied by the health authority

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RestlessTraveller · 27/01/2017 11:12

Flowers for you Oldraver

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MrsLouisTomlinson · 27/01/2017 11:15

Parents can absolutely refuse a post-mortem in the case of a stillbirth or miscarriage. They are offered but not compulsory.

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FishInAWetSuitAndFlippers · 27/01/2017 11:16

mambo They need to have a cause of death on a death certificate, one of my children had to have a post mortem regardless of what I wanted, the other didn't as the cause of death was expected and they knew what it was.

It's a really difficult one to navigate, I have had to register the deaths of 2 of my children, and it was a horrendous and complicated process, but ultimately I think the 24 week point is correct.

It's difficult to take the emotion out of it and look at things just from a legal viewpoint only though when it's your child.

I think hospitals do a certificate of sorts for the parents which is as good a compromise as there can be in the circumstances.

Flowers

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