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AIBU?

To have gone mad at DH for this?

54 replies

Mashathebear · 26/01/2017 18:27

I've name changed because im so fuckimg embarrassed about this and would be so ashamed if I was ever outed.

I've just had a baby 2 weeks ago. I'm currently in the hazy stage, it's my first child. I've put on ALOT of weight through the pregancy (3 stone) and let's say I don't look very pretty at the moment.

My DH always watches the tv in bed before going to sleep. Last night I woke and rolled over and caught glimpse of the tv and it was one of those babestation channels (she had knickers on but tits out) my DH scrabbled for the controller but I then noticed he was in the middle of wanking.

I was so upset I stormed out of the room crying. Firstly that he would do that next to me whilst I was asleep and secondly with our newborn in the room!!! I'm so disgusted I can't even look at him. AIBU or is it just my hormones making me feel so sad and upset?

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FourEyesGood · 26/01/2017 18:30

YANBU. Wanking over someone else while he's in bed with you is vile and totally disrespectful.

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Trifleorbust · 26/01/2017 18:34

Oh no, I would go batshit. So disrespectful at the best of times but 2 weeks post birth? Angry I wouldn't mind him wanking but I would be furious about the circumstances.

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Ipitythescale · 26/01/2017 18:35

YANBU. Absolutely disgusting to do that with you both right there beside him. What has he said since?

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AnyFucker · 26/01/2017 18:35

Ugh

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MummaGiles · 26/01/2017 18:37

That's disgusting with you both in the room. Please tell him how upset it has made you.

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ClopySow · 26/01/2017 18:37

Wanking to porn wouldn't bother me. Wanking to porn in bed next to me whole i was asleep would really upset me, never mind being post baby vulnerable.

Tosser - in many many ways.

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BusterGonad · 26/01/2017 18:38

That is truly awful, let's be honest he's only human but to wank in bed next to you when you are sleeping after just literally having a baby, with the baby in the room!!!! It's one thing to have a sneaky one while you're out the house but ffs....I'd be so upset. You must feel really hurt. He's literally a wanker!!!!

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yaela123 · 26/01/2017 18:38

YAdefinatelyNBU! That's disgraceful.

What did he think would happen if you woke up? Seems very stupid to me.

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Mulberry72 · 26/01/2017 18:39

Oh that's horrible OP Flowers

Such a disrespectful thing to do Shock

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AllTheBabies · 26/01/2017 18:39

A man having a wank is fine.

But in bed next to you, wanking and watching porn two weeks after you gave birth? I'm not surprised you're so upset Sad

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DJBaggySmalls · 26/01/2017 18:40

YANBU, thats grim Flowers

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Littleballerina · 26/01/2017 18:43

Incredibly disrespectful.
What has he said about it?

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Mashathebear · 26/01/2017 18:43

He is extremely embarrassed, has tried apologising over and over again and I won't have it. He said he had just finished watching a film and was flicking through the channels on freeview and came across that and was so sexually frustrated he just did it without thinking. He said he didnt want to pester me with satisfying him.

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Iknowyouwontlikethis · 26/01/2017 18:44

I'm not bothered if dh watched it. Or did have a sneaky one. But if I was asleep next to him I would be very upset. You need to talk to him when you calm down and say that's not on. It's just disrespectful. He could of at least left the room!

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ShowMePotatoSalad · 26/01/2017 18:45

His explanation sounds totally plausible and he's apologised over and over again. While I understand you being upset about him doing it I think you might be being a bit unreasonable to be angry at him now.

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Hillfarmer · 26/01/2017 18:47

he didnt want to pester me with satisfying him.

Jesus H, what a fucking hero!

What, is he supposed to get a medal for not pestering you for sex two weeks after you gave birth? He's got to do better than that. What a noble knight he is.

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gunsandbanjos · 26/01/2017 18:47

I have no issue with porn, or wanking. But do it at an appropriate time.

Beside your sleeping wife who gave birth 2 weeks ago with your newborn baby in the room is not that time.

I'd be upset too.

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LegoCaltrops · 26/01/2017 18:47

The reason is fair enough. Could he not have had enough self control to go to another room though!?

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AwkwardTurtles · 26/01/2017 18:48

I'd probably let it go. It's a bit grim, but not the end of the world Flowers congrats on the baby 😊

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ScarletForYa · 26/01/2017 18:50

He just did it 'without thinking' ?

Ugh, just gross, what is he a dog? Wanking with a baby in the room is wrong, seriously wrong. Angry

I would be furious. I wouldn't know what to do.

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PotteringAlong · 26/01/2017 18:51

In all honesty I can't see the problem. You were asleep. You had a baby 2 weeks ago. He wanted a wank. Did he wake you up and pester you for sex? No. Did he pressurise you in any way? No. Did he sort himself out quickly and quietly? Yes. Your baby is 2 weeks old. Them being in the room asleep makes no odds at all.

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Trifleorbust · 26/01/2017 18:51

Did he actually try to make out he was doing you a courtesy by not waking you up to perform a sex act when you have just given birth?

Angry

Keep him in the dog house for a bit.

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Paddingtonthebear · 26/01/2017 18:53

I would be furious and very upset.

He's behaved like a massive tosser.

He has huge making up to do.

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Italiangreyhound · 26/01/2017 19:05

Totally horrible.

" He said he didnt want to pester me with satisfying him." How thoughtful of him.

I think it is horrible but eventually you need to have a talk about what is and is not acceptable. This is not acceptable.

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Gatehouse77 · 26/01/2017 19:06

Can honestly say it wouldn't bother me.

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